The example I used above was a term for "gay" that starts with an F. The whole argument can be applied I the use of the N word. People don't use that word because it is associated with a horrible past as well as with the color of someone's skin. There are so many words to choose from, why use one's that show your ignorance?

Oh and last thing, when people use the word "gay" or "f-g" around me, then find out I'm gay, why do they immediately apologize for saying those words when I didn't really care or mention it to them?

Interesting(?) story, then question.

As mentioned in this thread, I came out to my family (parents, siblings) 2 months ago as I now have a boyfriend. I just found out that my mom told her mom some time ago. I was worried about what she'd think (I remember years ago her saying that she didn't like Ellen because of "who she is"), but apparently she was like, "oh, ok" and was fine with it. I'm currently in my sister's house with my parents and other grandparents, and my parents told these grandparents while in the car without me. They were also basically just fine with it, though no one's said anything to me about it.

I wasn't sure how telling my grandparents would go, but it's really nice and easy when you have parents that will do it for you and absorb any of the weird comments you expect your grandparents to say.

Now for my question. I graduated high school 11 years ago, and I have not come out to any high school friends yet (though I do only see them like once a year at most). One of my high school friends is getting married in 4 months. At that point, I will have been dating my boyfriend for 2 weeks shy of a year. Do I bring him to the wedding, and do I tell anyone first?

I have a friend (friendly acquaintance?) that I didn't think knew I was gay, but could possibly have been told by another friend. The other day he said, "I know it sounds gay," then looked up at me and rephrased, "I know it sounds stupid, blah blah blah." Maybe I somewhat imagined this, but I took it as him using the word gay to mean stupid, with no bad intent behind it. But then he recognized that he took a word I identify with and used it to mean something negative, and especially because it came to mean something negative to put down those identifying with it, and so he realized it was offensive and corrected himself.

I was impressed that he's apparently trying to be less offensive. It was especially nice as just 5 minutes before a bunch of other friendly acquaintances were throwing around the 6 letter f word like they were in desperate need of a thesaurus.

If you have a +1 100% bring him and no need to tell anyone. How affectionate you are with him in public is down to you. If nothing else it will be a good platform to come out to your high school friends.

This. Although if you suspect your friends of being extremely conservative or whatever might be best to come out not in person...

Hi, I meant to post this a few days ago so need to apologize to rouch97 who emailed me.
I hadn't posted on twoplustwo for a few months and thought I was never going to again, so late one night I made the account totally_gimmick when I was depressed to say hi. Everything I said on my totally gimmick account is true and the things I emailed rouch97.
I would've posted itt sooner but for a few reasons:

1.) I have never been comfortable with my sexuality honestly and post on things like empty closets to discuss it. In addition to being from Kansas I also am more like a 5 or 5.5 on the kinsey scale but definitely MUCH more attracted to guys than girls. I want to be straight.

2.) I don't really feel like part of the poker community. I do play poker in my town and used to play pokerstars and full tilt and have played in vegas, but I dont travel the circuit or anything and dont have any big results. Im also mostly broke right now.

3.)As I type this I still feel like its risky to post here( I live/hide in a neat closet) and there is someone who is stalking me. but that guy already knows what he knows.

So anyway that's about it, sorry for posting on a gimmick that one time. Im 28 and about 5'9". I was lucky enough to have dinner with jmurder3 once when he was passing through Kansas and he is at least two-3 inches taller than me and a super nice guy

Bye!

Welcome to the thread!

Glad to see you are willing to take this little initial step out. I know Kansas isn't the most accepting of places, so, understandable to not be out.

That being said, coming out can relieve a lot of stress in your life, but no need to rush it! one step at a time.

Was my pleasure. G'luck in here. I think you'll find some helpful & supportive people & it might be really good for you.

& fwiw I've also met Protential & I am pretty sure you're taller than him, but I don't judge people by their sexual orientation or their height

Thanks for being so welcoming protential

fwiw some people do know im gay, like 6 or 7 people



but yes for the most part its a secret,I would certainly be categorized as in the closet and I hang out with some really conservative people.....

fwiw on height,I should say im 5'10" but dont. I am literally 5'9" and a half and purposefully wear work boots ( i work some crappy jobs aorn) and male ankle boots that make me look a bit taller so I often appear to be like 5'11" ish so im prob one of the tallest 5'9" people
The shoes I wear are pretty much strictly masculine; oxfords and sneakers and work boots.

Best of luck to you as you get more comfortable with yourself, Bryce.

You know it's not unusual for people to be generally attracted to both genders but identify as primarily gay or straight. But more to the point, maybe worry less about what label applies to you specifically, and focus more on becoming comfortable with who you are. Once you're comfortable with yourself, you'll meet someone who will be fine with whoever you are, gay/straight/bi/queer/etcetera.

At this point I'm much more comfortable with where I'm at on the spectrum of things than I am with myself for things that are only tangentially and or not related to sexuality . I am not the type of person who can say everything he thinks because everyone will hate me when I do

I'm not comfortable coming out though for a few reasons most notably because I'm still tied financially to my family.

What part of Kansas do you live in? My parents live in Hays and I visit them every now and then.

I disagree. I think the only reason to be against labels is because sometimes those labels are used in derogatory ways. 'Unsure' and 'curious' are labels too; a more definitive one is 'bisexual' as is 'gay', 'straight' or 'cis'. Knowing that you are a thing is reassuring.

Money is the worst reason to do anything, ever. Untie yourself, imo.

I currently live in Overland Park as for what wazz said I'm at work will respond sometime

Im pretty tired now but Wazz I didnt mean it that way. One time I really tried to be completely independent and I was homeless for two weeks...if my family wasn't there to bail me out.. I guess I just would've been homeless.... My family includes many of the people who are on a short list of people who haven't left me when I needed them and they give me money when I really needed it

Second just to be clear: im def mostly gay and much more attracted both romantically and sexually to males but there has been some attraction to females in the past. This is what I meant by Kinsey 5.

If I was top put numbers on it I'd say sexually I'm 70/30 in favour of girls and romantically 90/10 in favour of girls, those numbers do vary a tiny bit but it's still accurate for me to call myself bisexual

If I had to do numbers like that I would say I'm like 98% sexually attracted to men and 80% romantically attracted to men. Obv 2% and 20% for women respectively

Can you expand on

'I want to be straight.'

How can you like girls? They have cooties. Gross

boobies are ewwwwwy!

This is what this thread is all about! Guys just being guys!!!