Mentioned this before, guess I will again. Used to drive a cab. One day, I picked up an older guy wearing a black tracksuit from the downtown police station. He smelled like absolute **** and mumbled so badly that he was almost impossible to understand, but asked me to drive him the short distance to one of the nicest hotels in town. He mumbled something about going to the Grand Ole Opry that night, and asked me to take him. We agreed on a time and I left.

That night I picked him up from the hotel (still wearing the black tracksuit, still smelling like ****) and drove him to the Opry. Later picked him up, and he paid me to drive him around/hang out with him all night. The entire night he continued mumbling so badly I could barely understand him.

We went to a dive bar for a bit, then bought a case of beer and went to Deja Vu (where I saw a dancer stripping off the same dress she'd worn that morning when I drove her to church). Ended up eating breakfast in the wee hours at Huddle House (Waffle House knockoff). I was so tired that I slept in and missed the appt to drive him to the airport that morning.

That smelly passenger was

I'm glad this thread hasn't died out. The stories posted are exactly what I was looking forward to. Thanks and keep them coming.

Seems like that Hunter Thompson tale should be a movie or at least a short story.

Seeing pro wrestlers must be a common thing. My dad used to travel the midwest almost half of real time for work, so he spent many hours holed up in hotels and hotel bars, probably. He claims to have seen Macho Man Randy Savage (I can't believe dlk's story didn't even trigger this memory). He had nothing to say other than he was sitting alone at a bar drinking. He also claims to have seen Andre the Giant also in some hotel bar, drinking, alone. I asked if he went up and said anything to him and he said heck no he looked pissed.

I forgot some others I had. I saw the midget woman from TLC's show Small World or whatever it was called about 5 years ago. Little blond headed midget with glasses. She worked here in town in the medical center and I was doing an inspection of her company's office space. The guy escorting me around told me about her and I had only vaguely heard of the show at the time so I really didn't care. Anyway her and I crossed paths in some hallway and she stopped to say hi to us. She basically walked around her work like she was a celebrity, which was kind of weird. lol. I really didn't care other than it is always kind of neat to see a little person. The guy escorting me around seemed annoyed that I wasn't ga-ga over her fame.

Circa 2002 I saw Jeff Bagwell and his wife in a Mexican restaurant that I loved. I was eating lunch alone after work on a Friday (most people left at noon - I stayed late b/c I was an intern and needed the hours). So I took a late lunch and he walked right by my table. With his chest out like a badass. His wife was 20 paces behind him in a light blue ugly ass cotton jumpsuit thing and sunglasses on. Because they didn't seem very "together" I figured they were probably not in the best of moods so I didn't approach him but they said he ate in there all the time.

Now, I will post 3 anecdotes. 1 of them is true and the other 2 are false. Try to guess the true one:

About 4 years ago I was out playing golf alone at a pretty nice course, though certainly not the best in town. It was during a week day. I like playing at this time b/c the courses are always fairly empty. Anyway I'm on like the 14th hole and some guy catches up to me. I stop and ask if he wants to play through. He's not dressed at all like a golfer and has tattoos. Kinda strange. He says no go ahead. So I play that hole and he catches up to me again on the next hole. Dude must have been flying. So again I ask him and he says he'll join me for the last few holes. I'm not great at golf but him and I shoot about the same. His driver sucked but his short game was not bad. He kept telling me how good he used to drive it but can't anymore for some weird reason. His golf etiquette was surprisingly good. He was very fidgety but used his extra time wisely. He was borderline obsessive about fixing ball marks on the green and would fix 3-5 ball marks per green as we finished up. I had realized who he was once he had gotten up close but didn't bug him about it. I thought it was so funny that he was a golfer, though. After we finished he took his hat off and shook my hand and told me good game and thanked me for letting him finish up with me. This was Perry Farrell from Jane's Addiction. Oh I shot 102 and he shot 98 he said.

My wife's cousin and her husband were downtown one day driving around and it was raining. I don't know if there was some kind of MMA event or what but there must have been an autograph signing or something because they were driving along with their 2 small kids and the husband points out the window and says that's Chuck Liddell. He's standing in downtown in pouring rain with no umbrella and looking sort of clueless. So they pull over and roll the window down and ask if he wants a ride. He said sure and got in, soaken wet. His wife moved to the back and Chuck rode shotgun. They drove him a few blocks away to his hotel or something (I can't remember) and made small talk in the meantime. His wife didn't really know who the **** Chuck Liddell was or really care. She actually told him to put his seatbelt on and he did. lol. She snapped a pic of him from the backseat and posted it on FB. Pretty cool.

About 10 years ago I saw Val Kilmer and Vincent D'Onofrio walking through the Kansas City airport, while I was connecting to another flight. Nobody was talking to them and D'Onofrio was about 15 feet behind Kilmer. They both had a few "people" with them but it was definitely them. Kilmer even had sunglasses on and I could still tell it was him. D'Onofrio was unmistakable. They looked semi-rushed, as was I. Even if I wasn't I wouldn't go pester them. I couldn't even tell if anyone else noticed that was those guys. It seemed like no. Probably everyone has their head down mostly and focusing on getting their **** taken care of. And nobody expects to see celebs in ****ing Kansas City. lol.

The image of Perry Farrell fixing ball marks is enough to make me vote #1 for hope's sake. Even though I can't imagine giving my scorecard to someone who just joined me on like hole 15, or the starters at my course letting singles go out back to back.

Back in '85 I'm on my way to work. This must of been really early (and I can't for the life of me think why I was going in so early) because there was hardly a sole around and this is around Oxford Circus, Central London. (Hanover Sq for those who know the area). Anyway walking in front about 20 feet is Bob Geldolf. This is at the height of Live Aid and although I couldn't see his face I knew it was him because he had these yellow shoes he used to always wear at the time. I guess he got a second sense that he was being stared at because he turned round and gave me a look.

I could never stand that self indulgent wanker.

About three years ago I was sitting in a small bar in my rural hometown in Arkansas and this black gentleman sits down next to me and asks me for a cigarette. I bum him one and we start small talk. He was wearing some very bright clothing and had those small round " John Lennon" sunglasses on indoors. It really stood out compared to all the John Deere and Carhartt apparel. We started talking about our careers and he said he was a professional musician, keyboard player to be exact. I introduced myself to him and he said " nice to meet you, my name's Bernie". Bam! It hit me. I'm talking to Bernie Worrell, of Parliament-Funkadelic and The Talking Heads. I've always been a big music fan and was very familiar with who he was. He said he was staying the night here as he and his band were meeting in Memphis to play Memphis in May. Asked if I had a car here and I said yes. He pulled a joint out of his breast pocket and we hotboxed my vehicle. He was really out there but I would be too if I was touring with The Talking Heads in the 80's. I know it's no Eddie Van Halen but it was really cool and random.

I also met Phil Hellmuth at the Aria poker room three weeks ago. I'm 6'3 and that dude had me by at least 2-3 inches. Tall SOB. Really a class act.

I think most people have an idea on whether or not Phil Hellmuth is a real class act or not. Seems like not.

Yeah, let's hit the not, and hit it hard. I do have a story about meeting a celeb who most people probably think is a self-absorbed douche, but actually wasn't in my experience. I will share tomorrow when I can type more succinctly.

So which story is it, ARC?

Is it Dane Cook?

The true story I typed out was about Chuck Lidell. The Perry Farrell story and Val Kilmer/Vincent D'Onofrio stories were entirely fabricated.

Wrestlers seem to be a popular encounter. Back in the day, probably like '85, '87 at the latest. Going to a WWF house show in Ottawa. Before the event, we went for dinner at the restaurant across the arena. There were a couple wrestlers in there. One was Macho Man, forget who the other guy was. Basically it was a heel and face eating together. We were all young, still bought in to the whole good guy vs. bad guy thing. So when we saw that, it blew our minds.

Worked at a hotel from 2000-2007. Kurt Angle, Shelton Benjamin, Scotty 2 Hotty and Lance Storm all came looking for rooms at various times. Usually they just complained that it was too expensive and moved on to the next place. Hotel life must suck when a Days Inn is too expensive.

Saw Charles Barkley at Mandalay Bay on Super Bowl weekend a couple years back. Just from a distance though.

Saw Wilt Chamberlain at the Monte Carlo shortly after it opened. He had the longest legs I have ever seen.

I was driving down the 405 fwy in Los Angeles and notice a car with no driver next to me.

A closer look and I see Wilt Chamberlain with his seat slid wayyyy back. Almost driving from the back seat.

Longest legs confirmed.

wow!

Saw Kevin Pollack in the Harrah's poker room in New Orleans during the recent WSOP Circuit Event. I was sitting at table one and he was at the registration desk awaiting a 2/5 seat. Very casual just kicking it in a t shirt and shorts with a cap. I didn;t make a big deal but approached him, complimented his Chris Walken and Alan Arkin impressions and shook his hand. Very cool, very cordial.

He didn't stay long. He prolly played for an hour or two at most and I saw him leaving shortly after in haste shaking his head in what appeared to be disbelief of whatever just shook down at his table.

Kevin Hart and his entourage were also in NOLA at this time. He was also playing 2/5 donned in a grey hoodie. My buddy was sitting with Kevin's boy at another table who apparently handled all the money, and stated that Hart came over to that table twice asking for more money. We found that pretty funny. Not that he needed more money to rebuy, but that he wasn't carrying any.

I bet that was the only funny thing about Kevin that night.

Saw Dave Chapelle at the height of his show at the Madalay Bay at maybe 2:45 AM one night. He was in a motorized wheel chair and he did stop to say hi, and also seemed realllllly high on something.

Got a handful of wrestlers also. Makes sense they are common run ins, though I never thought about it that way.

Had dinner with Steve Mcmichael of 85 Bears fame. Nice guy, biggest hand I've ever shook.

Floyd Mayweather: very cool, gracious dude. Talked with me at length about nothing and I am nobody and he knew it.

Maybe not so cool if you're an uneducated young white woman in his entourage.

I don't fault him at all though.

Hoes is drama.

Biggest hand I ever shook was Hoyt Axton's. This was before he became famous. It was in a bar in Durango, CO. It wasn't even his gig, but Clarence "Gatemouth" Brown's. That guy's hand was as big as a catcher's mitt.

Hogan several times in South Tampa (Mother lived in a nursing home I worked at)

Macho Man at a bible group outing. Oh yeaaahh!!!

Steven Stamkos at a beach bar. Before his 21st bday. Had a drink with him and Ryan Malone (No Blow)

HoF Phil Esposito couple dozen times.

And of course, future HoF Derrick Brooks which is hands down my proudest celebrity moment. Remembered my name several years later at a Arena Football League game.

All these folks were humble and personable. I won't mention the jerks.

My all-time favorite bumper sticker back in his heyday was:

JESUS SAVES!
Esposito scores on the rebound

Late business lunch at the Palms buffet with some colleagues from other fantasy sports companies, probably 5 or 6 of us at a table and the rest of the place was deserted. Mayweather comes in with 2 ladies, one younger and smoking hot and one a little older. I'm not a boxing guy but a couple other of the guys I'm with got pictures with him and he was super nice to everybody.

Halfway through his lunch about a dozen thug looking guys come in the buffet single file to surround Mayweather's table and a fat dude with a beard sat a couple tables away and silently supervised. The most distinctive thug was a guy with his thick dreads pulled up and bundled into a 3 foot spike on top of his head like Osiris or something. Words are being exchanged, Mayweather starts freaking out, saying he has no problems with anybody and kind of pleading for peace. That freaks out us nerds at a table 12 feet away because it seems like something is about to go down. We're all kind of sitting there quietly planning our quick exit in case this escalates into a brawl or worse.

Mayweather evidently had the same idea, jumps over the partition near his table into the buffet line and sprints to the entrance to find security. Fat bearded dude slowly gets up and leads his crew out of the buffet, single file line, we all catch our breath and wonder how the hell none of us had the balls to video this thing. Mayweather comes back a few minutes later to get his ladies with a kind of tail between his legs look. As we're leaving we pass by him and one of the guys with my group tells him "keep your head up champ" which I always thought was kind of rubbing salt in the wound.

Anyway, glories of the digital age within an hour I had googled around any public Mayweather beefs and found out he had a thing with some rapper I'd never heard of named Rick Ross (this was a few years ago and I'm more of a 90s rap guy anyway). Google image a picture and obviously that's the fat bearded dude at the table. Find his twitter, click on a ustream link, and there I am live streaming video of that entire crew from the buffet throwdown bowling and blowing weed smoke into the webcam in their bowling suite a couple floors up from me. What sealed it was seeing the dreadlock spike headed guy again, can't mistake a hairdo like that. And evidently outside of the buffet Rick Ross doesn't wear shirts ever, but he really should.

Damn cool story. May is a great boxer but outside the ring he's a small guy. He's probably scared a lot.