TN is a mother and posts about her kids a lot, its hella tougher to target her for women hate abuse. I, however, am unmarried and ridiculously good looking. Who are the Internet lost boys going to pick for their target?
It also doesn't help that TN and I have different reactions to this stuff, where she gets hurt and upset and usually leaves, I will fight back. And we all know how much the Internet tough guys hate that.
I don't post radically differently from a lot of other people on this forum, but I'm the target of significantly more abuse, and oddly enough, that abuse is 99 times out of 100 deeply tinged with sexism, if it's not just overtly sexist like quarrr.
These things are not actually my problem, I'm not a worse person for the things misogynists say to me.
Okay so we're going to take many more hours off in here, but in the meantime, here's some fun reading:
1. Sexual Harassment. What Quarrrr posted is not okay. kcaw diminishing it is just kcaw being wrong, as he is entitled to be, but I want to make sure we're all clear that he is wrong. It is not, and it will not be, acceptable on this forum to openly post about your sexual desires for other posters. I will enforce this no matter who the target is, which should be obvious, and should have been obvious, to all of you. No one gets to post "I would like to [do sexual thing(s)] to [poster's name]," or any variation thereof. You just get banned for that. It's not a gray area issue.
2. Re-posting of Sexual Harassment. Obviously I'm not going to be punishing anyone for this, but I deleted all the quotes and summaries. The reason we got rid of every quote or summary is that re-posting it and summarizing it just makes it linger longer, which prolongs the uncomfortable nonsense of having that post in our forum. To be as clear as possible about that, again, that post doesn't belong in our forum and posts of that type will not be tolerated in our forum. Go talk about it on Skype if you must re-live it.
Put differently, that post lingering as a meme or reference is ridiculously unpleasant for at least one user, and frankly it's potentially uncomfortable to any potential user as well. We are going to protect users from that form of harassment, which means we're going to ask that you not re-post or quote or summarize it, and we're going to actively remove it whenever it happens.
In short, POG is welcoming to women. We're not going to allow harassment of women to linger.
3. Leo. Leo is my boy, I like Leo. That said, Leo's post to CN was unprovoked and please don't come at me with some weird alternate narrative because you're just lying or totally unable to "tone read" at all. That was not tit for tat, and I reject the viewpoint that it was. CN posted a vanilla-level joke in context, Leo called her a bitch. Leo was not joking, and if you doubt me, just look at his first post back, where he decided to double-down. Those are unacceptable personal attacks, made for no reason. Don't do that.
The reason he was temped rather than infracted is that infractions tend to incite further bad posting, while a temp means the escalation effect cannot happen.
In short, Soah summarized this perfectly. Really bad timing from Leo, really well justified temp.
4. Mod Cooperation. I have the sense that many of you believe that we operate without talking to each other, or something similarly weird. We have each other's backs. We are also willing to consider and re-consider decisions. Moocher and I discussed Leo's temp last night, and Leo's temp was shortened today. That does not mean either of us think his posts "deserved" less or something. What it means is that the goal was presumably accomplished when he was temped for 24 hours rather than 3 days, and because we're not trying to do punitive justice, and because we're just trying to have the forum run properly, that should be fine. Not the best move to come in and drop another bomb, because it demonstrates that perhaps 24 hours wasn't good enough to prevent escalation.
So, in short, lobbying various mods at various times is obviously your prerogative and right, and I encourage you to keep doing it, but be aware that it's not like you get a sole audience before something happens.
5. Mod Criticism. Always welcome, and we reserve the right to take the good advice and to reject the bad.
6. POG Crisis Escalation. It is clear to me, as it has been for a long time, that the main POG flaw is that many POGgers revel in escalating POG disputes. It's lame that we even have POG disputes, but we do. When I view a conversation as plainly just a bunch of concern trolling and needless escalation benefiting only those interested in LOLPOG, I'm going to simply close the conversation, because doing that keeps people from getting banned and maintains a basic level of decent respect for the other posters. That's what happened today. This thread is staying closed for a while because I want to ensure calmness when it reopens.
7. The Crossnerd Issue. To be blunt, today demonstrated with near-perfect clarity how much many of you want her to be a source of conflict in POG, and her responses as usual demonstrated why she's such a fun target.
In any case, in BOTH incidents she was just the target of unacceptable posts by someone else, for no apparent reason, the predictable escalation began, and posters began trolling and counter-trolling (including her), the same as it ever was. If you think I'm white knighting for CN, that's totally fine with me, come at me, but it's going to continue because you don't get to come at any of our users on personal grounds for no apparent reason. And we ESPECIALLY dislike it when you jump in to come at people when the problem is beginning to get worse.
I take to heart the criticisms made by domer and UD, but with regard to domer he's basically going to bat for Leo's right to call a poster a bitch and Quarrrr's right to be just absurdly unacceptable and to sexually harass posters, and UD seems to think it was unfair that Leo can't drop the bitch bomb on someone he doesn't like. Fine, we disagree, but that's how it is.