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07-30-2018 , 06:51 PM

#26

Tuma

Worships Amon-Ra

Join Date: Aug 2012 Posts: 16,390

i laughed ^. point to staying inside.

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07-30-2018 , 06:51 PM

#27

Tuma

Worships Amon-Ra

Join Date: Aug 2012 Posts: 16,390

counter point: the fashion police

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07-31-2018 , 12:16 AM

#28

702guy

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Mar 2013 Posts: 8,416

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07-31-2018 , 12:23 AM

#29

zikzak

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 22,199

I left the house today and it was horrible. I went to a different state and ended up dozens of miles from home wandering unfamiliar cities looking for a place to eat. I eventually settled on Popeye's, which tbh really wasn't horrible at all. I like fried chicken.

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07-31-2018 , 04:47 AM

#30

Big_Bad_Bill

journeyman

Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 361

Hiding in my room, safe within my womb,
I touch no one and no one touches me.

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07-31-2018 , 07:14 PM

#31

riitaoja

adept

Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 793

I left my house last friday and tomorrow I'll find out if it's still standing. I hope so...

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07-31-2018 , 11:40 PM

#32

D1G1TALFOX

old hand

Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 1,202

. . .

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08-01-2018 , 05:37 AM

#33

FranFran

Fran and stuff

Join Date: Jun 2014 Posts: 20,451

I once opened my window, it was scary.

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08-01-2018 , 04:19 PM

#34

ScreaminAsian

For President

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 33,333

https://twitter.com/CBSNews/status/1024731700599894017

don't wear a necklace with a solid color t-shirt and jeans

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08-01-2018 , 10:41 PM

#35

thabighurt35

**** you Monday

Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 11,588

I like your blog a lot better

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08-02-2018 , 02:25 AM

#36

ScreaminAsian

For President

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 33,333

https://twitter.com/BuzzFeedNews/sta...97835655995392

don't buy latte at mcdonalds

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08-02-2018 , 03:25 AM

#37

Captain Boomer

centurion

Join Date: Jul 2018 Posts: 110

All who read these terrible tales just remember if you never leave your house, you will still die. Without having lived first.

But everyone who has had a near-death experience says dying is the best thing ever, so don't worry, everything is going to be okay.

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08-02-2018 , 04:59 AM

#38

FranFran

Fran and stuff

Join Date: Jun 2014 Posts: 20,451

:rolleyez:

Another public spaces scam

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08-02-2018 , 02:51 PM

#39

ScreaminAsian

For President

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 33,333

https://twitter.com/cnn/status/1025083837825671169

don’t drink too much alcohol while being careful to also not drink too little alcohol

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08-02-2018 , 02:55 PM

#40

zikzak

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 22,199

Binge on the weekends and stay sober on weekdays.

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08-02-2018 , 05:22 PM

#41

ScreaminAsian

For President

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 33,333

Quote:

Originally Posted by Captain Boomer

dear readers,

dead people feel no thoughts or emotions, no more than a computer can do calculations after the power cord is unplugged. dead people don’t feel satisfaction or remorse, they feel nothing at all. the only thing to do with life is to not die. don’t leave your house. don’t drink the wrong amount of alcohol. don’t touch plants with your skin. don’t buy specialty food/drink at mcdonald’s. stay tuned to this thread for more tips and tricks.

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08-02-2018 , 11:09 PM

#42

ScreaminAsian

For President

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 33,333

https://twitter.com/ABC/status/1025214272618618882

don't charge electric scooters inside your house. keep it outside of your house with the rest of the danger

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08-03-2018 , 05:12 AM

#43

riitaoja

adept

Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 793

Quote:

Originally Posted by riitaoja

I left my house last friday and tomorrow I'll find out if it's still standing. I hope so...

The house is still there!

Quote

08-03-2018 , 08:23 PM

#44

ScreaminAsian

For President

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 33,333

and don't dive into water. so many people get head and neck injuries diving into water or even worse they're left paralyzed for the rest of their lives, so if you accidentally leave your house and your friends are pressuring you to jump into some water, just don't do it. do not do it. i don't care how many people you see jump, 99/100 people can do it fine but you're probably gonna be that 1 and it would be really really bad and not at all worth it. just stay inside your house.

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08-06-2018 , 04:10 PM

#45

ScreaminAsian

For President

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 33,333

don't go into the ocean. if you want to be in water just get a swimming pool installed at your house

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08-07-2018 , 02:14 AM

#46

ScreaminAsian

For President

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 33,333

https://twitter.com/ABC/status/1026660178324869120

Quote

08-07-2018 , 02:21 AM

#47

LonelyBox

You call this a blog?

Join Date: Jan 2016 Posts: 5,263

My first book is about a pineapple named Winston, it's a 678 page long novel, where Winston wants to find his sexuality, but realizes that he, as a pineapple,
has no gender, or need for sex, so, after 6 chapters of internal conflict, he has 2 chapters of self realization. He than decides to become a politician,
but realizes that in only 2 days, he'll rot. Once achieving his dreams of becoming a politician, he realizes that all politicians are genderless,
rotting fruits, just as he is. In the end, he has the horrifying realization that he's a pineapple, and therefore can't, think, move, or talk,
and spend 5 chapters finding out how he got into the white house.

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08-07-2018 , 02:33 AM

#48

FranFran

Fran and stuff

Join Date: Jun 2014 Posts: 20,451

I need mire tips I need them now

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08-07-2018 , 11:57 AM

#49

Tuma

Worships Amon-Ra

Join Date: Aug 2012 Posts: 16,390

avoid using chinese electricity / devices

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08-08-2018 , 09:16 PM

#50

ScreaminAsian

For President

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 33,333

https://twitter.com/ABC/status/1027327639214845957

don't ski on a real mountain, keep your skiing to the small man-made hills nowhere near any mountains. and even then, there's really nothing you gain by skiing, just stay inside your house, there's no reason to get into any of this, honestly

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