i left the house and it had the following consequences:
my car is now clean
i got to eat hamburgers

https://twitter.com/bbcnews/status/1031218117517733889

don’t go on cruise ships

isn't cruise ship like a floating house and her error was in leaving the cruise ship, which would be like leaving her temporary floating house in a way?


sorry, just curious

I have to leave my house tomorrow. Does anyone here have any advice how to improve my odds of survival?
All advice is appreciated.

full face helmet

don't walk in the street or **** around. just keep your eyes open but also check behind you because a car can drive up on a curb behind you really fast and you would never see it coming so you gotta look back. and just generally walk as far away from the curb as you can, and if you have a tree or a post blocking you can linger a little longer because it's generally safer there but in between blocking zones you should move briskly, but not too briskly, obviously, because you can get in trouble that way too. just be reasonable, please.

don't go to an amusement park. people get left upside down for hours and they get a headache or injure themselves or die, there's no reason to go to an amusement park. stick to carnivals, but not the rides, and don't indulge in too much carnival food but don't avoid eating for too long because that can also lead to dizzyness which could lead to falling into the street to get run over or falling over the side of a bridge or rolling down a hill into snakes, anything could happen so remember to eat a little bit every few hours and don't forget to drink

https://twitter.com/ABC/status/1033171381205311488

Brought to you by Acme.

It's like, on any given day you can "go outside" and inherit the chance of being struck down by a meteorite. But then there's space rock, which trades better than gold. So in a way it's a double edged sword -- there is the good, and the bad. I'm glad op is here to give us the critical facts.

Thank you all for the good advice. It feels good to be alive.

this is a really cool house but i wouldn't want to live there because you only get this amazing view if you're walking in from the outside and i'd never want to leave because it's in the middle of the desert, but i'd love a house right in the spot where the person taking this picture is, it's a great view for a house

But it provides bonus food and production on desert tiles. And the holy grail is inside.

https://twitter.com/mashable/status/1034297271016411136

don't use this or buy this, ever. because you're going to wake up in total darkness caught in a net which is this big fabric/plastic deflated tent that you closed yourself into when you foolishly thought there was no way it could deflate in the middle of the night, leaving you to wake up drowning, like you don't have even one last chance to take a big breath, you're going to wake up wanting to cough and get your bearings but you'll wake up inside of a deflated tent and you'll have no idea how to get out as you're sinking to the bottom of the lake, and even if you can find a way out of the deflated tent that has tightly wrapped around you as it deflated, you'll be 20 feet below the surface of a lake at night, you'll have no idea where to swim to get to the surface, you'll be totally ****ed and you'll drown to death.

don't let your guard down and relax if you're outside of your house. especially around water.

but you also want to be careful not to go too far away from water, either

you can avoid all these problems with water and so forth by just staying inside your house, which has everything you need and it's super safe

https://twitter.com/nbcnews/status/1034643567241768960

don’t risk your life leaving your house. stay home and eat cheese instead

brb ordering cheese and yoghurt

https://twitter.com/washingtonpost/s...15469590130688

I just ate some cheese!! Man, that was a close one.

No Promises . . .

isn't cheese spoiled milk that has solidified?

absolutely

can't beat the holy grail