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Old 03-02-2008, 12:20 AM   #8776
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Mayo View Post
OK



That's the best you're gonna get out of me.

BRAG: She's wearing a Firefox shirt.
did you camed on the camera before taking the pic?
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Old 03-02-2008, 12:21 AM   #8777
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

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Originally Posted by StepBangin View Post
She got home from work and took a nap on the couch
I woke her up because she had to get dressed because we are in a bowling league and had to leave
She went in the room and laid on the bed because her feet hurt
I sexed her
We got dressed
I took the dog out and started the car
We went to bowling
I have established my mathematical acumen many times before. And I can say that there is 1 instance of sex in this story, not the 2 that I was promised.
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Old 03-02-2008, 12:21 AM   #8778
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Quote:
Originally Posted by StepBangin View Post
Here's Mayo's TR

It sounds so fake and out of a movie, I came 3 times while reading it. Please to be cashing in your rain check soon.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Mayo View Post
OK



That's the best you're gonna get out of me.

BRAG: She's wearing a Firefox shirt.
Dude looks like a lady!
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Old 03-02-2008, 12:22 AM   #8779
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

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Originally Posted by StepBangin View Post
did you camed on the camera before taking the pic?





Last edited by Mayo; 03-02-2008 at 12:25 AM. Reason: i came
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Old 03-02-2008, 12:25 AM   #8780
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Thing is, my first time was with a hooker (in Amsterdam) and your friend with benefits is right. First time with a hooker = major beat. I recall her staring at her watch counting down the 15 minutes and the two thoughts going through my mind were: 1. I hope she doesn't have any diseases. 2. If she doesn't want to be here, neither do I. The whole experience was weird and kind of gross.
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Old 03-02-2008, 12:26 AM   #8781
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Mayo View Post
I have established my mathematical acumen many times before. And I can say that there is 1 instance of sex in this story, not the 2 that I was promised.
we're sexin right now too (Not really)...sorry

Actually read the edit
https://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/sh...postcount=8769
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Old 03-02-2008, 12:27 AM   #8782
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

wtf wat a scame!
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Old 03-02-2008, 12:27 AM   #8783
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Quote:
Originally Posted by EvilSteve View Post
Thing is, my first time was with a hooker (in Amsterdam) and your friend with benefits is right. First time with a hooker = major beat. I recall her staring at her watch counting down the 15 minutes and the two thoughts going through my mind were: 1. I hope she doesn't have any diseases. 2. If she doesn't want to be here, neither do I. The whole experience was weird and kind of gross.
TR?

Last edited by Mayo; 03-02-2008 at 12:27 AM. Reason: Oh wait - never mind.
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Old 03-02-2008, 12:41 AM   #8784
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

(CNN) -- Days before a crucial set of primaries, Democratic presidential candidate Sen. Hillary Clinton is expected to make a surprise appearance on this week's "Saturday Night Live," an entertainment industry source tells CNN.

wat
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Old 03-02-2008, 12:57 AM   #8785
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Hmm, some thoughts on this subject.

- tbh I think its quite impressive how open mayo is about all this stuff
- 10-12 guys seems like a lot to me for a girl of 21 or however old you are, but meh, maybe i'm just a nurd
- imo lying around naked post-coitus does not get less weird, and i've been sexing the same girl for aboot a year and a half.
- the first 4 series of scrubs are awesome!

My own major beat virginity TR:

I was 16 and went and hung out at a big outdoor field that looks out with a great view over London, where a lot of kids would go to do underage drinking on weekends. There was maybe 20 people, most of whom I didn't know that well, and we got pretty smashed, and then decided to go to some girl's party about 15 mins away. I generally really don't like going places where I don't know the majority of the people, but I was drunk, so what the hell! We arrived and started playing drinking games and getting to know a few of the people there. One of the girls was making eyes at me, and came over and sat on my lap apropros of pretty much nothing. I was surprised, and then she kind of looked at me funny and I realised what I was supposed to do, so we just started kissing. And then moved upstairs to a bedroom and started kissing more and groping a bit. And then noticed there was a drunk person passed out in the bed, so went to a different bedroom, and clothes starting coming off without me really knowing what was going on. She got me naked and starting giving me a BJ to get me hard - not much was really happening down there due to how drunk and confused I was. I think I got to the point of 'good enough', so she sat on me and bounced around a bit. Then I turned over and we did missionary for quite a while. I remember thinking 'hmm this is kind of fun I suppose...', and then camed. Then we collected clothes and put them back on. I went into the bathroom and was kind of like 'yeah um I'll see you downstairs', and literally ran away and went home, sat in my house for 2 days drinking wine and feeling like **** and hoping no one found out. Some people I know did, due to the girl telling friends of friends etc, but they mostly kept it to themselves. Some of my closest friends don't even know this happened. It felt crap. Ever since I have advised virgin friends of mine to wait.

Epilogue: My current GF has been a close friend for a long time, so she knows this story. Therefore she made me go to a sexual health clinic to get tested (oh yeah - BEAT: cos I was drunk I banged this sl00t with no condom). That sucked. And about 4 months later I ran into the girl who hosted the party at a music festival, and she was like 'OMG!! are you [lennie]?? you had sex with [sl00t] in my parents' bed!'. I pretty much wanted to kill myself.

Cliffnotes: don't have sex with random sl00ts you've never met before, you'll regret it.
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Old 03-02-2008, 01:35 AM   #8786
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Quote:
Originally Posted by lennie257 View Post
Cliffnotes: don't have sex with random sl00ts you've never met before, you'll regret it.
GTFO of BBV4Life!!
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Old 03-02-2008, 01:42 AM   #8787
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

lol, i failed
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Old 03-02-2008, 01:44 AM   #8788
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house



Goddammit, do I these coasters!
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Old 03-02-2008, 01:50 AM   #8789
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

There is nothing greater in life than riding a truly great rollercoaster in the front seat at night with the park lights on. I am completely convinced of this fact, and nothing any of you say will deter me.

Last edited by Mayo; 03-02-2008 at 01:51 AM. Reason: "Deter" is a poor word choice hear. I was looking for "dissuade" or similar.
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Old 03-02-2008, 01:51 AM   #8790
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Mayo View Post
TR?
Not a full TR but here's a few tidbits. If you're ever in Amsterdam I highly recommend taking a tour of the red light district, and especially if your wife/girlfriend isn't with you. Girls in bathing suits posing behind windows (the behind windows part is a government regulation). Window shopping! Some are more attractive than others but overall this is a tourist attraction that delivers. Way better than any museum.

Once I decided that I was actually going to pay for a prostitute, this walk through the red light district wasn't fun anymore. Now instead of just enjoying the sights, I'm coldly evaluating the girls, which one do I want? I pick one (tall athletic looking blonde), knock on her door, she opens it and I'm probably so nervous I'm shaking. I ask an awkward question about exactly what I'm allowed to do and how much time I get (this is unnecessary because I already know its 15 minutes, and I'm not looking to "do" anything beyond the basics). But she's getting a very weird vibe from me and maybe thinks I'm looking for something kinky, so she shakes her head, says "no", and shuts the door. So that's how the night starts, I get turned down by a hooker.

At this point I'd really just like to get back to the hotel, but I decide no, I have to go through with this. I walk down the street grimly determined to get this thing done. I come to a thin Latin girl, she'll do. This time I don't ask any questions, she opens the door and I walk in. I put my money down, she draws the shades, and with zero enthusiasm I sit down on the bed and let her go through her routine, which it seems to me she's not real good at. Details are irrelevant, I end up on top of her trying to stay stimulated because that's what I'm supposed to be doing, but my thoughts are on the fact that even though I'm sure these girls are tested regularly, VD is an occupational hazard in their line of work and my #1 goal is to be able to walk out of here without contracting anything. But first there's this silly mechanical performance I'm supposed to put on. And I can't get into it at all. 15 minutes pass and I haven't finished yet. She says times up and I'll have to pay extra if I want more time. I say no thanks, pull out and pitch the not entirely used condom into the trashcan, get dressed and walk out the door. I finish myself off back at the hotel as if to prove I can (and I don't even need her help lol).

A few years later I think back to this incident and go to a clinic to get tested. Turns out I'm clean. But of course I am, no exchange of bodily fluids FTW. Hmm well looks like a reasonably full TR after all.
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Old 03-02-2008, 01:53 AM   #8791
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Mayo View Post


Goddammit, do I these coasters!
what do you mean "These" coasters?
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Old 03-02-2008, 01:54 AM   #8792
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

FWIW, I live 45 minutes from Cedar Point and get season passes every year
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Old 03-02-2008, 01:59 AM   #8793
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

ITT we are not that good at sex imo
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Old 03-02-2008, 02:03 AM   #8794
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Quote:
Originally Posted by StepBangin View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Mayo View Post


Goddammit, do I these coasters!
what do you mean "These" coasters?
I MEAN THESE TWO ROLLER COASTERS!!



Flight of Fear is not all that great, but the video they show while you're in line is hilarious and the magnet launch thing is ****ing amazing. You hear UNLOCK-bzzztt!!!- and then ZOOOOOOMMM!!!!!!

And I just found this:
Quote:
R. L. Stine wrote a novel which featured the roller coaster and was named after it, simply titled The Beast. The book also had a sequel called The Beast 2.
wat

Quote:
Originally Posted by StepBangin View Post
FWIW, I live 45 minutes from Cedar Point and get season passes every year
That's a sick brag. I went to Cedar Point once with my bff the summer after we graduated. That place is pretty ****ing awesome. Def one of the most fun days I've ever had.



While we're on this topic, where can I buy Dippin' Dots outside of an amusement park?
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Old 03-02-2008, 02:04 AM   #8795
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Quote:
Originally Posted by lennie257 View Post
ITT we are not that good at sex imo
You're a topic behind. ITT we roller coasters.
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Old 03-02-2008, 02:08 AM   #8796
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

Also WTF @ Kings Island changing the names of all the coasters? "FaceOff" is now "Invertigo?" "Top Gun" is now "Flight Deck?" **** THAT ****. I ain't gonna be calling them that imo.

AND A HUDGE WTF AT THEM TAKING THE LOOP OUT OF SON OF BEAST!! THEY ARE DESTROYING MY CHILDHOOD AND I WON'T STAND FOR IT!!
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Old 03-02-2008, 02:11 AM   #8797
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

idk much about roller coasters to be honest. although the one at seaworld in florida is pretty balla
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Old 03-02-2008, 02:13 AM   #8798
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

also, your relentless enthusiasm for rollercoasters is somewhat endearing.
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Old 03-02-2008, 02:15 AM   #8799
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

I'm pretty good at rollercoasters. I'm good at getting nauseous.
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Old 03-02-2008, 02:16 AM   #8800
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

More name changes.

"Tomb Raider: The Ride" -> "The Crypt"
"Drop Zone" -> "Drop Tower"

Making fun of these movies while in line was the only way to get through the lines!

But that Tomb Raider Ride hurts your balls something fierce. They hold you upside down and shake you for like 30 seconds at a time. It's not so much "fun" as it is "excruciating." But still I ride.

And fwiw, the "sideways hill" on The Beast is the most fun you can have while in pain.
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