finally someone that understands
the worst is i give u 50$ and u make it into 1k
ok?
(i say no politely and think to myself come back when u add two zeros to the first offer)

"how do you know what to do since you can't see them bluffing?"

"why do you keep so much $ on there if you only play with $200 at a time?"

"is it real money?"
yes...
"but can you actually get it?"

"you know it's illegal and you should get it off while you can?"

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz i'm just done telling ppl I play poker and if ppl already know I'm not going to tell them how much I win/lose it's just so tilting. I'll say I sell drugs or something.

I just give a generic response along the lines of "doesn't really matter, some days you win, some days you lose".

did you not play the nit HU4ROLLZ?

Yeah, do this if you want the asker to assume you've gone busto

"You play online? I don't play online, it's not random enough. Big hands always come out."

I regret every minute of that conversation.

hahahaha, classic.

brians mum was shrewed imo

Pitbull Poker imo.

I think the new line that tilts me is when people ask how I deposit. What am I supposed to say? I don't? Is it that hard to understand that people who need to deposit frequently are generally going to be losing players?

The next would be people whose math education probably never got past algebra lecturing me on why I should cash it all out. It's like saying "hey, I don't know jack about whatever we're talking about, but I'm obviously more well-learned than you on the subject and it's a known fact that you will go busto." Thanks. How arrogant.

Of course, the top one for me is probably "if I give you $X can you turn it into $Y?" I'd never do this myself (nor would I condone it), but I thought the post where the guy said he just kept the $X was pretty funny. Maybe I could just treat my friend to a dinner worth $X. That would stop people from asking while also not being straight up stealing.

FWIW you should know some reliable deposit methods, so you can tell them to potential fishy customers.

I worded it incorrectly. It's not usually a case of "I want to play. Help me get money online.", but more of "How often do you deposit [in order to sustain your online poker habits]?" That being said, I have to agree with you that I need to get up-to-date with the current deposit methods. This is kind of sad, but when the recent $300 Stars reload came around, I was like "How the **** do the fish deposit? I want my bonus!"

Told one of my flat mates that I won a large amount in a donkament, my first big score since depositing $50, I had to tell someone I was that excited.

Of course the next day the entire block now knows that I play poker and have already been asked several times if I can double peoples $50.
Also, on a social aspect, no-one wants to play poker anymore for like £3 as "I'll just take it all".

^^^ has happened to me.

lmaof. Say them lets HU & if ur lucky than u get double up but if not than it´s time to reload..

I may as well talk to my pint of Guinness (he listens good but then he disappears after a while) if im talking to someone about poker who is trying to tell me that its like playing the lotto.

Irritates me so much

im just a micro grinder, but ive had at least one such occurance as here, not many though. I wasnt using jargon to make it understandable to a friend.


" **** man, I had the absolute best hand possible on the turn with a ace high straight. I went allin and the ****er caught one of six cards to give him a full house. Only 12,5% chance of that happening."

"Oh well. I hope you learned your lesson."


"Well, why wont I take that bet a hundred times and buy you a penis enlarger with my winnings."


He understood the concept afterward and laughed at my joke. Im not a douche like has been suggested, but he just took the pretentious route when he hoped i learned my lesson while in fact i was a dead on favourite.

Not a douche!

Im from Ireland Im great at talking Poker haha

If you talk about online poker to people in ireland they take it as an equivelant to Telly Bingo Twice a Week! (A show which consists of an Irish Cross-dresser pulling balls out of a hat!...twice a week)

And they think we've got a problem :S

are u talking about NL10

I told my sister I won a tourney ($30 entry) and hit for $1500 and she is like. Yeah I am on a big losing streak I wish I could win. Only difference is I am talking poker and she is talking slots. Sometimes I just want to strangle people.

lol

I told my Grandad I played last week, and to my obviously surprise, it actually turns out he grinds 5/10 and 10/20 on FullTilt.

He's a degen grown old btw, so now everything I see him, he whispers "how you doing on the ol' * looks around* poker. *winks*" My Uncle is money mad, he's currently seeing a 21 year old Uni student (he's 45) and he's friggin' made, he runs up debts, has **** all in his name, declares himself bankrupt, rinse and repeat, writes hundreds of thousands ££ of properties in his parents name, guy is ill. My mum thinks I'm gonna be like him, combined with my Grandad gambling everyday at the bookies, she says it's an illness and when she goes on about how it's lucky, she says she knows what she's on about and how I'm in denial.

FML.

wat

Grandparents were asking about stuff so I was trying to explain how sometimes you can make the right move and lose and gave an example of some hand I shoved flop with KK and guy calls with top pair and sucks out.

I mentioned something like "he took a really long time to call, so I was pretty sure I had the best hand". Their response - "he tricked you! He took a long time to call so you'd think his hand was weak and you fell for it."