So my account was banned by some POG mod for apparent trolling. BOOOO! Gimmick account time - (wrane)

Here's a question -

What happens if she's over at your house or out to dinner or something. LDO most of the time you're going to have to make the first move right? Say you're watching a movie together. The couch is pretty big and your sitting on opposite sides. Talking dies down and lights off and you're pretty sure she at least 'likes' you. You want to move it but don't want to ruin all the hard work by making things awkward. How do you do this smoothy?

Please don't say the yawn.

I've always wanted to and think that this might actually be +++++EV but I'm not sure:

Going into a long story about fishing with your father. It shows family/care and all that nonsense (). Make the story really long and la de da. Fished for 6 hours. NOT ONE CATCH. Stuff like that. Then when it begins to get boring, say you reeled one in. A huge one. Then precede to measure size with you arms. Then say "Ah, no no no, it was much bigger (get a sexual metaphor in there)". Procede to place one arm around her shoulder and re-measure the fish.

Yay/nay?

my move is to leave the lights on. half hour in you get up to get something, turn lights off, sit closer.
no idea what you just rambled on about though.

You sitting there with her. Not close enough right? Doesn't that always happen? You need to get in closer but you don't want to just shuffle in, that's too forced. You don't want to pull the old 'yawn' arm over shoulders move either. Not funny, not cool, cliche, etc. etc.

You pull my fish story out. This is going on during the previews or whatever. You tell her something like

you: Do you like fishing?
her: (no)
you: Oh really? Well, I have one really cool story that might get you interested.
her: (being polite) Oh hm?
you: Well, long ago, I was a wee lad. My father and I decided to some father-son bonding. He took me to a secret double hungarian reverse fishing spot extremely remote. We woke up at 5, and did the whole nine yards. You know like buy worms, have cool hats, colour lures etc. So we're bushwacking through the forest and we finally get there. Beautiful day. Orange sun rising, the smell of dew in the morning. So I'm like 12 and super excited. We sit on the lakeside and I cast my line. I'm sitting there just daydreaming about the fish I'm going to catch and nothing. I mean nothing happens. My father is on the other side catching 5, 10, 15 fishes and I see them all swiggling around the water but I can't catch a single one. I try again after lunch and again nothing. Not even a nibble. I'm starting to feel depressed and terrible. My father offers assisstance but NO. I want to do this on my own. Day goes on the same, I'm just sitting there hours on end holding a stick. The sun is setting and we're about to head home. I decide I do one last cast. BAM! In the water. Then suddenly boom. I almost get pulled in to the water. A monster. I CAUGHT OGOPOGO! I'm battling this goliath for minutes until I finally reel him in. It was really amazing
her: (boring ass ****) Oh yeah?
You: Yeah, it was like this big
*MAKE SIZE OF PRETEND FISH IN FRONT*
her: (really boring ass ****) Oh wow!
You: Actually no, it was bigger.
*REACH AROUND HER AND SAY
You: Yeah, it was THIS BIG.


Least expected. Bam! If you time this right, the movie should come on just as this happens.

Never actually tried this, but I'm really thinking about it.

lol i doubt after boring the **** outta her with the story she is going to be in any mood to make sexy time with u, jst dod the old lean down to grab something off ground (old m&m from under couch for sustainance) or table and then just sit back closer. if she likes u she/ you shouldnt be too worried bout it being awkward for a second, she wants u to be closer too.

This is truly the most awful way I could imagine to initiate something. This might have worked when you were 15.

Dude, if you do this, please have someone sitting a row or two back to videotape and post on here. I'd effin love to see this. Seriously.

Haha I almost posted this too. Then I realized I could just go watch High School Musical 2.

Exactly my thoughts.


Please do this!!

that whole post is fake.
no one is that dumb.

I thought so, but why would someone make a gimmick pretending to be wrane just to post that? Or why would wrane make an alt account and risk a ban simply to post that?

And considering some of the other stuff I've seen on this thread, nothing surprises me anymore.

Regarding the 'yawn' - severely underrated imo. But you gotta pull it off right, you gotta make sure she knows you aren't being serious. The 'lovable idiot' type of guy pulls it off well. I'm pretty much that and the yawn has a 100% success rate (albeit about 3 girls) of getting snugglier with the girls I've had over. Got to get it right, do it with the right facial expression, the right comments after she's all like "wtf you loser".

fish dude---this has to be a level. even i'm not that dumb with girls

yea i agree if you really exaggerate it so its completely obvious what you are doing, then it can work. it will never work if youre seriously thinking that its a smooth trick.

f*ck her yet?

Ok another one. Xposting from the EDF post but they know **** in that one so I'm giving my hopes to you guys . Need help on the quoted post aswell if possible.
BUT, to make things more interesting. She added me on facebook and she seems to be obsessed w/ it and keeps updating her status every minute w/ what she does etc. And she has twitter. So I just recently checked her twitter for the first time (boored) and it says along the lines of (times is evening, Wednesday):

6pm: resting before my guest arrives...
9.30pm: guest is here and bottle number two is opened
12pm: no wine left but guest still here...

AND GET THIS. After I read this **** I get a text from her, about 1am, asking me why I hadn't replied yet to a text she sent earlier today asking me if I was still on tomorrow. I didn't find the text replyworthy but after the second I sent a "yes I'm still on" reply.. But then I started thinking, henceforth this post.

If anyone has read 'I hope they serve beer in hell', I'm immediately getting the feeling that she's having one guy over today, and me tomorrow. I'm not a guy that does sloppy seconds ffs. How big chance do you think it is that this is true? And if so, how do I neglect the invitation tomorrow? She probably doesn't know I've read the twittermessages.

Very long, I know. Sorry (I find the situation quite interesting tho').

No, it's me. Made this account long ago as a prop-bet (loser has to use it for a week) but turns out I won. Got banned and wanted to post something.

^This is obviously what I was trying to go for. You pull it off as a goofball and I think that's why making it long is the key. A friend of mine uses this regulary although another version (counting shoulders or something) and stands beside it claiming that it works. Do it with a grin/smirk or whatever.

Three things:

A) I'm making a judgment of her personality from afar based on her obsessive status/twitter updates, but she would probably annoy me. She might not annoy you though, who knows.

B) You are reading far too much into your stalking of her twitter account. That could mean anything. Is she really phrasing the tweets that way with the word "guest?" Is there any indication of gender? Either way, you're reading too much into it. Do you really think she has a guy over and she's sitting there obsessively tweeting about it? It is quite weird, however, that she would do that with any guest over.

C) Your paranoia of being "sloppy seconds" coupled with your quoted post where you ask a million questions to find out whether it's socially acceptable or not for you to be with this girl is quite sad. Especially the quoted part. Wow.

It is still quite odd. You would have to build up a significant rapport with a girl to pull this off, even in a goofball manner, and not look like a complete idiot. It may be so intricate that it looks totally staged and planned, and that's just creepy.

Once you have that rapport, this routine obviously is not needed anymore.

Hahahah, thanks

A) No, I don't like that personality either. But she still has a nice body.
B) Do you really think so? Now granted, she is from the little I've seen more obsessed with social networking sites etc than 98% of 20-29y.o, but who really ever tweets about having a friend over and just chilling if it wasn't something, somewhat special? Also, of course I'm reading too much into it. That's why I'm posting here.
And yes, the messages are correct, with the punctuation, smiley and everything. No gender whatsoever.
C) Well, quite frankly, I don't want to plow through a hole that another guy has been in less than 24hrs ago. The sad part, I agree with

Addressing B and C:

B) If you are going to stalk her twitter and read into it, then you need to consider her audience. Who is she tweeting to? What information is she possibly getting to them by accomplishing this tweet? Who does she tweet with?

Now think about the fact that I just discussed going through that entire process and realize how ridiculous it is. The fact of the matter is you are trying to make a concrete conclusion out of miserably incomplete information.

Overall, you just seem hell bent on coming up with every excuse imaginable to not sleep with her. Believe it or not, just because she wants to sleep with you, she's female and she has a nice body... you don't HAVE to sleep with her. It's not a requirement of being alive or a man. If you don't want to sleep with her, then don't. It's probably better that way anyways.

C) You seem more concerned with what other people will think of you rather than what you think yourself. Look at the quoted post in your OP: it's entirely about the outside perception of your situation. You even go to lengths to let us all know that you do well for yourself otherwise. Why did you feel that was necessary to include? Think about it.

You admit you don't have an urge to do it. Then don't.

Edit - I realize my response to C can be viewed as hypocritical, because clearly the point of this thread is to seek outside advice. However, you need to consider it in the context of the way he posed his original question, rather than the fact that he posed a question at all.

B) I don't know who she's tweeting to actually. Probably anyone of her 300+ facebookfriends since she's got the URL posted on her profile. My guess would be that atleast a part of her fiends, and definitely some of the ones that read her twitter, knows who this guest is. I think that's a fairly obvious conclusion to make based on our knowledge.

Yes, I'm leaning towards not sleeping with her, that's correct. That's why I also wanted to get advice on how to neglect the invitation, is a "I just don't feel good" suffice? The reason I'm asking is that I probably know more about what she did today than she thinks. I also don't want to shut the door completely.

C) Yes I am concerned with it. Not that much in this situation as the quoted text should more be seen as 'fun knowledge' than serious information about the real issue.
I wouldn't want to say that I dated her if I met my friends with her tbqh. But that's because my standards for people I deem girlfriendmaterial and girls I sleep with is vastly different.
As a side note, I had fun writing the quoted text and probably exaggerated a bit for comedies sake.

This post may seem to have a defensive/negative feel about it and if so it isn't done on purpose, I'm glad I get to clear some of my questions.

Alexandre,

You seem like a hudge loser. Please tell me you're 18 so your personality/thoughts here are excusable...

hudge? I hope you mean huge so I answer you correctly.
No I'm at a university studying my 4th year. I'm probably perceived as a tool/loser here since I'm (well, I want to believe) anonymous here and I can ask the most trivial/stupid things here without reprimand in my real life and with the ease that I don't have to call/meet with friends to talk about, sometimes, rather trivial inquiries. I'm sorry that I don't try as hard as others to build myself as a keyboard warrior as much as you'd seem to prefer.

Haha, my questions about who she is tweeting to were asked to prove the point I made in the next paragraph. I didn't actually intend for you to answer them.

If you want to cancel it with her, I'm sure you can figure out a way. Something came up, I'm not feeling well, etc etc. She'll get the point.

[x] lol'd at the unintentional level accomplished here

Noes, you caught me before my ninjaedit.