Rebels Ruminations - Page 42 - The Lounge Discussion and Review on Literature, Arts, Culture

To avoid embarrassment it best not to let rip with an enormous, stinky fart and then have a very attractive woman come into the room to ask you a few work related questions.

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09-12-2021 , 12:30 PM

#1027

Rebelp

banned

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 3,773

In retrospect Nathan realised that having a fling with a Russian gangsters girlfriend was not his best idea.

Last edited by Rebelp; 09-12-2021 at 12:32 PM. Reason: Strengthened his sphincter muscles mind

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09-12-2021 , 01:01 PM

#1028

Rebelp

banned

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 3,773

When the lovely Andrea was pregnant she and her husband went out to buy a more practical car. They ended up buying a Morgan two seater.

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09-12-2021 , 03:25 PM

#1029

Rebelp

banned

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 3,773

Modesto memories
One chap I worked with said, with some frustration “Are there any ****ing strippers in this goddam town?”

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09-12-2021 , 05:57 PM

#1030

Rebelp

banned

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 3,773

Pasta factory. The boss there gave us a small packet of pasta as a thank you for our efforts. It was a bit of a squeeze to fit in, since the operators has loaded us up with a couple of hundredweight sacks beforehand.

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09-17-2021 , 06:02 PM

#1031

Rebelp

banned

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 3,773

Dominic is prick by the way. He ambits to sexually exploiting economically vulnerable young women and expects to be praised for this disgusting practice

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09-19-2021 , 03:43 AM

#1032

Rebelp

banned

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 3,773

Brother #2 at the doctors for his diabetic check up.
“While we are here one last thing, what is this lump on my elbow?”
Doc “It’s a lump on your elbow “

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09-19-2021 , 12:15 PM

#1033

Rebelp

banned

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 3,773

Because the weather in England is so pleasant at the moment the air is filled with the happy laughter of little children .The annoying little ****s.

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09-19-2021 , 01:25 PM

#1034

Rebelp

banned

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 3,773

Just to make it clear I’m not a Scientologist

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09-20-2021 , 06:10 AM

#1035

Rebelp

banned

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 3,773

There is a post “AA verses tight woman“,not going to go there.

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10-12-2021 , 01:43 AM

#1036

YESthisisJOHAN

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 35

RIP rebelp's 2p2 account, I hardly knew ya but liked reading your posts in the quitting alcohol thread...if you read this best of luck conquering your alcoholism

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01-18-2022 , 09:27 AM

#1037

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

My friend rebel has had the unusual experience of having an attractive young woman say to him:-

“Now this may sound weird, but could you clench your buttocks while I feel them?”

He reluctantly complied.

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01-19-2022 , 07:24 PM

#1038

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

Life tip from my friend Rebel:-

If you have a severe hangover, try not to work in a dog food factory the next day.
Actually, try not to work in a dog food factory at all, the delivery notices saying “Bulls thoraxes without lungs “alternated with “Bulls thoraxes with lungs” tend to put you off your food.

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01-22-2022 , 07:07 AM

#1039

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

Welsh girls:-

Probably equal with kind hearted Texan women in terms of the joy that they bring to the world, however one word of warning.

They all adore Tom Jones, if you make even a slightly disparaging remark about him they will make your life so miserable that not only will you wish that you had never been born you will wish that a universe that could contain such cruelty should never exist.

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01-25-2022 , 04:50 AM

#1040

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

Speaking of art, does anyone else think that the smile on the Mona Lisa has anything to do with her secretly pleasuring herself?

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01-27-2022 , 06:13 PM

#1041

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

Well even by his own very high standards my friend rebel has hit a profound point in his attempts to be the worlds stupidest person. After correctly deciding that the old fecal impaction was a problem that could no longer be ignored he checked into hospital where after undergoing a series of painful and embarrassing checks the doctors decided that it was indeed a life threatening condition. The bloody fool then decided to check himself out of the hospital due to his ridiculous addiction to alcohol.

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01-27-2022 , 06:35 PM

#1042

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

On the other hand the fact that an enormously inebriated young woman managed to avoid the cops who had been tasked with restraining her escape from the hospital on four consecutive occasions was fun to watch.

Last edited by notrebelatall; 01-27-2022 at 06:44 PM. Reason: For my friend rebel that is, I would not like to be confused with that banned poster

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01-27-2022 , 06:58 PM

#1043

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

Football games in the 1970s were rather rough occasions, but when my young brothers went to watch Liverpool play the guys fighting would stop to allow the kids to cross the road safely.

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01-28-2022 , 08:38 PM

#1044

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

To add to the joy that my friend rebels stupidity try's to bring to the world I can inform you that whilst bathing this morning he realised that he still had a cannula inserted into his arm. I think that having a large object inserted into ones arm and then forgetting about it qualifies quite highly on the “I may be daft ,but I’m not that daft” scale

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01-30-2022 , 02:48 AM

#1045

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

The Sunderland Brewery Vaux once ran a promotion where they sold beer in two pint glasses using the slogan “Are you man enough to handle it?”
Not sure if that would run in today’s times.

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01-30-2022 , 03:44 AM

#1046

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

I can remember the exact time in my life when the realisation that we are all doomed to eternal oblivion stopped being a source of fear and became a source of comfort instead.

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01-30-2022 , 04:36 AM

#1047

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

During his hospital visit my friend rebel had the experience of a very good looking young man delving into his lower area, giving a squeeze and telling his colleague “Testicals are fine.”

I don’t think that he has ever had a greater compliment in his life.

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01-30-2022 , 05:26 AM

#1048

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

Talking about useless abilities I am capable of attracting many beautiful women who have no interest in sexual intercourse with me.

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01-30-2022 , 10:00 PM

#1049

Dominic

Tripod

Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 74,263

lol might as well just post your thoughts in a notebook, Dude.

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01-31-2022 , 05:27 AM

#1050

notrebelatall

banned

Join Date: Oct 2021 Posts: 485

I am perfectly well enough to post my notes anywhere that I wish.

Unless you are under the age of fifteen I would suggest that you don’t use the word “Dude”

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