So...uh...this is kinda weird. I know I haven't been that active around here for a while, but I have some fond memories of this community. It's done a lot to help me, and I hope I've helped some others along the way.

I'm going to quit poker.

It's been a fun ride. I've had a lot of great opportunities, traveled a ton, and made some great friends. But I used to bounce out of bed on Sundays so I wouldn't miss any hands in the Sunday Warm-up. For the past few months I've been pretty ambivalent about missing it entirely.

A long time ago, when I hopped in the well, I wrote about the way poker had me playing chicken with my mental health. On the days when I can be totally honest with myself, I know that that never really changed. I was lucky to have enough money to bury the problem, which was nice, but it hasn't helped me fix it.

Poker's been good for money, but not much else, really. And that's stopped being good enough.

I don't know why I felt like writing this post. I guess it's part thank, part goodbye, and part cementing this decision a little bit because I know it's going to be tough to make a clean break. But I don't think I can just scale back, it's too easy to fall back into the trap of doing the same thing I've always done and getting the same thing I've always gotten: money, but not much else, really.

So: thank you, and goodbye, and good luck all.

Some of the stuff you've written on mental health in relation to poker lifestyle really resonated with me and I appreciate (to some extent at least) the struggles you've had/are having. Nothing but love and respect. glgl

also excellent thread title.

Thanks man, I've been really touched, personally, by the stories of you ****ing your wife's sister in the ass.

makes it all worthwhile, thanks

gg ben, happy for you that you found something more satisfying than poker really. I think it's - deep down - something we all want to have in the end. poker is definitely fun, but in the end there is much more in life to enjoy besides poker.

also you will now get the rungood of the rec player when you decide to one table the millie for instance.

I've had the run good of a rec player for a long time now

Thanks for being a part of this community and I hope you enjoy whatever comes next for you. As someone who has tried and failed at quitting poker when I was unhappy- don't feel ashamed if you end up returning. I felt super embarrassed about returning to poker since it felt like a failure at moving on yet the whole community was very welcoming when I returned

Thanks Mike. That's been a big concern of mine and I guess I was a little anxious about making this decision "public" as goofy as that sounds. I'd like to think I've gotten decent at changing my mind without worrying about the fallout. On the other hand, it's taken me four years to make this decision so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Good luck with whatever you chose to do next Ben, I hope you find something that gives you the balance that is hard to achieve in poker.

You were a great asset to this community and I am sure I speak on behalf of lots of people when I say I learned tons from your strategy posts over the years

As someone who has transitioned away from full time poker over the past 2 years, I will say I found it far easier to leave behind than I originally thought and that now I get far more enjoyment from playing some random live tournament than I ever thought possible

Judging from the pictures on your fb you seem happy. Thanks for all the nice posts in here and HSMTTs. Good luck!

gg ben. I enjoy your twitter a lot, always a fun guy. Hope you find peace trying to not play poker, this part is pretty hard sometimes

Thanks for the kind words ye gentlemen and scholars

I have always been a huge fan of your contributions to this forum. Many of your struggles with mental health appear to mirror many of my own; and while I've got an awful lot less money, that was always huge for me. Always kinda looked up to you from afar, sort of like someone else weathering the same storm and coming out ahead. It was inspirational. Still is.

It always pains me a bit when I see people drop out of poker. Have been around a while and have seen plenty of crushers leave it behind, have lots of close friends who've quit the game. Makes traveling to live stops much less enticing.

Alas, there is infinitely more to life than money and amassing titles and respect in a game completely focused on financially benefiting ones self. I applaud your decision to move away and focus on bettering yourself and your mental well being, so as to live a life ripe with love and happiness. Both of which I hope and wish for you.

With his wife's permission? Man, iv'e gotta read about this!

Whats next?

Dunno yet. Closest thing I have to direction is the urge to write. I will pick my head up and look around for the right thing for me, but it will be easier with some perspective and distance I think.

I hope everything goes well man, you´re def a legend of this game (and you will be).
As ´´ship´´ mentioned, seeing crushers quit poker, makes me sad man, but life is to short to do things that makes us unhappy , so yeah glgl wish all the best

Good luck Ben, sounds like you're in a similar place to where I was a year ago. Now I play live every now and then for fun and that's about it.

I never did thank you properly for that coaching session we had, I binked pretty big a few months after that (although it was mostly lol variance). The coaching helped me focus for a while, but after a bit I lost that passion to improve and it was only a matter of time then!

FWIW I think it is better to make a clean break (at least from online) and you might find it a lot easier than you think!

Cheers Andy.

Good night sweet prince.

Please don't write a poker book

When a fighter starts contemplating retirement it usually translates to he should have quit a few fights ago. It sounds like you're making a good decision and I'd love for you to share your experiences a few months/years down the road.... as leaving a game that has become so much a part of who you are to venture down a new road can be very scary.
Ironic that even an unstable game like poker can seem to have more stability to a life compared to the unknown.

Best of luck and as Timex said if you choose to come back you then it won't be the be all end all.

Haha, I've envisioned making a similar post with the exact same headline for quite a while now. The ~5% of the time you weren't trolling I always enjoyed reading your strategy posts. Was also nice to briefly meet and drunkenly manhug you in Malta. Gl in your future endeavours man and take care.

PS. Thread needs dog pic threadsavers.
PPS. In before you win the millball today with this jinx of a thread.

godspeed benjamin

On behalf of depressed poker players everywhere, you and I hope you'll still troll me on twitter when I accidentally get excited about poker.

gg ben was a pleasure to meet you and learn from you. 1st ballot hof imo.



plz don't quit twitter

A very relatable, OP. Good luck with whatever you do next, Ben and many thanks for the advices you've given over the years.