Thanks

You seem to want autism. Yes all the best SUB.

I dunno how to tactfully bring this up without sounding dickish but whatever:

Is there any debate as to whether the autism "spectrum" is actually a thing in the psych/med community?

Drawing from personal experience I have seen a lot of parents label their children "autistic" who I think are just a little quirky, goofy, or even just plain undisciplined.

On the other hand, one of my best friends growing up had an autistic family member who was without a doubt definitely autistic. Very uncommunicative, never made eye contact, when they did speak it was clear it was very difficult as if almost physically painful etc. I guess because I compare most cases of autism to that person I often get skeptical about how frequently Autism diagnoses seem to come up in recent times.

I understand the concept of the "spectrum", but I can't help but wonder if it's a bit overdiagnosed regardless. To be clear, I'm not saying autism isn't a thing, I just feel like other un-specified social difficulties get lumped into the autism umbrella when they don't necessarily belong there.

I don't think there's any debate as to whether or not ASD is a valid or real diagnosis.

As awareness of it has increased over the last couple of decades, there have probably been some people incorrectly diagnosed, sure. Unlike something with blood tests to confirm, there are always potential errors when you are essentially using a check list of symptoms, particularly when (as is often the case with children) you are getting second hard reports of behavior from parents and teachers rather than a description of what the actual client is thinking/feeling.

That said, I don't personally have doubts that ASD does run the gamut from severely disabled to "high functioning". Those on the higher end of the spectrum tend to not have the severe language and social functioning symptoms that people sometimes think of when they hear "autistic", but that doesn't negate their own experience of their symptoms.

I think the best current understanding is that it is primarily a change in the brain's ability to process certain types of information. For example, people on the spectrum often have great difficulty tuning out background noise. If you are "normal" you don't really think about this, you can just do it - you can focus on the person talking in front of you and tune out the traffic, other voices, and various other noises that are occurring in that moment. Someone with ASD may literally not be able to do that - that part of their brain simply doesn't function the same way.

It's just a variance in brain processing that makes people with ASD quite literally experience the world differently (and with a fairly wide range of how severe that difference is) than other people. There are benefits to this as well in certain areas, but people tend to think of the deficits.

Personally I think the spectrum is a great idea.

For the human body, I think hard-and-fast categories are artificial in most cases, not just for autism, but for things like bodyweight i.e. normal/overweight/obese. The truth is that most people would benefit health-wise from losing weight, even those in the "normal" category. Instead people can say "Well I have a few extra pounds but at least I'm not overweight" or "Yeah, I'm overweight, but at least I'm not obese". Like somehow there's a switch inside your body that magically gets thrown because of your spot on some chart.

Similarly, if somebody has certain characteristics of autism, but can still function to some extent, I say that health care professionals should recognize that fact and treat it appropriately, if possible. So what if somebody claims it's not "real" autism.

It sucks that slipslope is ****ting all over this thread; I think it's an interesting topic. Pretty rare that people are willing to admit to something that obviously has a stigma attached to it. It would be a shame for OOTards to drive this topic into the ground.

I have an acquaintance with at least one child (maybe a second) who has been diagnosed as autistic. I'm very curious about it, but don't feel comfortable talking about it with him.

too eazy,

I don't think it's dickish at all to ask those kinds of questions. Actually, I'm happy you did.

Props to SGT and Busto for basically taking the words out of my mouth.

Half of 2+2 is somewhere in the autistic spectrum. I have in RL a very good friend, who has been officially diagnosed.

I mean you have to deal with it. You know that your brain functions certain way, like you like routines and have social difficulties. It is very well possible to organize everything the way, that you will feel good.

This friend of mine is also high functioning, has a job, but just says sometimes things, which are really offensive, or really really sweet, and he doesn't get, why some things result in good and other in totally bad reaction from people. And he can't keep eye contact. I remember, that I noticed that with eye contact, and wanted to ask him, if he thought about autism, but then didn't know how to do it. He is really good friend. Helped me A LOT when I had depression. And it is somehow so, that when I have some big dramatic problem, I skype to him about it, and then it is basically always, that he says something, what makes the problem immediately smaller.

With your indifferent friends. I think that indifferent is pretty normal reaction. What reaction had you expected? I would really not measure friends based on that.

As I've shared before, I'm a high functioning Aspey, but I never apologize for the way I think. As a child, I had to isolate myself several times a day with music in a dark room and rock back and forth until my thinking became calmer.

I still have difficulty listening to music in a car, because I get lost and my friends tease me because I have extreme difficulty not being brutally honest when someone asks me a question.

Drinking brought me out of my shell, but eventually that turned on me and I quit when I realized I didn't really need it anymore. Most people think that I am completely illogical, but the truth is I have my own logic that works well for me. It helps that I made it to eccentric and don't have to be weird anymore.

Good luck Bob! I wouldn't choose any other way to think!

I actually think it's easier to chat about this here than doing so face-to-face.

In terms of telling my friends about it, I told them because I figured that their responses would be more tolerant and understanding. Plus, they're my friends and they should know. I was wrong, but at least it wasn't that bad.

This is probably true, or at least not much of an exaggeration. Even those who aren't are still going to be a bit off. You don't get a 5 figure post count on an internet forum about a card game without having a least a few social and cognitive eccentricities.

That was a weird move. Don't understand that at all.

slipslope should be banned for his posts itt. Was this moved from OOT or something? Figures. The mods there suck but the Lounge mods are better and shouldn't let his posting go unpunished.

I applaud SUB for "coming out" about this. People who voluntarily try to educate others about life eccentricities should be welcomed not made to feel bad, or like they are seeking attention. I also feel like a dick now for some of the ways I've treated SUB in the past, as well as another SE reg who recently revealed his Aspergers. I'm 36 and I'm slowly starting to think more sensitively about people around me.

SUB your friends probably acted indifferent because either they have little idea of ASD, or they do and they either already painted you for that, or they just don't care since it doesn't technically change how the two of you should expect to interact moving forward.

I asked for it to be moved. Timeline was this:

1. I post thread
2. Minutes after posting, I ask mods to move it to TLDR figuring that trolls would be more likely to try and derail my thread in OOT.
3. That was confirmed when slipslope started posting there
4. I complained about said trolling
5. Thread was moved

Probably will get less responses. But I think that less can be more.

The latter response was exactly what I expected trolls to say because it appears to be a common negative response to claiming that you have a mental disorder. I believe people say that because many mental disorders cannot be seen immediately. If I have a broken leg and I'm wearing a cast, then nobody is going to question whether or not I'm lying when I tell them that I can't help them carry anything. If I tell somebody that I can't lift anything heavy because I strained a back muscle, a skeptical person might think I'm just saying that to avoid helping somebody lift furniture because there's no physical evidence to show that I have a strained muscle.

Honestly, there are times where I act normal (or what I perceive to be normal) and you wouldn't know that I had any problem at all. But if you were my roommate, you would see what I'm like in more intimate details and realize that yeah, something is messed up.

If you saw me as a child, you wouldn't need to see me to know something was up with me. When I was a child, I had difficulty speaking. I used to just repeat verbatim what another person would ask me before answering the question. As a matter of fact, it's something that I still occasionally do though it's not as bad as it once was because I adjust for grammar when responding.

Person: SUB, how are you doing?
Me: How am I doing? [short pause] Oh! I'm fine. You?

I also used to ramble when being asked just as simple question. I would make connections that others would not see. Again, it's something I still do but it isn't quite as bad as the transitions between topics are more sensible than in the past. Example:

As a child:

Person: What's your favorite fruit?
SUB: I like green apples. The Jets are playing the Seahawks.

You can tell what the connection is when it is in writing (the color). When in conversation, you would probably do a bit of a double take and be confused by that kind of response.

As an adult:

Person: What's your favorite fruit?
Me: I like green apples. They taste a bit tart but that's what makes them so good. Used to eat them a lot when I was a kid. Though to be fair, I was more fond of bananas than apples when I was younger.

Still can't stay on topic but at least the transition is more logical.

The last thing I want is to have people walk on eggshells when I'm around. Unfortunately, that may just be the immediate response to my condition if I told a person at the wrong place/time.

I guess revealing my condition can be a lose-lose situation. Either I don't tell them my condition and they think I'm a weirdo or I tell them and while it explains my behavior, they don't know how to adjust their own behavior and it creates a different uncomfortable situation because of their lack of knowledge. Mostt people perceive autistic people as minimally functional whereas I am not. When they hear that I am autistic, it changes their perspective on what it means to be autistic.

It's hard to say "approach all people with ASDs [this way]" because the sheer diversity of both the people who have it and their exact symptoms is too complex for generalizations. Even among classifications, there can be significant differences between patients. In that matter, I can really only speak for myself.

Yeah, that's what I figured after staying up and thinking about it some more.

I disagree. I think there are possible downsides to revealing, of course. But I think there are possible upsides, too - aren't friendships sometimes developed and made deeper by sharing personal information like this?

Hey dude good on ya for sharing. That would not be easy at all.

All the best man!

When I post on the internet, I often find myself at a disadvantage. I miss the intended sarcasm, for example. I don't get it that someone was attempting to be humorous. Or that someone was hurt or angered by a comment.

It creates confusion and discomfort, because I don't have the advantage of reading facial expressions, or tone of voice, or body language. Is this similar to how you feel when communicating in general?

Oh, the irony!

Absolutely stunning.

Diagnosis confirmed.

Wise choice. Not that there is anything wrong with falling in love with someone you suspect is an escort and feeling confident that you are about to marry her even though she won't sleep with you or have much of anything to do with you.

In light of revelations itt, that thread should probably be re-titled to include the word "stalking."

Bipoar is by far the best lifestyle though.

Good luck, SUBob. I don't think your friends care one way or another. They are your friends, regardless of your diagnosis. Just like on 2+2.

I dunno... all that travel back and forth from Santa's workshop to Antarctica might be a little taxing.

JFC you guys are making me pissed at myself for responding to that mother****er.

Have long replies for later. Barca vs PSG now

Sent from my SM-G530FZ using 2+2 Forums

I'm talking if/when people who are merely acquaintances find out.

Thanks. Honestly, it's actually been pretty therapeutic to share this.

It's a good analogy as that's a very common issue when I'm conversing with people, even with people who I am friends with.

I used to be very blunt and direct with my comments. You know the things that people think but don't say? Yeah, I would say them then be confused as to why that person would be offended. I was just being honest which I always considered the right thing to do. Had to learn that it's okay to bull**** people and probably recommended in some situations (such as when your grandma is dying and you say she is looking well).

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww <3<3

I'd guess that a large number of regs on 2p2 are somewhere on the spectrum. Never been diagnosed, but I might bet a bit spergy myself.