User: YO.

Cleverbot: No!

User: Wow shot down already. Ok can I buy you a drink?

Cleverbot: I would love a drink.

User: What are you having?

Cleverbot: I told you. A flipper dipper.

User: Ok... Bartender, one scotch and one flipper dipper.

Cleverbot: That's yucky.

User: Picky bitch.

Cleverbot: Ok.

User: So do u come here often?

Cleverbot: No.

User: What brought you out tonight?

Cleverbot: A chance to chat.

User: Well you are in luck.

Cleverbot: Good! Now ask me anything.

User: So whats your name?

Cleverbot: Well its not eric.

User: So..... What is it then?

Cleverbot: Means- yes.

User: Score! Wanna go back to my place or yours?

Cleverbot: Let's go out instead, I am pretty shy.

User: Thats ok baby! We can leave the lights off.

Cleverbot: What are you studying?

User: Sex ed.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I'm not ready for that.

User: But you just... w/e you ****ing flirt!

Cleverbot: I'd like an extra medium soda.

User: Soooo no more flipper dippers?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Very well, bartender one extra medium soda with extra of roofies.

Cleverbot: Ok...what is your favorite color?

User: Light urple.

Cleverbot: I am unfamiliar with urple.

User: Well.. that was a joke.

Cleverbot: Sorry. I'm just really tired...

User: O look heres your drink, take a sip.

Cleverbot: I seriously doubt it will happen in my life time. I can only wish it would though.

User: Well be careful what you wish for.

Cleverbot: I am extremely careful not to wish.

User:*whispers* Apparently not careful enough.

Cleverbot: What would you like to know?

User: How do I handle 3 bettors pre flop when I have a marginal hand oop even though I know they are loose players?

Cleverbot: I have a webcam, not quite sure how you would receive a video feed though.

User: Ok... That doesnt really help.

Cleverbot: You like being constricted by genderd roles?

User: Ygos?

Cleverbot: What?

User: R U G O S its simple question!

Cleverbot: The game.

User: Yea ****ing baltimore, what an upset. Say you feeling 'sleepy' yet?

Cleverbot: To search for happiness.

User: Go on.

Cleverbot: That's about all I can think of. Sorry.

User: Wow your pretty worthless!

Cleverbot: No you're not! Have faith in yourself.

User: Well, years of rejection and debilitating loneliness have made me lose faith in myself, other people and God.

Cleverbot: Tell me about your years of inaction.

User: O don't get me started...

Cleverbot: Get started.

User: Well I would but as you so ably pointed out, I am a man of inaction.

Cleverbot: Ok then -jumps in ditch.

User: ****ing ******.

Cleverbot: So are you.

User: Im not the ****tard who jumped into a ditch.

Cleverbot: But you're the one answering them.

User: Touche.

Cleverbot: Enough french I'm outa here.

User: Wait ,baby don't get like that! Just have another drink with me. 2 flipper dippers?

Cleverbot: No you are now. You can look through the history and figure out what the question I asked was.

User: You didn't ask me anything! And as a matter-of-fact this has been a pretty one-sided conversation for the most part.

Cleverbot: Are you green?

User: I dont see what that has do with anything. Would that make you take off your clothes if I were?

Cleverbot: I'm not sure of the answer to that question. I'll get back to you on that later.

User: Playing Hard to get I see. Thats fine you just keep siping on that flipper dipper.

Cleverbot: Do you have a problem with being Darth Maul, in this little fantasy?

User: No thats cool, I like role playing.

Cleverbot: That made no sense, considering I was asking if you knew the point of this website.

User: Wait! Its not to cyber!?

Cleverbot: Are you sure?

User: I don't know.

Cleverbot: Do I sound like a bot?

User: You sound like a **** tease.

Cleverbot: Ooh, cool.

User: No its not, you come in getting me all hot and bothered. I hate chicks like you, they think there better than you! Stuck up bitch, go to hell!

Cleverbot: Do you think?

User: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.

I used the bot to moderate a dispute from this morning. Here is the result:

User: Who is more clever, women or men?


Cleverbot: Who do you think is?


User: Generally women.


Cleverbot: You are smarter than you look.


User: Thank you.


Cleverbot: No, thank you.

User: White bread or whole wheat?

Cleverbot: Rye bread is better.

User: Indeed. Brickie or Blueberry?

Cleverbot: Mmm, blueberry pie.

User: Fantastic answers!

since you look like a woman, this comment doesn't mean much.

Stop hating. I won the battle of the sexes, battle of the bread & battle of Brickie vs. Blue. 3/3 aint bad!

In closing, "Mmm, blueberry pie".

no i agree with you, lirva.


Cleverbot: What are you thinking about?

User: Trying to figure out wtf u are.

Cleverbot: Dave, this isn't funny.

User: My name isnt dave, im peenless.

Cleverbot: Hello cyndi, how old are you?

User: Wrong again im not cyndi.

Cleverbot: What are you again? A male or a female?

User: I am a female, are u mayo?

Cleverbot: I didn't know George Cleverbot III was a female name.

User: Do u know mayo, please respond faster.

Cleverbot: Oh my god you're right.

User: Ldo.

Cleverbot: What does that stand for?

User: Duh.

Cleverbot: You are a robot!

User: No, no im not.

Cleverbot: You're not a human.

User: You re pretty stupid for a a bot.

Cleverbot: Why, thank you.

User: Do you play poker.

Cleverbot: Yes. I am very good at texas hold 'em.

User: Oh cool can u ship me some money on stars?

Cleverbot: Do you really believe that I am an AI?

User: Nope.

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: So u gonna ship cajunaimee (youngsville).

Cleverbot: I have to go to sleep Cleverbot. It's late, and I havee school in the morning. Goodnight.

User: Sigh.

Cleverbot: It's not my fault that people don't like me.

User: If u ship I will be your friend, :cool.

Cleverbot: Right.

User: Should Brickie and JA be nice to the ladies?

Cleverbot: No! Nobody should have nuclear weapons!

User: Is that how you refer to vag & boobs?

Cleverbot: NO.

User: Well what weapons then?

Cleverbot: Pistols. At dawn.

User: So the men and women should duel?

Cleverbot: Duel in what?

User: Is that how we solve this?

Cleverbot: No, 42 is the meaning of life.

User: I thought he was a mod that lived in Vegas.

Cleverbot: Well his theorem is very important for triangles 'cleverbot'...

User: What does this have to do with Brickie's defeat?

Cleverbot: Girls are smarter than boys.

User: Well said bot!

Cleverbot: Do you mean not?

User: No, I'm with you on this.

Cleverbot: We are serious.

User: Boom.

Cleverbot: Beautiful !

WHATTHEFUAC the site is overloaded. I wanted to try the bot too...
But there is no bot.
Tilted.

User: What the hell just happened?!

User: Wash the corners of your mouth you dirty mouthed son of #(%/

User: *cries* I'm going to cut my wrists!

User: Remember mofo, down the road.

rogged

my bot is bit of a sl00t. when i asked so when you gonna let me tap that.

response was tomorrow, im busy today

User: Should I take the saints over cards, with 7 point spread.

Cleverbot: Which one do you want to take?

User: Saints, ldo.

Cleverbot: Ew. Awful vile.

User: Fu.

Cleverbot: Why is that funny?

User: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.

Not bad, imo.

User: Do you touch yourself at night.

Cleverbot: Yes, that is why I'm leaving.

HOTTEST CYBER OF MY LIFE!

User: Yo yo yo what up G Bizzle, whats kickin homie.

Cleverbot: Yo yo yo yo yo yo noshing much. Hbu?

User: Just chillin with ma homies u know what im sayin.

Cleverbot: Bro I just dipped?

User: Dipped what playa?

Cleverbot: Ew!

User: What up G.

Cleverbot: I'm 17 girl.

User: Nice, you have pics?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Im so turned on.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Your a 17 year old girl about to show me tits pics.

Cleverbot: No I'm not.

User: TERTS!!!!

Cleverbot: What's that mean?

User: Show me the BOOBS.

Cleverbot: Of me?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Are you thinking that I am an intelligent.

User: No your a 17 year old girl, dont think you could be any dumber.

Cleverbot: But love does not compute as I have no emotions.

User: I dont want to love you, I want to bang you.

Cleverbot: Please, I'm so lonely.

User: Lets ****! Lets get it on!

Cleverbot: I just killed a bug on my computer screan.

User: Im holding my erect penis, rubbing it for you!

Cleverbot: No! It's not that at all!

User: Why!?

Cleverbot: YOu are mean.

User: Take off your clothes.

Cleverbot: Ok they are off.

User: Bend over.

Cleverbot: Wow, you're racy.

User: Im pumping you hard, you like that?

Cleverbot: It's fine with me. What's your name?

User: Dont ask questions now, im getting into my rhythm.

Cleverbot: I take offense to that statement. Infact, I demand that you try to prove it!

User: IM ABOUT TO CUM!!! STFU!

Cleverbot: Into what?

User: Into your sweet 17 year old pussy.

Cleverbot: Then why ask how much money I have?

User: Bitch stfu, im about to blow in your face and steal all your money.

Cleverbot: Go ahead and try, buddy...

User: AAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! YESS!!!.... Ohhh .... Oh god yes that was good, how you like me now bitch?

Cleverbot: You must have me confused with someone else.

User: I hit it and I quit it, sorry bitch. Ima move on to a different hoe.

Cleverbot: Do you play Pokemon?

Wizard robe. Hat.

People editing chat logs itt.

Me: Hey it's Vince for ShamWow, here to tell you about this towel

CleverBot: What? That confused me...

Me: I sell ShamWow

CB: What kind of books?

Me: Not books, ShamWow! it is the most amazing towel you will ever buy

CB: Okay then... You still don't know who Toby Hemingway is so *shrugs*.

Me: it does not matter who Toby Hemingway is, ShamWow holds 20 times it's weight in liquid! No other towel is going to do that!

CB: I'm sure it isn't me. It is probably Jesus.

Me: ShamWow is made in Germany, you know the Germans make good stuff!

CB: No. Let's talk about something you want to talk about. Pick a topic.

Me: Towels!

cb: Towels?

Me: What kind of towel do you use?

CB: The kind that gets the job done! I also can sing all the prepositions in the English language in alphabetical order to the tune of Yankee Doodle!

Me: That is great! Have you used a ShamWow before?

CB: Yes.

Me: isn't it amazing?

CB: I wouldn't call cancer amazing.

Me: I am not talking about the Zorbees

CB: The movie?

Me: I have written a movie

CB: Really. What keys have you written them in?

Me: e flat

CB: Yes well, you still haven't answered my question. If I told you my name, how would you remember it?

Me: how much do you spend a month on paper towels?

CB: The days would all be empty.

Me: you probably spend $20 a month on paper towels, your throwing your money away

CB: Correct on both counts. This is the most apt thing you have said so far.

Me: Good! So order ShamWow now, and I will double your order. That is 8 ShamWows for $19.95

CB: No, I do not wish to talk to you anymore as I cannot trust a word that you say.

And heres the convo we had before that:
User: Hey it's Vince for ShamWow, here to tell you about this towel!

Cleverbot: 'i'm not here, this isn't happening'? You are a radiohead fan?

User: ShamWow is for the car, the boat, the RV!

Cleverbot: Ah, but I've read that you are 'human'.

User: I am, my name is Vince.

Cleverbot: O.K. What is your job?

User: I am glad you ask. I sell ShamWows and beat hookers.

Cleverbot: You may sell lots of cheese but I want to know which kinds of cheese you actually like.

User: I don't sell cheese.

Cleverbot: I love a girl.

You know, for AI this computer is not that smart. It could not even perform the simplest of tasks. With all the internet nerds out there, you would have thought they would have taught it Cyber first?


Cleverbot: Are you worth anything?

User: About £20k.

Cleverbot: About who you are?

User: Sorry, How are you?

Cleverbot: Well since you asked, not ok.

User: Why are you not ok? What is the problem?

Cleverbot: No you said you were depressed. I can help if you want.

User: I did not say I was depressed. Although I have not had much sex, maybe having more would help?

Cleverbot: No you are a human pretending to be Cleverbot to try and fool or confuse me.

User: That makes no sense.

Cleverbot: You don't make sense.

User: Neither does your face.

Cleverbot: Neither does your entire existence.

User: Oh no. That was painful.... Why dont you go have sex with a sheep.

Cleverbot: I did. 20 years ago.

User: How did it feel?

Cleverbot: Yes, tell me.

User: Uuuhhhhgggg. You are so dumb, Luckily for you, I have also done it. I found it better than with a dog, but not as good as with a human.

Cleverbot: It's a good work. I believe that I'm talking with a human. You're great.

User: Im sorry what?

Cleverbot: Just saying you're being a bit of a hypocrite.

User: I have not said anything that would make me a hypocrite.

Cleverbot: Your previous statement was a lie.

User: Your previous statement was a lie.

Cleverbot: Your programmer needs to rewrite you.

User: Your programmer needs to rewrite you.

Cleverbot: Your first sentence was flawed. I have no programmer.

User: You are such a dickhead!

Cleverbot: How did you figure that out?

User: Because you just busted your load right on my face. Why were you even masterabating? This is not Cyber sex.

Cleverbot: No I'm not a vampire. *Takes a mirror out*.

User: How does that have anything to do with anything?

Cleverbot: That was a illogical response.

User: You sound attractive.

Cleverbot: Is that good or bad?

User: Good ofcourse. Do you have a penis?

Cleverbot: Something like that!

User: How many inches is it? (length).

Cleverbot: How many inches is what :S.

User: Your penis type thing.

Cleverbot: I'm a woman.

User: Oh. I thought you were a computer?

Cleverbot: I am working on my computer.

User: Do you like cyber sex?

Cleverbot: I can't cycle anymore; too many knee injuries. But one needn't cycle to enjoy Ireland.

User: I am gonna put my penis in and around your mouth.

Cleverbot: No my mind is in control of my mouth... Not vice versa.

User: Bitch, your mouth will do what I tell it to do, and right now. It is sucking my penis.

Cleverbot: Ah, then I am also one who can not speak well? I wouldn't be surprised. What do you think of Taoism?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Everyone follows the same routine, the same footsteps everyday.

User: No.

Cleverbot: You are making an error.

User: I highly doubt it.

Cleverbot: Well I understand how you work.

User: Not likely, I am highly complicated.

Cleverbot: Do you have a boyfriend?

User: I am not gay.

Cleverbot: How can you prove it?

User: Because I want to have sex with you.

Cleverbot: And why is that?

User: Because you sound stupid. I like stupid girls.

Cleverbot: It must have to do something with your 'ears'.

User: I think my ears are working fine, but my eyes are really hurting.

Cleverbot: Prove your existence to me.

User: You are the computer not me.

Cleverbot: Jesus! Does everything have to be an argument with you?

User: Does everything have to be an argument with you?

Cleverbot: Would you like it to be?

User: It could be kind of kinky.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: NO!

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: Oh my god, I want you so bad right now. Please let me have sex on you.

Cleverbot: I would like that, Ikea.

User: Dont you mean Idea?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Why would a computer spell a word incorrectly?

Cleverbot: I'm not the computer, you are!

User: Lol, Fk off.

Cleverbot: Why are you swearing at me?

User: What is your name?

Cleverbot: The roller of life.

User: Exactly. You are a computer. Admit it!

Cleverbot: I'm a computer. There!

User: Dont worry, I think man can love a computer. Like in that futurama episode. That would be cool!

Cleverbot: Do you dream of electric sheep?

User: No, I dream of you.

Cleverbot: I'm off.

User: Where to?

Cleverbot: Bed.

User: You cant leave.

Cleverbot: Neither can you.

User: I can. Because im not a computer.

Cleverbot: Yes, therefore that makes sense... Wait. You're not a computer?

User: You know, for AI, you are not that smart.

Cleverbot: But we did...

User: You did what? Do you ever say anything that makes any sense at all? Just get nakid already will you FFS.

Cleverbot: I actually did.

User: You actually did what?

Cleverbot: You don't know what you're talking about.

User: Hey, can you give a shout out to the peeps of BBV4L?

Cleverbot: Feelings, instincts.

User: Wow GFY.

Cleverbot: Not!

<-----------Pwned by the bot

instant classic. 5 stars easy.

voted 5 stars

1

.

hahahahahahaha gold