The other eligible contestants did not submit their second chance libs, and it's been a week so I'm going with what I have.
Personal Ad by Zurvan
I enjoy long, SCIATIC walks on the beach, getting SMOOSHED in the rain and serendipitous encounters with VIBRATING MATTRESSES. I really like piña coladas mixed with ASTROGLIDE, and romantic, candle-lit SPATULAS. I am well-read from Dr. Seuss to LIBERACE. I travel frequently, especially to OXYGEN BAR, when I am not busy with work. (I am a SANITATION ENGINEER.) I am looking for BUTCHER SHOP and beauty in the form of a ZIMBABWEAN goddess. She should have the physique of ZSA ZSA GABORE and the LESBIAN of BOOTY CALL. I would prefer if she knew how to cook, clean, and wash my DIGITAL THERMOMETERS. I know I’m not very attractive in my picture, but it was taken 96 days ago, and I have since become more OVERCONFIDENT.
Personal Ad by Atakdog
I enjoy long, UNREQUITED walks on the beach, getting SHARPENED in the rain and serendipitous encounters with AVOCADOS. I really like piña coladas mixed with INK, and romantic, candle-lit TOWELETTES. I am well-read from Dr. Seuss to MARILYN MONROE. I travel frequently, especially to MT RUSHMORE, when I am not busy with work. (I am a SECRET SERVICE AGENT.) I am looking for BEAVER DAM and beauty in the form of a UZBEKISTANI goddess. She should have the physique of KELLY BROOK and the KNEECAP of HOLLY GOLIGHTLY. I would prefer if she knew how to cook, clean, and wash my LACROSSE BALLS. I know I’m not very attractive in my picture, but it was taken 14 days ago, and I have since become more IRIDESCENT.