you got really mad the last time i made a thread title about henry. even got goofy to change it!

Lots of respect!

Props to the guy who just sits down and "learns python".

Agreed.



I have an extended TR of sorts / introduction to myself. Be forewarned, it will be fruity / gay / wtf worthy.

Read last four paragraphs if not in for a long read. But I really hope you read it all.



Where to start. I'm a picky ****er with high standards, but also I have no interest in casual one night stands and such even though I'm only 20. Since I was 15 I have been talking to girls here and there looking for something that worked for me. At least a 9, quiet, open minded...I will stop here because this list could go on and on.

Five years all I wanted was a relationship, some companionship. Don't get me wrong I have a load of friends and was happy, but I yearned for a meaningful relationship. I was and am 100% certain that I wasn't gay, but my high standards and pickyness meant that most girls I talked to never interested me enough to continue anything with them. Physically perhaps they did, but I needed more. Cause I'm weird.

Ok so fast forward out of my teenage years to new years eve 2010. I'm out celebrating with friends and in our group of 6 or 7 there is a girl I've never seen before but I can't take my eyes off of her. I find out shes the sister of a girl I know who's in this particular social circle. The new gorgeous 10 and her sister have to leave and I instantly start grilling my other friend who knows the family better for more information. I'm gonna call the new girl Krypto. It turned out that Krypto had just broken up with her bf of two years or so, I'm gonna call him Prick.

I don't see the girl again for about 2 or 3 months, she just didn't come out to our social events with her sister. Then we were all out one night and Krypto was there again, and again I couldn't take my eyes off her. In fact she fascinated me to such an extent that I couldn't even talk to her and when I did I kept stuttering and saying stupid things.

I don't see her again for another two months or so. I was focusing on exams and stuff so I didn't think about her all that much but she was always in the back of my mind.
Then the very last day of my exams and my birthday just happened to line up so I had a gathering where I invited my 9 or 10 closest friends hoping to god that the girl I know would bring her sister (Krypto). She did, and I didn't **** up this time I talked and I talked and I talked to her and I felt ****ing great... It was my birthday, my exams were over, it was time for summer, and I was talking to a girl that I actually wanted to keep talking to for the first time in five years. Five ****ing long years.

She messaged me the next day on facebook, we chatted, I asked her out and she said yes. We were both busy so we didn't go out for about a week.

But once we go out we started to go out a lot, she lives a 10 min walk from me so literally any time we were free we were meeting up.

Then I get a random text like 3 weeks in saying sorry I don't think this will work out. Devastated. It was completely random, we were getting along so well.

So anyway I half guess half find out the reason for this but we don't really talk about it directly. I don't want to go into further details on this. So anyway we never really stopped talking and slowly started to see each other again over the next week.

Now things are going great, I got my college results and got into the course I wanted for next year and I got a good part time job at last and I was with the most wonderful girl I had ever met that it had taken me five years to find.

We were seeing each other every chance we got, I could feel her affection for me and things were going great. We were starting to get more and more physical and closer and closer.

Then disaster. She starts to distance herself, and I ask whats up. She says she thinks it won't work out ... she's not over her ex, Prick. I should mention here that we had talked about Prick and she had said she had broken up with him and that he was a very jealous guy and didn't let her go out with friends partying and stuff like that. Also anyone else I know who has met him thinks he's a Prick. I never thought I'd have to worry about him.

She says she wants Prick back and she was going to talk to him (Prick had a gf at this point). She told me this last Tuesday. Since then my life has been getting up in the morning, watching tv for a solid 6 or 7 hours and then go to work for 3 hours in the evening, more tv and then bed.

I am absolutely and utterly devastated. I talked to her again today and asked if she talked to Prick, she said she had and they were going to try it again.

It is so painful to lose this girl. It is twice as painful to know I lost her for someone else. I spent five years searching and I finally found this wonderful gorgeous fantastic girl ... and I get 6 weeks.

I will not lie, it was the best (without a shadow of a doubt) 6 weeks of my life. For the first time in my life I was truly happy and it was all because of her. I was planning to ease off and not see her like 5 times a week, but rather 2 or 3 times a week because I know seeing someone 5 times a week is very intense and will quickly lead to an end. But that doesn't matter now.

I guess I've come here for comfort. It's weird, I'm not angry towards Krypto at all. I'm angry at the world and the universe and how unfair this seems to me at the moment. It was only 6 weeks, but I want her back with every fibre of my being, there is very little I wouldn't do to have her back. She's the best thing that EVER happened to me. I spent the last 5 most "adult" years of my life waiting and wanting desperately to come across a girl that worked for me. And here she was ... and now she's gone.


This is going to be a weak paragraph for me. I have little experience as stated. But I do know that I have to get over this girl and I intend to. However I know that should an opportunity arise again I will take it in a heartbeat. So let me ask you guys this: Prick and Krypto were together 2 years, Krypto then left Prick because he was too jealous and would do things like tell her she wasn't allowed to go out or would pull her male friends away from her if they tried to dance with her. So she left him and then 6 months later wants him back conincidentally after being with me for 6 weeks or so. Did her brief relationship with me re-enforce feelings that she might still have for Prick, as in the feeling of a relationship missed the long term one they had? Is it possible she made a quick decision in going back to Prick?

Prick left his current gf for Krypto in and instant. Krypto told me they had a long talk but I didn't probe for specifics. Given my description of their relationship to this point, would it be usual for people to get back together after having problems which caused a breakup and make things work? Or is it likely to be a case of it will work for a while before old jealousy problems come back and end things again?

If it ends again I think I can get this girl back. This fact won't stop me getting over her though.

Final question. She lost a lot of friends in the last few years (not because of her personality, because something happened to her and her friends abandoned her because of it). She is now pretty much part of my close circle of friends. As much as I miss her and need to get over her, I'm ok with this. I want to be her friend (not only because I want to try and get her again). Pretty much the whole circle of friends think I'm a great guy and Prick is just that, a Prick. Could this influence Krypto that she perhaps made a mistake in going back to Prick over me? I'm also getting pretty close with Kryptos sister (friendship-wise nothing more) and the sisters are close to one another. Could my closeness to the sister and the sisters opionion of Prick help me in that in the sisters closeness they will talk about the relationships and the sister might root for me?

Lastly. Am I crazy? Cause I feel ****ed up and crazy and as if I should be able to blow off this 6 week spat and **** every girl that would be willing. But I'm not like that. It took me five years to find this girl and I can get over her to the point where I can be happy and friends. But I want her back, desperately.


I would really appreciate replies, I would say leave out the idiot, gay, wtf, man-up or other type of comments but I know that would be no use. This being said, even if I get know productive or helpful replies it has been mildly calming to write this.

Now this really is the last thing. The real kicker of this whole story? I'm a closed off mother****er and can't really open up to anyone but this girl. Ergo, I can only talk about my desperation and sadness over Krypto...with Krypto.

Jason out.

Jason,

No offense but I think you have serious emotional issues/problems. The fact that you obsessed over this girl for months is strange. Also, it's fairly likely during your "relationship" she was still communicating often and probably hanging out with her ex.

Either way, it's extremely clear this girl isn't nearly as perfect as you make her out to be. Go see a shrink or something.

Dude, take it with a grain of salt but you need to stop being a pussy and move on.



the whole story makes you come off very beta. you seem very insecure of yourself.

Yeah, and it's probably obvious but if you ever want to get back with this ******ed girl for some reason, moping around all day watching TV and texting her/waiting for her to be done with her bf isn't the answer.

you seem to be leaving out the really juicy parts of the story. this girl seems to have something very very weird going on in her life

Did anything physical even happen in these six weeks?

See a therapist. Seriously.

yeah, you can't take this girl back if she ever actually does want you back. defines doormat. you should probably go bang prick's ex gf

A few scattered thoughts:

People who are healthy, happy, and independent have healthy relationships, and people who aren't do not. The intensity of your feelings isn't exactly a troubling fire, but it's a lot of smoke. It makes it seem like your life is out of balance.

Validating yourself or your happiness based on someone other than yourself or something other than what's inside you is fleeting and dangerous.

Agree with everyone else: you have blinders on about this girl. The way you skimmed past certain unfavorable parts about the situation or about her is a pretty strong indicator that there's something wrong that you're rationalizing subconsciously. Cognitive dissonance: I like this girl a lot; she may not be right for me or it may not be the right timing; she treats me like **** but I feel a high when I'm with her; I choose to ignore or explain away the screaming sirens that are all signaling GTFO.

It's okay to feel angry at the universe or at your lot in life, or at Prick, or at Krypto, or at God. You feel however you feel, and there's usually not much you can do about changing it. What you can do, however, is make a conscious choice to behave differently than how you feel. Your emotions will drive unhealthy behavior -- watch TV like a robot, obsessive fixation on her, absolute lovesickness -- but you have to know somewhere deep down inside that this is not the ideal you. The ideal you is a strong man who knows who he is, what he's worth, what he wants, and how others should treat him.

You can't control what others do to you or how they make you feel, but you can make small, everyday choices to be a better stronger person. Get off the couch and call a friend to go bowling. Clean your room up for 5 minutes and go to the gym. Pick up a book you've been meaning to read, or start a new hobby. There are other people in this world who are even more awesome than this girl -- go try to find them. Go try to find yourself! With practice and time, you will learn how to roll with the punches that girls (and life) throw at you. The habits that you reinforce daily are your armor against the vagaries of the day-to-day, emotional bull****. They are what allow us to shrug off those punches, and they will amplify the voice in your head that tells you that you are a healthy, independent person that people want to be around.

Yeah, you can't be friends with her. Not right now. It wouldn't be healthy for you. If she loved you for who you are, she wouldn't have done something to hurt you like this. If she somehow really loves you, then you're dealing with someone who's confused enough to hurt the people that they care about the most, and that's not someone that's ready for you or a healthy relationship. Not a coincidence that her friends aren't her friends anymore.

Would you be willing to be with her even though you knew it would never work out in the end? (It won't work out between you two, not in the position you're both at.) Would you do it just to make yourself feel better? I would rather be in a position where there's a non-zero chance that this could be a healthy relationship.

You're not crazy, man. You're just young and sensitive and you got hurt. That's making your world spin, which is why all of your questions show that you're walking without a compass. Take a deep breath, reorient yourself, acknowledge your feelings, and make choices that are healthier for you.

Just feels like I am piling on here, but phrasing it as you 'waited 5 years for THIS girl' is indicative of some really weird mindset in terms of how you view women/relationships imo.

edit - doing that at ANY age seems odd, but ESPECIALLY since you are 20 so we are discussing the 5 years between 15 and 20, when like 0.0001% of lasting relationships develop. You shouldn't have been concerned with that (I mean, most of us get in a relationship during that span and think it matters, but come around eventually - the fact that you are at the tail end of that age range and don't realize that it was the wrong thing to be doing is weird)

It sounds to me like you waited around forever cause you have super high standards and then you finally nabbed this perfect girl against all odds. This caused great bliss because you finally had something that you really wanted but was difficult to attain. Then this was suddenly ripped away from you, and what's worse, ripped away in such a way that you could make a direct negative comparison between yourself and someone else. That's going to be difficult to get over.

I think the weird part is not your interaction with this specific girl (it's totally natural to see your SO with rose colored glasses and gloss over the flaws) but your general philosophy towards finding a partner. To be fair, it's slightly similar to mine. I wouldn't say I have high standards for dating, but I do have high standards for dating a girl in what would be considered a normal, healthy relationship. Thus I wait around for a while waiting for someone that matches my specific tastes, and ofc it's frustrating when that eventually ends.

You can either lower your standards and try to learn to be content with someone that isn't so perfect, or you can get used to this cycle.

Jason, I was like you once, There was this girl when i was 16( my first gf) she was everything i wished for we dated for like 2 months then she left me to go back with her ex who was in prison the time we were dating, I also im very picky myself and ive met many other girls that met my standards but it just did not work. But you have to learn to move on, theres plenty more fish in the sea. You should try and be the prick in your TR and not be such a bitch when it comes to girls, This girl is young and she doesnt want a bitch boy to give her roses and tell her how much he loves her get some backbone dude.

and this.

wowzerz. first off i agree with everyone who responded. just to add i think what this guy went through is what every person who posts too much **** on facebook go through. humans rely on pretty basic instincts. wanting what you can't have, females wanting a strong (in more than one sense of the word) male, males wanting to spread their seed, and the whole concept of love being a very addictive feeling.

i think it's fair to assume the fact he got another gf drew the girl you liked back to him. now if you were to write up your perfect girl that you'll wait 5yrs to find will she have that personality trait?

another point of concern would be the lack of physical stuff that went down between you guys during these 6 weeks.

Yeah not sure if you mentioned what physical stuff happened, but if you didn't bang her in those 6 weeks then you didn't have a fighting chance really. You're supposed to replace the bond she had with her ex with your own bond.

The chances you get this girl back are pretty slim. Go out more, work more, be more productive with your day, etc. You'll feel better over time and before you know it, you're on to the next one

pues sighting!

KARAK STOP LOOKING AT DELETED POSTS

no u

yikyik.

Figure I'll give a tr of my week

After the fail night with the girl from my last tr, I had a very eventful week with a couple different girls. My good friend works as a lifeguard in our beachtown and during the day 2 girls who were from out of state (vermont) approach him asking if it's okay for them to to go topless on the beach. He tells them it's okay and chats with them long enough to exchange numbers and make plans to hang for the night. He tells me one is very hot and the other one is fat (when I meet both, the one girl is actually hot and the fat one isn't actually fat at all, just a meh face)

They come to my house and me, my lifeguard friend, and my other good friend come as well and we drink ourselves into a oblivion to the point where we all decide to go in my hottub(my home is pretty baller, more on that later)...since we didn't have bathing suits, everyone agrees to go naked. We play some stupid game where it's basically an excuse to hit on each other and eventually my friend dares them both to hook up with one of the guys at the same time. Clearly I run good irl so they pick me and i hook up with both of them for a good 2-3 minutes. Jesus these girls were looking for some d1ck.

I go inside to grab another beer and on my way out the hot one goes in as well and the chances I don't bang this girl on the spot is approximately 0%. We start hooking up and the other friends go to another part of the house to play other drinking games etc. We go back in my hottub and she climbs on top of my and I drunkingly bad idea start banging her (I will have herpes by the time I'm 21). I suggest we go upstairs to my room and I bang her for a good hour and I can honestly say i rocked this girls world, which I usually don't since admittedly I'm not great at sex. We come back downstairs after and hour, and my lifeguard friend is in another room with the other girl and my other friend was way to drunk and high and passed out somewhere else.

The next day they come again at night and we do basically the same thing except we're not naked or in the hottub. Easy game. Fun times to bang her again. My friend says he'll pay for my std screening too.

Next day my other good friend has a party and in the first time in forever I'm in someone else's house getting hammered, not mine. I invite a girl I've been good friends with forever and she bring's a cute blonde girl I've hooked up/got head from twice. I do my usual shotgun entire ****ty beer 12pack in an hour with my friend and kill like a pack of parliaments. Going to die young...

The blonde girl goes inside to go to the bathroom so I post up and wait for her inside as well. Once she gets out of the bathroom I approach, say some drunken pickupline/compliment I can't remember, hands on hips, and start hooking up with her. I made sure we went upstairs to my friends room and banged on his bed because he's done it to my a couple times. She's pretty meh in bed, probably because she rarely has sex despite being one of the cuter if not the best looking girls I've been with all summer. During this my friend walks in not knowing we were in there, laughs, and leaves. Owned.

Got this text the next day:
"Casually walked in on some of your doggystyle last night...nice form"

smalls is crushing it

Teach me your ways aces suited

Good work.

I especially like how you took the hot one despite your friend doing the initial work of getting them there.