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Poker Beats, Brags, and Variance Here's where you put your whines and wins.

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Old 05-04-2010, 05:18 PM   #2426
ComEriJanMD
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

^ you're not a skilled roulette player as well?
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Old 05-04-2010, 07:53 PM   #2427
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Thumbs up Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by noobsickle View Post
Mom: So are you going to play poker in Vegas?
Me: Of course.
Mom: I don't think you should. I don't want you to go all-in and lose your life savings.
Me: The max buyin $200. I can't lose more than that in a hand.
Mom: Why don't you just play slots or blackjack. You seemed to be very good at those last time.
Me: (facepalm)
Ha, my mother seems to think that online poker is directly linked to my bank account and that I could lose every penny I have in a single hand. I tried to explain how STTs work but I just got a warning that I should be careful not to lose all my money. /conversation.
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Old 05-04-2010, 09:11 PM   #2428
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

It's a PITA how older ppl don't get what a "bankroll" is, nor seems to get that it's not linked to ur bank acc or something.

Also, some don't get sngs\mtts.
- So, how much u pay to play on this things?
- $10
- What happens if u lose?
- I lose $10
- But can't u lose more?
- Only if I choose to play another one.
- See? I told u, u can aways lose more. Only the "house" wins...
- Facepalm.gif alongside headassplode.gif
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Old 05-05-2010, 06:29 AM   #2429
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Thumbs up Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

^ lol, that's almost word for word the exact conversation I had. I wonder where all these standardized misconceptions about poker come from.
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Old 05-05-2010, 07:44 AM   #2430
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

On my 21st birthday when Moses still walked the earth, my parents took me to Laughlin.

I brought 200.00 and sat down at a blackjack table. By about 9pm I had been throwing greens in to my parents slot buckets and had easily over 1500.00 on the table.

I was sitting down on 1st base and my dad decided to take the seat next to me causing a rift so Monumental that I lost all but 300.00

He then turns to me and says, "Maybe you should try poker".

And so it started...
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Old 05-05-2010, 11:12 AM   #2431
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

so i was just on a smoke break at work.

mate- "so how's the poker going?"
me- "not good, down just under a grand this year"
him- "but how much have you won?"

wat
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Old 05-05-2010, 02:32 PM   #2432
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by tower$ View Post
mate- "so how's the poker going?"
me- "not good, down just under a grand this year"
him- "but how much have you won?"
...and the universe collapses upon itself.
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Old 05-06-2010, 01:39 AM   #2433
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by tower$ View Post
so i was just on a smoke break at work.

mate- "so how's the poker going?"
me- "not good, down just under a grand this year"
him- "but how much have you won?"

wat
Unless your mate was a fellow 2p2er and could pull off a sick level, this never happened.
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Old 05-07-2010, 10:41 PM   #2434
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

At some college party having a smoke on the deck with my buddy. Random drunk kid comes out (brag - after I crushed him in beer pong):

kid - (just outta the blue, first sentence he says) - online poker is rigged, nobody wins. I know so many people who play and nobody ever wins.

me - people win, trust me.

kid - ya they say that, but I've never seen anybody make money.

me - I won a bunch in tourneys (didn't tell him I pissed most off in cash games)

kid - oh, (look of drunken disbelief, followed by long silence) - well my professor invented a system where he crushes roulette and blackjack at the casino.

me - unless he counts cards this is impossible.

kid - buddy u don't understand, this guy is really smart.



I'm about to go on a crazy drunken rant about how stupid this damn kid is - my brother knows this and looks at me shaking his head. I give up.

Also,

mom - some random comment hating on poker.

me - i'm up 90k in tourneys (...so shut the **** up)

mom - ya...but how much did u lose? (with a big smile on her face like she is a genius and I haven't considered this)

me - never mind (seriously thinking about making sarcastic ******* comment but i can't cuz she is my mom)
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Old 05-07-2010, 11:16 PM   #2435
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bacats32 View Post
the OP in ?, he is from one of said countries that does want tax monies.
Canada doesn't tax poker winnings. The IRS however takes everything.
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Old 05-07-2010, 11:52 PM   #2436
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mdv85 View Post
At some college party having a smoke on the deck with my buddy. Random drunk kid comes out (brag - after I crushed him in beer pong):

kid - (just outta the blue, first sentence he says) - online poker is rigged, nobody wins. I know so many people who play and nobody ever wins.

me - people win, trust me.

kid - ya they say that, but I've never seen anybody make money.

me - I won a bunch in tourneys (didn't tell him I pissed most off in cash games)

kid - oh, (look of drunken disbelief, followed by long silence) - well my professor invented a system where he crushes roulette and blackjack at the casino.

me - unless he counts cards this is impossible.

kid - buddy u don't understand, this guy is really smart.



I'm about to go on a crazy drunken rant about how stupid this damn kid is - my brother knows this and looks at me shaking his head. I give up.

Also,

mom - some random comment hating on poker.

me - i'm up 90k in tourneys (...so shut the **** up)

mom - ya...but how much did u lose? (with a big smile on her face like she is a genius and I haven't considered this)

me - never mind (seriously thinking about making sarcastic ******* comment but i can't cuz she is my mom)
I don't get it tho, you admitted you lost it all in cash games. So isn't she right? Seems to me stories like this are exactly why people ask us how much we've lost?

Mark
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Old 05-08-2010, 12:04 AM   #2437
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

But how much did you lose in cash games?
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Old 05-08-2010, 02:50 AM   #2438
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

"me - i'm up 90k in tourneys (...so shut the **** up)

mom - ya...but how much did u lose?"

Epic.
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Old 05-08-2010, 09:37 AM   #2439
kataruni ochiru
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobFarha View Post
I explained to my father how the money gets handled on the internet and cashouts etc..

Him: Ok, so they mail you a check if you withdraw it, but how did you put money on the website in the first place?

I whipped out a 20 dollar bill and put it into the disc drive and then hit the close button.

He got a kick out of that
Haha hilarious
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Old 05-08-2010, 10:07 AM   #2440
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NOSUP4U View Post
I don't get it tho, you admitted you lost it all in cash games. So isn't she right? Seems to me stories like this are exactly why people ask us how much we've lost?

Mark
yeah, this is definately one appropiate use of "but how much did you lose?"
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Old 05-09-2010, 06:02 PM   #2441
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NOSUP4U View Post
I don't get it tho, you admitted you lost it all in cash games. So isn't she right? Seems to me stories like this are exactly why people ask us how much we've lost?

Mark
guess so...but this was before i lost
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Old 05-09-2010, 07:21 PM   #2442
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Still, but how much did u lose???
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Old 05-09-2010, 07:44 PM   #2443
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Happy View Post
Confirmed no taxes.
cant tax losses
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Old 05-09-2010, 08:25 PM   #2444
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by spoonfox View Post
got a new one last weekend.


someone mentioned i play poker during a convo at the bar.

"you play like everyday?"
"ya"
"how can you afford that?"
"...."
Hilarious
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Old 05-09-2010, 09:33 PM   #2445
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mdv85 View Post
At some college party having a smoke on the deck with my buddy. Random drunk kid comes out (brag - after I crushed him in beer pong):

kid - (just outta the blue, first sentence he says) - online poker is rigged, nobody wins. I know so many people who play and nobody ever wins.

me - people win, trust me.

kid - ya they say that, but I've never seen anybody make money.

me - I won a bunch in tourneys (didn't tell him I pissed most off in cash games)

kid - oh, (look of drunken disbelief, followed by long silence) - well my professor invented a system where he crushes roulette and blackjack at the casino.

me - unless he counts cards this is impossible.

kid - buddy u don't understand, this guy is really smart.



I'm about to go on a crazy drunken rant about how stupid this damn kid is - my brother knows this and looks at me shaking his head. I give up.

Also,

mom - some random comment hating on poker.

me - i'm up 90k in tourneys (...so shut the **** up)

mom - ya...but how much did u lose? (with a big smile on her face like she is a genius and I haven't considered this)

me - never mind (seriously thinking about making sarcastic ******* comment but i can't cuz she is my mom)
You can only beat roulette if you count cards
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Old 05-09-2010, 11:03 PM   #2446
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Re: Why I don\'t tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by patgerrity View Post
reason to pretend that you dont play: I went to my college orientation, and my roomate decided to have a 5$ "poker tournament" wiht 6 other kids in our dorm room. Three of them being girls. I watched the "tourny" after telling them i didnt know how to play. It was then explained to me while being :coached: by the hoster why it is ok to call raises with 56 oop, because the raiser probobally has high cards, so he wont expect it if u hit a 5...

P.s. he didnt know what being oop was :/
the way i am interpreting this is: he says," it is ok to call with 5-6 oh-oh-pee because ther aiser probably has high cards, so he wont expect it if u hit a 5." then, did you proceed to ask him," what does oh-oh-pee mean?" and he could not tell you?
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Old 05-10-2010, 04:56 PM   #2447
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

If you actually pronounced it oh-oh-pee in real life then you're such a d-bag and I hate you so much
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Old 05-10-2010, 06:13 PM   #2448
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alkor31 View Post
You can only beat roulette if you count cards
Nice. I actually missed that when I read it
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Old 05-10-2010, 08:09 PM   #2449
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

The most annoying is when I see in their eyes .. well this guy should have gambling problem
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Old 05-10-2010, 11:00 PM   #2450
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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Originally Posted by DevinTheLegend View Post
If you actually pronounced it oh-oh-pee in real life then you're such a d-bag and I hate you so much
devin are you talking to me or the person who orginally posted this? if the guy said " you shouldn't play 5-6 'out of position'" and then couldn't explain what being 'out of position' meant, then that is one thing and is most likely what actually happened. the scenario i would be just totally baffled about is if the guy actually said "O-O-P" and did not know what it meant.
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