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08-01-2021 , 06:49 AM
#926
Rebelp
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For those people who think that I am full of myself, what the heck do you think that I should be full of , chocolate maybe?
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08-01-2021 , 01:27 PM
#927
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Apparently Dominic gets bugged by my harmless , if stupid, internet posts. Meanwhile the grown ups in the room have to put up with being bugged by the CIA.
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08-01-2021 , 01:39 PM
#928
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Looking back on my warnings John warned me for posting “Overtly sexual content “ what does he want me to do? Post covertly sexual content? Seems a bit creepy to me
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08-01-2021 , 01:46 PM
#929
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To put this stuff in context, I did have to witness an inconsolable young woman weeping uncontrollably when she was informed that she was going to miscarry her baby.
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08-01-2021 , 05:23 PM
#930
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My girl died of ovarian cancer, if you mention this to any British medical professional they will just reply “The silent killer eh?”
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08-02-2021 , 02:12 AM
#931
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I would never deliberately offend anyone, except Dominic who I would refer to as “An utterly useless wanker”
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08-02-2021 , 10:50 AM
#932
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Racists can really just go and **** themselves, nobody else will.
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08-02-2021 , 02:18 PM
#933
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Wendy did let me in and be her friend, but I should not have done that, since her boyfriend was my best mate.But beautiful blonde girls are a bit hard to resist
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08-02-2021 , 06:18 PM
#934
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Wendy was not only physically gorgeous but also had a stupendous amount of emotional intelligence, and her mum was a barmaid
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08-02-2021 , 11:11 PM
#935
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I would like to say that that I apologise to anyone that I have offended, but I won’t knowing that offending people is one of my greatest pleasures
Last edited by Rebelp; 08-02-2021 at 11:16 PM.
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08-03-2021 , 11:31 PM
#936
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Bad days really don’t come much worse than the one that the man who I shared an hospital ward with today. He suffered a cardiac arrest while driving, lost control of the car and had a horrible crash. The poor bugger has also lived in Wigan for all his life
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08-04-2021 , 03:08 AM
#937
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My recent medical adventure did give me the chance to discuss my bowels with an extremely beautiful young woman, things only started to go wrong when she inserted her finger into my anus and said “ we will try an enema, but there is a good chance that you will need manual evacuation “
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08-04-2021 , 07:54 AM
#938
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I would never simplify things to the extent of just grading human beauty in terms
of numbers, (“A solid 8” and so on) I use actual words like “A lovely bit of stuff “
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08-04-2021 , 02:41 PM
#939
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When Wendy let me in and let her be her friend, I don’t think that me guarding her dreams and visions was the first thing on our minds
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08-05-2021 , 12:09 PM
#940
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I did see that the cigarette company mentioned that smoking clogs hardens your arteries, but why should I consume footwear?
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08-05-2021 , 06:23 PM
#941
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Let’s have a little think

Cricket is the greatest sport ever.

Young women running around sweating their arses off are also one of greatest things ever
Therefore women's cricket is the greatest thing to ever exist
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08-06-2021 , 07:10 PM
#942
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Zoe has one of those things in her head(brains)Normally she would treat people quite harshly but with a sense of fun, but when she first met me she realised that my my mind was not quite up to that and talked to me very kindly . She also made the greatest joke about anal sex that anyone has ever made
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08-07-2021 , 12:56 AM
#943
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Bit of wordplay
I have an habit of apologising for my stupidity so when the nurse told me to stop it and said “ I’m not here to judge people “ I replied “Fair enough , unless you are a Judge because that would mean that you are being overpaid for your job “
When the beautiful young woman said “We need to get to the bottom of your problem “ I could not reply
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08-07-2021 , 02:48 AM
#944
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The nurse who quite correctly informed me that I should stop drinking did it out of a sense of compassion ,he would also make any other man run out of the room in terror.
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08-08-2021 , 01:30 PM
#945
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The doctor was the most beautiful woman that I ever seen. The girl who recently delivered cider to me was the second best, and she didn’t stick her finger up my bum , so close run thing
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08-08-2021 , 11:57 PM
#946
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Thinking about, it the last comment could go different ways
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08-09-2021 , 05:35 AM
#947
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Cider girl update. I phoned the company up and thanked them for their service and mentioned how lovely the delivery driver was and the boss just said “ Thanks mate, she’s my missus “
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08-09-2021 , 06:55 AM
#948
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One of the girls in the office said about Steve “ He’s big but harmless “ Since he had once told me that seeing someone being kicked to the ground and beaten was “As funny as ****” I doubt the “harmless” part of the statement
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08-09-2021 , 07:00 AM
#949
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He also became distracted after one of his drug dealer friends was thrown from an hotel bedroom to his death
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08-09-2021 , 07:09 AM
#950
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After three years he fessed up to his girl that her sympathy for the car crash injuries that he and his friends had suffered my have been misplaced, because they were actually caused by drunken violent interaction with physically superior fighters.
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