And our secondary judges:
iraisetoomuch says:
I understand the criteria that Diab is going to use to judge this, and I’ll make that a part of it as well, but I’m going to go my own route a bit also.
1 Wine: Wine wins it all. If you’re willing to look, there’s a wine for everyone. From a deep flavorful Cab Franc to a light crisp Chard, you’ve got options. Pairs well with many types of food, socially acceptable, ages well, and can be easy drinking. The best part about wine is that most people
can't tell the difference between expensive wine and cheap wine. Everyone is an expert if they want to be.
2
Beer: Beer has it all from a flavor standpoint. You want coffee? Chocolate? Peanut butter? No flavor? Whiskey flavored beer? Bacon flavored beer? It’s all there. Points for that. But beer is generally worse for your health than wine, and had a certain negative stigma with many. Points for variety, affordability, ease of access, overall volume.
3
Vodka: This is where I will disagree with Diab on how we are ranking these things. Vodka on it’s own is very blah. Neutral, marginal, and just generally ok. But when mixed soda, juices, and other liquor you can make some great drinks, that don’t offend the pallet too much. That’s what most people are looking for when they buy Vodka. This coupled with the fact that even cheap Vodka still tastes reasonable makes it a strong option.
4 Whiskey: Despite my personal love for Whiskey, I know it can be harsh to some people. I’m going to temper my personal love for Whiskey with the general consensus to lack of excellence and leave this at number 4.
5 Rum: Easy drinking, a variety of flavors from light to dark (ugh), cheap, expensive, and everything in between. Rum is good, and even better during the summer outside. It is the basis for many mixed drinks, and has great sales volume across the country and world.
6 IPAs: I love IPAs. Complex flavor, rich notes, but they are often strong and powerful. As far as general appeal, they fail pretty greatly. There is a strong ‘love “em or hate ‘em” mentality. As a result, they cannot ever top the list.
7
Tequila: On it’s own, Tequila is pretty bad. Esp with lower quality tequilas. But when mixed into a Margerita, it gets significantly better. Add a touch of salt and you’re set for the pool. Loses points for actual taste, gains points for ease of drinking of summer time fun.
8 Cider: Cider is fine. I haven’t nothing against cider, and if I was given one for free, I’d drink it. But I will never order a cider, never seek it out, and would likely trade with someone to drink most anything else that is available.
9 Champagne: As a drink it self, it’s pretty sweet (I know it varies), light, often a touch fruity, and very easy going. When mixed 1:1 with Vodka (it was a weird New Years, don’t ask) it can be one hell of a drink and will knock you on your ass promptly. But aside from ‘Special Occasions’ I have literally never bought Champagne and I probably never will. I believe that the only reason that the Champagne industry still survives is that it has become common place at special events because it’s cheap and easy to drink.
10 Soju: Soju loses points here mostly because just have never tried it. It sort of falls victim to obscurity, but I’m sure it might be a good drink. Seems like its essentially unregulated Vodka.
11 Fruit Liquors: Fruit liquors have their place in the world. On their own, they are far too sweet, and I would never sip on them, but they can be used to mix. If this was a ‘essential thing you might need in a bar’ this would rank higher but here it just falls short.
12 Dark and Stormy: No, just no. This drink is everything that I do not like about drinks. Ginger beer is terrible, dark rum is bleh, and lime should not go into a mixed drink. Do not even get me started.