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Old 11-16-2009, 02:57 AM   #401
atakdog
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Originally Posted by CPFB View Post
atak,

I don't have anything to add. I just wanted to let you know that I've enjoyed reading your well thus far.

Gald you like it. The last page or so hasn't been my favorite, but I didn't expect this to be fun, nor particularly want it to be.

btw, thank you for putting together my first werewolf game ever, Carnival of the Animals. As you can see, it stuck.
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Old 11-16-2009, 03:03 AM   #402
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Re: The well: atakdog

Just saw your pub toast. Has anyone ever told you that you bear a resemblance to David Boreanaz?

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Old 11-16-2009, 03:05 AM   #403
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Originally Posted by wahoopride View Post
you should post in the politics forum they would love you!

to what extent would you agree with the following statements:

intelligence should affect your quality of life
work ethic should affect your quality of life
everyone's quality of life should be approximately the same
people are happier when their quality of life is the same as others
equality is more important than freedom (using the term freedom broadly)
There are "should"s here. Therefore, you need to understand that these are my preferences and beliefs, but that I'm not saying I know I'm right or would impose them on others. That said:

Intelligence: the toughest of these. Society doesn't work very well if it doesn't matter, but having it be all-important is fairly wrong. 5/10, maybe, but I really don't know what 's right.

Work ethic: 10. In my ideal world, hard work and being good to other people determine your quality of life.

Everyone approximately the same: 0. But everyone's opportunity, reasonably, to achieve the same quality of life should be the same: 10.

People are happier when their quality of life is the same as others: 10, to the extent it means people aren't doing better than they are. 0, to the extent it means they aren't doing better than others. People like to feel superior; they hate to feel inferior. I believe that the latter effect is the stronger of the two, but for all I know there's research that shows the opposite.

Equality is more important than freedom: Tough one. Equality of opportunity is incredibly important; equality in practice isn't really, in part because it's unworkable. Freedom is not an inherent right, but freedom to do what one want makes people happy, which is pretty much the point. 5.
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Old 11-16-2009, 03:07 AM   #404
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Re: The well: atakdog

atak,

politics inevitably comes up in wells. It happens.

I'm glad that I was able to mod your first game. I think that was the last game I modded on my own actually.

Would you consider moving back to Austin if you had the chance? (I was at UT from 2001-2006 and miss Austin considerably.)
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Old 11-16-2009, 03:07 AM   #405
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Just saw your pub toast. Has anyone ever told you that you bear a resemblance to David Boreanaz?
No, that one's new to me. Many years ago I used to get compared to Kurt Russell a lot, but he has aged terribly so I hope that was wrong.
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Old 11-16-2009, 03:17 AM   #406
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Re: The well: atakdog

I understand how your opinions lead to the estate tax but not how they lead to the taxes on the living that seem to attempt to promote equality of outcome.

if you don't want to talk politics that is fine, your other stuff is at least as interesting if not more. i am just curious.
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Old 11-16-2009, 03:18 AM   #407
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Re: The well: atakdog

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atak,

politics inevitably comes up in wells. It happens.

I'm glad that I was able to mod your first game. I think that was the last game I modded on my own actually.

Would you consider moving back to Austin if you had the chance? (I was at UT from 2001-2006 and miss Austin considerably.)
I didn't work to stave off the politics by any means, obviously. I don't like being considered a fascist, but such is life.

I didn't fit Texas at all. I viewed Austin as a small island of rationality in a sea of reactionary illogic, and it was clearly a far better place to live than anywhere else in the state, but it was still Texas. I also got little out of many of the best things about the city: I don't particularly enjoy live music, I don't do clubs, and i think allegiance to sports is silly (not harmful except to the extent it siphons resources from education, I'm just not into it).

But the most important reason I didn't stay, and probably wouldn't go back unless my situation changed dramatically (which I would like, but that;'s a different issue), is that the odds of meeting the right woman there seemed too low. Too many of the people I met were so Christian that it wouldn't have worked; too many of the rest were too intentionally unconventional, which I find (perhaps surprisingly) unattractive.

Plus, its hot.

Given the right situation, there are many places I'd happily live, and Austin is among them (and noplace else in Texas is), but it's hard to imagine it being at the top of mty list.
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Old 11-16-2009, 03:22 AM   #408
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Re: The well: atakdog

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I understand how your opinions lead to the estate tax but not how they lead to the taxes on the living that seem to attempt to promote equality of outcome.

if you don't want to talk politics that is fine, your other stuff is at least as interesting if not more. i am just curious.
Estate taxes alone might be enough to get us most of the way there. I still need to fund the government, of course. But it's true: if I could arrange to ensure that everyone started at the same level, it wouldn't bother me nearly as much if some rose far higher than others.

I'm going to go back into the thread and see what else I've missed. This is way harder than I thought it would be. (And gawd, Addict starts up tomorrow... I think I'm not destined to win that game, but that's no big deal — most people who know me irl don't believe it, but I'm not terribly competitive. Losing fair and square is always fine unless I'm really emotionally invested in something, and that rarely happens.)
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Old 11-16-2009, 03:44 AM   #409
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Re: The well: atakdog

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What was your HS experience like? Did you play sports? Have a lot of girlfriends? Of keep to yourself?
High school was mostly pretty unfun, but there were some twists. Unsurprisingly, I didn't fit in terribly well. I had worked to become more normal — for example, in junior high I and participated in sports to, basically, have a group among whom I might be popular. First was wrestling, which worked in that I was good at it but certainly wasn't cool. Then football, which actually did work to some extent. Then the the track team, but I really hated running so I wound up pole vaulting.

Theh pattern continued into high school (including the wrestling, which yielded the crushed trachea and my first surgery, and the track, but I was too small to play football well so I gave that up). I was not popular, but I was not picked on at all — I went to pretty academically oriented school, and at least people respected that i was pretty good at stuff.

I and no girfriend until senior year, when somehow I wound up with two at once, both popular and attractive — not even sure how it happened. Eventually I had to choose between them, and I chose wrong, dropping the sexually aggressive one because, well, I felt like I couldn't handle it. that, in fact, was the dumbest decision I've made (someone asked this), leaving someone basically because she wanted to have sex. Certainly never made that mistake again.

An odd thing happened senior year. Most of my freinds had graduated that year or the one before, because I had taken all my classes out of order. In honors writing class (which really wasn't super-honors — it was for people who weren't in AP lit, but I'd taken that already) I wound up sitting next to someone I'd never have chosen — one of the artsy, stoner crowd, as we would have said. Up until then I'd been very straitlaced (around then is when I was dropping the girl who wanted sex...), but Chris and I wound up being friends and in turn he introduced me to his freinds. And... they didn't care that I was in every honors class and on every recruiter's list or any of that stuff they were just nice to most people, including to me. I wound up going to some concerts (saw the Violent femmes before anyone knew who they were; got thrown out of Spinal Tap), trying pot and hash and whippets, and generally acting like I wasn't supposed to act. and it was better.

But better than that, I wasn't forced into it. I didn't really like the drugs (except the nitrous, which is way cool), so I wound up not doing it much — and they didn't care about that either.

The second half of senior year was relaxed, as I had done everything already academically. I took weight training and study hall, and went t Tiger's games even though that meant cutting a couple of periods. (That was the year they started 35-5 and went on to win the Series.) The Presidential Scholar thing happened, along with other awards; the Michigan legislature passed a bill congratulating me on my achievements. I still and a girlfriend (really my only one all through high school, I guess). I had some friends, if not an enormous lot. I led the best senior prank our school had ever had, the theft of every bell in the school over a one-week period. (I gave them back later.) Senior year was not bad.
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Old 11-16-2009, 03:55 AM   #410
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Who is your most longstanding friend?

Think of a time when someone else did something very nice for you. What is the first thing that comes to mind?
I run away. From everyone — family and friends. I disappear for long stretches. I don't know why; it doesn't seem to follow from any of the rest of it.

There are people I would call my friends from far back, in some cases very far back. One from high school. But though I call them my friends, I don't talk to them often at all. Still, there are a few people I could call at ay our of any day if I needed something or were just lonely, and they could do the same, and it's been that way for years. One was a sort-of girlfriend from high school (not one of those mentioned above). One is the happiest person I know, which doesn't sound like it would fit very well with me but she and I have always clicked. More recently, I have connected very well with a couple people who are now still in Texas — one a girlfriend-turned friend, and one a former student.

Every one of those people, and everyone else I keep in contcat with for long, is female, though I'm not sure what that says.

________

Nicest thing: Considering historical events only, the thing that comes to mind first is one of my law school professors taking it upon himself to ensure that I finished all my courses, even as I was in the throes of depression as a 3L (this having been precipitated by watching my dog killed by a car; it's worse than that, actually, but that's not the point). I screwed up on my own, he owed me nothing as I was finished with his class (fed courts) — but he heard I had disappeared, sought me out, and dragged me back. A couple of other people were very nice to me around that time. One fellow student eventually let me live on her living room floor, ending my period of homelessness (about which I still have to answer questions...). Others were similarly generous. That I never believed I deserved any of these things made them even more special.
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Old 11-16-2009, 04:11 AM   #411
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Re: The well: atakdog

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There's no anger in the question, I'm genuinely curious if someone who believes that people have no right to their money, their guns, or their freedom, can at the same time value people intrisically.

I'd say you aren't a communist at all, you're a fascist.
I agree with this.
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Old 11-16-2009, 04:16 AM   #412
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Re: The well: atakdog

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How far away from K do you live? When will you see him next?
He's on the west coast. His mother has moved something like seven or eight times since we broke up, and has been married and divorced, but she seems to have settled now, which is good.

I get him summers and Christmas break. When we broke up his mother sought more than that, and the judge said no; I sought half custody, and the judge laughed. It was in rural Pennsylvania, and I'm told there was never the slightest chance I could get more.

I would love for him to live with me now, because I think it would be best for him, but I won't do it unless it's what he wants because I don't want to involve him in a fight. (I also probably couldn't win.) Under Texas law, once he hit 12 his wishes become the strong presumption; under Illinois law the presumption is that the status quo should prevail, so thats a lot harder. In any case, he's not ready yet; when we discuss it always comes down to two things: he's worried about a new school (he's a kid) and he knows his mother would miss him and thinks she couldn't handle it as well as I do. Re the latter point, while I hate the result it at least tells me that he's learning a strong sense of the value of being kind to others. To the extent that's my doing (who knows?), that's good, and I'm so proud of him for that thought process.

(When he leaves at the end of the summer, he always gives me advice on what to do because he knows I get sad, as he puts it. Basically, he says I need to work hard, because I like that, and find a girlfriend. Doesn't sound like much — but when the last thing he says to me as he gets on the plane is that I should try to find ways to be happy and that he'll be back soon, it's tear-jerker territory.)

When I talked to him just after Halloween, a couple weeks ago, he told me his mother hadn't let him go trick or treating because she was worried about swine flu. He was stoic but obviously sad, and it was one of the few times I could hear in his voice that he was thinking maybe he'd made the wrong decision.



Quote:
Have you ever been unfaithful while in a relationship? Ever been cheated on?
I have cheated, though it's been a long while. It was when I was engaged, long ago, to someone who I felt was withdrawing and probably cheating herself. It was almost as if I felt it would hurt less if I got there first. She was cheating, it turned out, but that didn't make it OK. Now, I know that my doing it again is always a danger because I am so fearful of being left that there's always that same pathological need to preempt it, as if it won't hurt so much, but I am very certain that it will not manifest itself outwardly — more of that moral overshooting that I mentioned earlier.

I've been engaged twice; each fiancée cheated. So did a long-term girlfriend who happened to be an alcoholic; she argued (while sober) that it was OK because she was drunk so it really didn't mean anything, and anyway it was only a blow job. That relationship didn't last much longer.

I definitely have a tendency to behave in relationships as if I've been abused, but that history doesn't really explain it so it's not clear what else is going on.

Some day I hope to find someone who makes me feel safe enough that I won't think about this. I have known two such people, and though things haven't worked out for other reasons that tells me there is hope.
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Old 11-16-2009, 04:28 AM   #413
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Why does McAvoy bug you so much? Why does BEG?
I don't know what McAvoy's like in real life. I do know that the persona he adopts here, real or false, greatly values winning, revels in manipulating people, and various other things that are anathema to how I try to live. And my life on POG is my life — this isn't an internet persona, in fact at times it feels more real than the rest of the world. Hence, I take it all (too) seriously.

But that isn't what really does it — it's that when he figures out that something he's doing bothers someone, he does it more. He has various justifications but I don't care about them — that's enough for me.

It's too bad, because there are many times that I really enjoy playing with him. But the intentional cruelty (too strong a word, really, but that's the point) does it for me.


BEG has always been frustrating for many of us, I think, but it's particularly strong for me because I so prefer rational, logical discourse to emotional reaction or random decisions. The latest incident (wherein she killed me, a known power villager, as village vigilante rather than save another villager, because she was angry at me, then saying afterward that it was justified because I deserved it and after all she's a woman) epitomized the problem. I don't doubt that she's a nice person, but I don't know how to deal with someone who would do that — it's just too alien for me to handle.
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Old 11-16-2009, 04:31 AM   #414
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Have you ever done anything incredibally degenerate? (gambling wise)
I forgot — I once lost a couple thousand dollars in a drunken game of in between (quarter ante), when I absolutely couldn't afford it — in fact, I couldn't even cover the check. I did win it back, but that was ungood.

This was before I started playing poker for real When I did, I never drank at the table if any serious money was involved.
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Old 11-16-2009, 04:44 AM   #415
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Re: The well: atakdog

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please tell your complete poker story
I talked about playing live already. Other stuff:

I started to play after a high school friend of mine and a poker party (dollar stakes). he invited one of his coworkers, who ujsyt destroyed the game. I'd never seen anyone do that — I didn't know it was possible... and I decided I had to learn. The next day I asked him how; he basically said get Sklansky's book and then go to Garden City and just play. I did, starting at 1-2, and off I went.

As I said earlier I quit when I went to law school, and didn't play at all for many years. Part of this was that it was inconvenient, but part was that i didn't like who I was when I was playing poker. In poker, you talke money from other people because they're stupid. Yes, they're trying to take it fromyou too, so it's not as if it's the quintessence of evil, but it's unpleasant. I lied habitually; I thought ill of most people. So I wasn't eager to go back to that.


Fast forward to a couple years ago. I was rendered mostly immobile for a longtime with a herniated cervical disk — I kept teaching as long as I could, but eventually I started blacking out from pain, which didn't work. I wound up basically lying on my back for a few months, and somewhere in there I decided I'd try online poker, about which some of my students had told me. I woulnd up on bodog (because i was able to get money on there — I had done some sports gambling before) and tried some MTTs, doing well (lucky, I now know). I kept at it, winning what I consiered a fair amount.

I can't beat cash, though — I've tried 200NL,a and am not a winning player there, and I can't bring myself to take lower stakes seriously even thought that's silly. SNGs never seemed right; I did the DON's for a while on Stars but they toughened up a lot.

One POGger has offered to coach me and I suspect I could work out how to win, but I think it's time to move on from the poker life into something more stable, so I'm keeping away from it for now.

This spring I started losing. I assume it's because I was having trouble staying focused — focus and lack of tilt, plus basic logic, are really what I bring to the table, so losing that was very big. I quit for he summer, and have barely played since.
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Old 11-16-2009, 04:49 AM   #416
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Re: The well: atakdog

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How did you come across Pog?
Missed this one, sorry.

One of my trainees (I taught him to teach) had been telling me about playing microstakes, and he and mentioned 2p2 at one point. (He's the only 2p2er I know irl; he is not a POGger.) When I started playing I wound up checking it out after a while. I never got much involved in the start threads, but soon after I found the site I wondered what "other games" meant. there was a signup for a werewolf game. I looked; I read a couple old games; I signed up; I played; I was hooked.

I was seer, obviously. (not kidding) The strategic implication of seer play, particularly as we had two seers and at one point I peeked the other one, may have had something to do with how quickly I got into it.
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Old 11-16-2009, 05:03 AM   #417
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Re: The well: atakdog

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thoughts on the whole concept of law school in the US? the way it works over there seems completely alien compared to how it does over here where generally you learn it as an undergrad and then just do one year postgrad getting the whole vocational side in order to practice. seems too long.
Well, I think everyone accepts this on some level (except Elliot, who apparently got more out of it than most). But we have such a surfeit of lawyers anyway, this may be the only way to keep the numbers reasonable. the alternative, lowering the number of accredited schools, is infeasible.

I will say that I learned some great stuff i the last two years of law school (fed courts ftw) — but it absolutely didn't justify the additional two years. One year, perhaps.

Funny thing: I dated a woman who did hiring for the supreme court of Texas. She told me that she had given up hiring people from Yale law school (the highest ranked school on most lists), because they never knew how to do anything — they basically knew nothing but theory,a and couldn't even easily learn to put it into practice. An exaggeration, I'm sure, but that it was her perception is interesting.
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Old 11-16-2009, 05:17 AM   #418
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Re: The well: atakdog

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most memorable mish-mash game? preferences as to game size/composition?

dream wolf team?

what one thing would you go back and tell yourself at the age of 10 if you could?

how many five year olds?

re: bridge, what one thing would you advise for someone who understands the basics but wants to improve their game to the next level?
The mishmashes all roll into one. I loved force lightning, but I was barely engaged through most of that game as I was moving and completely distracted. And of course rest... boom.

But I guess my favorute was Jurassic Park, where as a sewer-peeked velociraptor (a wolf) I claimed T-rex (another wolf), sufficuiently confusing matters that the wolves won the next day, I think it was.

The Matrix was pretty great too, even though we didn't win — bobman screwed me by unintentionally outing me (godfather) with his play as a neutral, but I still almost pulled it out and talked the village out of lynching me.

I love vanilla 21ers, frankly. In mishmashes, anything over 30 is unweildy ad even that is a problem with the volume of posting we see these days. I ahev trouble keeping up, and unfortunately my solution is to coast early, truting that I may get night killed early and I'll never get wagoned until quite late. this is bad to do, but it's reality.


Dream wolf team: I want ScottHoward (any one of them). I want shortline even though I've never seen him wolf. I think I want ZeTurd. I think I can work with that team. And we need someone who's just always villagery — I'll go with a dark horse and take AndyNan, whose wolf game I just saw from the moderator chair and it scared me a bit — I want him before everyone else figures out that he's a really good wolf too.

Whoops, was that out loud?


Tell myself at 10: You want to be normal, but you can't be. Accept who you are. (Plus, tell Mom to tell the shrink you're bipolar.)


Five year olds: a lot. My pain tolerance is essentially infinite, I am not in great shape now but if I can do crew at two colleges even though I'm not technically fit enough, I can keep moving in a death match, and I have just enough martial arts (tae kwon do) experience to make rapid work of them. Eventually, though, my shoulders (they're both bad) would give out. Maybe 100.


bridge: Learn to imagine everyone's hand. Don't make a hard decision until you can see a hand that makes sense given everything that person has done — then ask yourself whether with that hand, he would actually have done something different at some point. (Works in the auction, defense, and declarer play, and helps get the player to begin to count.)
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Old 11-16-2009, 05:23 AM   #419
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Fan of literature?

Do you enjoy etymology, or did you learn most of the words that you know through teaching tests?
Not particularly. This makes me feel uncultured and sort of illiterate, but I'd rather have a science textbook or a bridge magazine most of the time. Ive read my Shakespeare and Tolstoy and Faulkner and such, and liked them, but it's not a part of a typical month by any means.

I don't think about etymology much, though I think it's back in there somewhere. And I didn't learn any vocab while teaching (actually, I think I had forgotten palimpsest, a GRE favorite, until I saw it in our book). I've just always known words.


_______________


I'm going to have to call it a night, I'm afraid. And I have class all morning tomorrow, so I'll still be behind for a while. I apologize to those whose questions I haven't addressed yet, particularly those asking for personal advise (test taking and werewolf, for the most part). I'll get there, I am just having a hard time shutting up.

Again, to anyone taking the December LSAT: get the most current practice tests available from LSAC, now. I will give you your plan of action by the time they arrive.
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Old 11-16-2009, 06:07 AM   #420
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Pretty much every woman I know, myself included, has dyed her hair red at some point. Blondes, brunettes, it doesn't matter, we all want to try red at least once.
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us too
lol. qft
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Old 11-16-2009, 06:10 AM   #421
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Originally Posted by atakdog View Post
Eyes glued shut, and chuckle inwardly at having duped whoever imposed it. Sometimes I walk around in the dark, inside and out, with my eyes shut (for some reason I don't do this in the day) for long periods just to work on my other senses. When I lived in rural Pennsylvania I went walking in the woods at night most nights, and my night vision got very sharp — but on monnless or cloudy nights, sometimes it was impossible to make one's way by sight, and I learned not to run into trees by listening for the echo of my breathing (I think it was). It also sharpens the other senses. So having my eyes glued shut wouldn't even by bad, it would be a new adventure.

It was on one of those night walks, pretty recently, that I found foxfire, i.e., bioluminescent fungus. (This isn't really rare, but it was new to me.) It was so dark that I could not even see the trees silhouetted against the sky — but as I walked along the (dirt) road (which I was following by theose echos, and by the change in the feel of my footsteps as I worked my way from shoulder to middle of road and back), about a half mile from the farmhouse, I saw something glowing in the sky. It turned out tobe a little constellation of fungus of a decaying branch.

I had no idea what if anything I would find that night — I was just walking. Much of life is like that.
I really like this story. I'm from rural PA, and I've had a couple of somewhat similar experiences - trying to find my way back to camp during a storm, ect.
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Old 11-16-2009, 06:12 AM   #422
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Originally Posted by atakdog View Post
I don't need global warming for any of that. I have personally seen, in my lifetime as a birder, numbers of birds at Point Pelee (a formerly wonderful migrant trap in extreme southern Ontario) drop by more than half, and I know that it had dropped by a greater percentage before I started birding. I know that the spring migration have advanced by more than two weeks in some spots, and that's probably our fault (Occam's razor, basically), but even if it isn't I know for certain that we are directly responsible for thousands of extinctions every year.
But one thing that we've known probably since the victorian era, is that animal populations are massively unstable over even quite short periods of time. One assumption that you have to get over in the whole debate is that there is some baseline that mankind if forcing environments away from. The reality is that the world, and subparts of it, are in constant flux, and that mankind is but one (new) force in that mix.

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Originally Posted by amplify View Post
What book would you recommend for someone mildly interested in identifying the birds of California? There are a fistful to choose from. I am not interested in details, but just, that's a starling, that's a Stabbing Hoosiwhatchit, etc.
if it comes at you with a knife, i doubt it's a starling.

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Originally Posted by Nicholasp27 View Post
so you believe that the studies showing that underage drinking causes brain damage are incorrect?
I do. And by way of evidence, i submit France. Although, de Certeau, Foucault, Levi Strauss... maybe you have a point.
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Old 11-16-2009, 06:12 AM   #423
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Re: The well: atakdog

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Originally Posted by gusmahler View Post
QFT about the eyes. I don't even know the eye colors of people of good female friends I talk to every day (well, used to, in my old job).
+1. I don't even know how many times a girl has gotten upset that I couldn't remember the color of her eyes.
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Old 11-16-2009, 06:37 AM   #424
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Re: The well: atakdog

You said earlier that the trend toward large mish-mashes is creating a large group of players who are experienced but who aren't really learning the necessary skills to become better WW players...

What size game do you think is best for learning those skills?
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Old 11-16-2009, 06:46 AM   #425
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Re: The well: atakdog

atak. One of my fav games was that vanilla game where a n1 kill of nich cleared you to me but no one else really believed it. I spent the whole game trusting you and you turned out to be the seer and led the village to a landslide victory.

Then in NASCAR I learned the value of loosely calling you a wolf the whole game (although I did actually suspect you for most of the posts that I said I did) so that the wolves leave you alive.
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