Unless she fancies your dad and uses you as a way to get him.

Similarly, zero chance of success when hitting on a girl when her parents are there?

I actually think it's possible if her parents want her to move on.
I know my mom actively tries to get my sister to check out guys.

Depends on too many factors to just give an answer but certainly not zero

Thoughts on girls inviting you into their bed? (already this sounds ridic and misplayed by me)

So turns out my blow-up text to Girl With BF in Egypt actually seemed to work kinda well, since a few texts later she's inviting me to visit her. I found that a bit odd but presumably a positive thing, considering I've just nailed my colours to the mast. We had a real nice evening together, I was supposed to drive back home that night but I suggested staying on her sofa (polite) so we could go out for more drinks. She agreed, and later in the night she said "yeah, you're not staying on the sofa." However, she said it right as I said something, and I didn't want to retrospectively pick up her comment. Obvs knew I wouldn't be on the sofa though.

We get back to hers, put a movie on and we get into bed. Before any judgements, please bear in mind: 1) she has invited me to sleep in her bed before, years ago, and rejected an advance there. 2) I'm desperately conscious of not pushing anything too hard too fast that might spoil what is a really nicely growing 'relationship'. 3) She knows that I know she has a BF, so coming onto her sexually would possibly make me look bad? Even though I feel like she's basically cheating on him anyway since I know I wouldn't be happy about my girlfriend spending time a guy the way this girl and I do. I initiated a cuddle which she responded well to, but didn't push for anything further. General reads on that situation?

She's coming to visit me on Tuesday fwiw, so obvs it'll be clearer after that if I did misplay it or not.

lol this is getting crazy now

You'll get laid soon if you don't do anything to **** it up but this is pretty non-standard behaviour although not completely unheard of.

Forgive my ignorance disko- I presume you mean I misplayed?

no, no i wouldn't say that. my "crazyness" was directed toward here or, more specifically, her indecision.

she likes you. she likes her bf. her relationship with her bf is a stable crutch but there are obviously things lacking in it because he's so far away. she wants those things but i guess she's scared to lose everything if it doesn't work out with you. so now she's finding a way to get those missing things (company, cuddling, late-night phone calls, all the things girls do with their bfs who dont live in another continent) through you but is withholding sex/physical contact because it makes her feel like she isn't cheating and isn't jeopardizing what she has with her BF.

i think this situation is totally unfair to you which is why i wanted you to basically give her an ultimatum awhile ago. it's never a good thing to let the woman dictate the relationship (women are indecisive and overly sensitive) but you're letting her. i know you tried to take control the other day but unless you back it up by NOT acting like her replacement, back-up bf then she's not going to take you seriously.

Thanks, makes a lot of sense. Though, I don't know if she is actually with-holding physical contact/sex or if I'm just missing the opportunity (not that sex is the #1 priority here for me). After all, on the very first date we kissed- she's mildly sexually cheated on him, not to mention the myriad of 'emotional' cheating which in his shoes, would tilt me more than a random kiss imo.

I do plan to give the ultimatum. I just wanna make sure it's at a point that is most optimal for me, and I feel that if I just spend a bit more time with her (we've only met up 3 times properly) I can make that decision easier for her, in my favour. I'm definitely not going to sit around and wait for her, and I told her as such a few weeks ago (albeit drunkenly). So just gotta get the right time for the ultimatum; she's visiting on Tuesday so maybe then.

Thanks again!

Had a GCG, WSOP Michael moment with a waitress last night. There really is no way to pick up a chick on 1min interaction. Would have to get the boys and go back for a meal lol.

WonThyme I actually like your play there. You didn't misplay at all imo, most people itt would have tried unsuccessfully to get laid right then and there.

The "you're not sleeping on the sofa" is a very good future indicator of poundtown imo

Dont turn this rape into a murder.

I don't understand why guys go for girls that cheat on their bfs. What makes you think they won't cheat on you? Unless you are planning to just hit it and run, of course.

Don't give ultimatums. Any ultimatum in general is always a sign of weakness. In general you can dictate the behavior you want without ultimatums. In this case it was suggested that she is "using" you, but that was based on one or two incorrect assumptions: because you were either letting her use you or encouraging her to [by cuddling her] or by buying into her frame (by framing cuddling as something only she wants, instead of what you both want.)

My advice is do what you want... for example if you want to **** her then make a move. If you dont want to then dont, etc. But theres no need to give her an ultimatum and basically try to increase the stress level of the situation for no reason.

same unicorn lord from huff and stapes? if so ohai

backstory- ive liked this girl for a while, we go to different schools about an hr away so we didnt see each other much during the fall semester. We hung out 4-5 times during winter break when she was back in town and she started showing interest more than before. havent made a move yet fwiw

So last night i was in her city out drinking with friends for my bday. She had an event for her sorority and shes only 20 so she couldnt join. I told her to meet me after so we can go get food.

She picks me up at 2am. We go to her apt to drop off her car and so she could get a jacket, and we walk to meet up with the rest of my friends. So the walk was about 10-15 and she mentions that she hung out with a 31 yr old guy thats friends with her sisters bf, and he was buying her drinks and everytime she lost to him in pool she let him kiss her on the cheek. I thought it was kinda creepy and told her why the eff is she hanging with a 31yr and she jokingly said so you dont approve, why? i said you know why (its pretty clear and she knows i have feelings for her), and she played dumb. Then she asked if I hooked up with any girls tonight, which tilted me that she would ask me that. Im thinking it was some sort of test but idk.

She invited me last week to be her date for her sororitys gala thats tmrw night, which is a pretty big event im told. I would prob say i was busy if it was another girl who i was just friends with, but I think this is a good opportunity to make something happen.

Thoughts?

i don't see why you would say no to the sorority event if it was another girl if you were attracted to her like you are with this one.

this seems like the stereotypical 20yo girl who likes a guy but for whatever reason never lets him hit it. then as soon as you get a gf she'll try to **** you.

**** you and memories playing in your head.

it's obviously above 0, but you're the unicorn lord so in your case it is 0, judging from your nerdy persona on two jacks.

YOU TAKE YOUR DAMN HANDS OFF OF HER BIFF

lol perfect gif

Would normally agree, but it's somewhat different in this case imo, when you can hardly what they have a relationship, seeing each other perhaps twice a year. It's not even like they were together for years then he moved away; fairly sure it's like a holiday romance type thing.

I don't know how I'd dictate 'get rid of your bf plz' without really being explicit about it. All the while I'm not explicit, she has no reason to make such a decision. Unless I'm missing something (which I probs am). I want to **** her obvs, but that isn't the main priority; I wanna get together with her. I'm not sure how I make that 100% undoubtable without saying something along the lines of "how about breaking off the relationship you yourself described as complicated and problematic". With a couple more days together, she'll have developed a more than reasonable idea of what it would be like to be with me. Therefore if I give her an ultimatum after a couple more meet ups, then imo I'll likely get a positive response if she likes me to the same extent, or if its a negative response then I was probably always fighting a losing battle. I'm not entirely sure though. There is a unanimous opinion without the few friends I've told the situation to that I would have to really, really play it horribly to not end up being with her; I do worry that an ultimatum could be one of the ways of ****ing this up.

I still don't like giving girls ultimatums. You are much better off getting her to like you to a point where the non-exclusivity will get her to act.

Fair. I'm not delighted about the ultimatum line so won't definitely be using it. See how the next couple of meetups go I suppose.