LT5,

Anything happen with that girl at work?

Got another chick in the sights. She works for another location in our organization. I went to that location like a week or two ago and she was sitting with who I was talking to and we started a conversation, etc. Didn't think much of it. Found her on FB through people you may know (no, really, I didn't stalk her). Asked for her # and said we should do something on Sunday since we are both off, she said cool sounds fun.

What makes this pretty stupid is that I have a friend that works with her. I asked the friend what she thought of the girl just for thought's sake. Wrong move, it turns out the friend likes me LOL. I figured this out because immediately after I asked about the girl, she said she had to go etc. Next day my friend told her boss (who is like my brother) that she tried flirting with me but that I shot it down for ____ (the girl in question).

The friend asked me if I wanted her to ask ____ what she thought of me. I said what, no... long story short, she asked anyways. ____ says she isn't sure because she "hasn't looked at me like that yet" but she told the friend that we're going out on Sunday.

She lives like 20 miles away so I'm planning on either going to her end or just taking her out somewhere mid-way. Anything I should do given the stupid friend thing, or am I just making this a big deal where it doesn't need to be?

Gus, I have a couple ideas but it was still a little too cryptic. So..

Que?

lol, just read the spoiler and just pretend Facebook is the first word in the image.

What kind of co-worker doesn't accept a FR, even just out of simple courtesy? I could send a FR to
10 random people in my school and at least 5 would accept.

I've worked with plenty of people who don't want to have any colleagues on facebook

Buying chicks drinks = super beta, come on you can do better next time

I am starting to see the benefits of Henry's pay to avoid awkwardness. I was at a dive bar where most people were drinking whatever the cheapest(10oz high life $1) so I was the only one drinking what I was drinking. Somehow someone else winds up with my drink, which hasnt happened to me often so I assume she must have ****ed up. I tried to explain this to her but she refused to take any responsibility and still charged me for it. I am a little insecure about people thinking I'm a passive pussy and this was like 10+ drinks in so I wound up arguing with her and yelling that I was stiffing her for her **** up.

Now I think the bar kinda sucks lately but we still go there as a team for socials so I'll be going there at least a couple times a month. Its very cheap relative to my current budget so I could have afforded a $4 drink+ modest tip like 5 on 25 and ultimately I think I would get more than $9 value out of not having happen. FML

Also because there are so many dive bars in my college town I am curious to hear the Henry dive bar pickup advice.

There were 3 about average looking girls maybe 4 5 and 6. I was just wandering around and I noticed one of teammates talking to them so I went over and started talking to all of them. I thought he came off a little douchey but he is one of our best players and we just destroyed the other team so he may have been especially confident today. He did wind up inviting them to some other party that was going on later that night and ultimately not talking to them too much so he may have played this well for the level of atractiveness of the girls.

I find out the hottest one of the girls has my same major but seems like a boring topic so didn't get into that too much. After talking to them for a few minutes I just kinda went back to wandering around talkin to different people.

It wasn't really significant in and of itself but I am kinda curious what I should have done if I wanted to try to persue one of them more. They were sitting at a table with one seat open so I could have just sat next to the hottest one. I had a lot of friends there and I'd say a good amount if not damn near all of them would still be into the 4-6 range so I don't think there would have been a problem with like the friends cockblocking me. I am not so good at the escalation part though.

Also I'm admittedly a huge newb and I'm not sure what everything means. Like at one point about an hour after I first talked to them I was wandering around and the 5 called me over. I was kinda drunk and don't really remember exactly what I wound up saying to them but I think I got bored and wandered off after a couple minutes

kinda stream of consciousness here any thoughts?

^^ Sounds like Ithaca iyam

Not a big deal at this point, since that was like 2 months ago now.

nothing is awkward or anything between us when we work.

The strategy for dive bars is don't go to them. They are depressing and if there is more than two somewhat attractive girls in the entire venue that would be a good night. Chance of getting into a physical confrontation are much higher than anywhere else. It is just a bad idea.

do you avoid eye contact? do you still say hi?

I am curious about venue selection. Because its a college town with a low cost of living there is almost always some kind of cheap drink so it's hard to classify only based on that. Should I look for places with cover?Bouncer who doesn't let everyone in? Or should I just talk to people who go out a lot and figure it out that way

Look at which place has the hottest girls? Some of the cheap places definitely have plenty of attractive girls

Bear in mind that given Henry's age/circumstances his suggestion to avoid dive bars applies more so to guys who would look to be macking girls who are at least mid 20s

First I think we might have a different idea of what a dive bar is. There are no atmosphere cheap booze bars for young people that people go to their first couple of years after turning legal. They have some attractive girls but the percentage is still not that good. These kind of places looks are the biggest factor followed by a willingness to take advantage of girls drinking too much. When I was in school I would go to one on Sundays and after university some of my younger friends would drag me to them occasionally. I don't like them and never had much luck. If anything I did much better outside those types of venues than inside.

A dive bar proper tends to be on the wrong side of the tracks and really doesn't cater to students as much as people who have failed at life.

When it comes to venue selection it is dictated by where the girls are. In a big city that would be EDM clubs that are difficult to get into. In a smaller town I have no idea. People who live there and go out a lot would be your best source of information.

Burly,

Never tell a waitress you're going to stiff her even if she's in the wrong. If there's a problem speak to a manager or just stop going to a place. Drunkenly yelling at waitstaff you won't tip them is a great way to draw negative attention to yourself.

As far as these cheap college towns just find where the attractive girls in your school go. I know there won't be any upscale places but almost every college has cute girls and they have to drink somewhere. I know some colleges don't so if you go to one of those and you're not a genius I suggest transferring. I don't understand going to a bar where the service is bad and there are not attractive girls.

So (apparently) I met this cute girl at a let it ride table (drunk) last year. She added me on facebook b/c she remembered me, but I did not remember her whatsoever. I guess we talked for about two hours in our initial meeting.


So we talked on occasion for about 6 months through facebook. Eventually I called her. We had a good conversation for about 40 minutes on the phone.

I hung out with her recently. Took her to a bar for a couple of drinks. I brought her to my car after and obviously went for the kiss and the feel. I also asked her to come back to my place, and got pretty impatient about it. The drinks will do that. She did not oblige needless to say. In hindsight I realize how bad my manners were here.


This weekend she stood me up two nights in a row. She has led me on, and did not pick up my calls today. TBH... I deserved it. The lesson here is don't be a pushy ******* or women will not **** you.

Your reaction was bad, but the service was beyond horrible.
She should have given you a new drink, no questions asked.

As soon as a place can be that big of a dick to its customers, it's bad news.
They will do so and the crowd will get worse.

This is what really hurts me imo....All my friends back home only want to go to these **** "dive" bars and locals bars where there are no attractive girls and yes, it is just depressing. They say they want a place where they can just talk and say the more upscale venues are just full of "bros" and too dark and loud. Maybe I just need to make new friends....

Quick question: girl I went on three dates with two weeks ago or so but never hooked up with still texts me to say hi and ask how my day is going. She's okay but kinda dull and I'm not interested in going out with her again. Better to just stop responding or say you're a cool girl but I just don't think we have chemistry like that?

yea buddy,

Why don't you guys drink at home then? Dive bars are typically pretty loud, dirty, and filled with rowdy people. The opposite is true at a nice bar or lounge. Definitely gonna have to expand the friend circle.

This is my most recent girl.

Assuming she's not in your extended social circle, just cease contact.

So real quick, a girl i've been hanging out with lately, think i mentioned her earlier itt, texts me saying shes not looking for anything serious right now.

This is in response to me supposedly drunk texting her that I like her and i want her to be my gf friday night. I know, terrible.

So while we do enjoy hanging out, as far as i can tell, and have hooked up(made out) multiple times is she saying she doesnt want anything to do with me or can i say like ok we can keep it casual and hope for a friends with benefits scenario to work itself out?