In all honesty, I wouldn't want to talk poker with half of the posters in this thread. The other half I <3 dearly.

FWIW, if you don't answer the question of how much you won, you likely will never get the "but how much did you lose". Although on the rare occasions it comes up I usually laugh because of how cliche it is. Was playing live while tagging along on my gf's business trip and told her how my session went and a coworker overheard and interjected with our beloved donk question. I nearly spit out my drink. All my close non-poker friends are familiar with it too so it's always a good laugh when the person who says it doesn't understand what's so funny.

Nonetheless as many have pointed out we don't go asking how much other people's bonuses/raises/salaries were so they shouldn't ask us how much we made last night/month/year. Nor do I think we should volunteer that info when they ask - even if the result is sure to impress them. Of course I'm not rude and point out this when people ask me, I simply say I'm running good.

The gf and parents insist many of these people making conversation are truly interested and possibly jealous. In fact they have asked me to be a little more accommodating when they're friends ask me about it after learning about it from them. I typically just told people that my gf/parents were exaggerating and that I was really just in between jobs, working at home, etc. But the gf/parents have on occasion let it leak that I'm making more with cards than at my previous desk job and when forced to actually engage in conversation these threads sharing stories make an otherwise unbearable conversation pretty hilarious.

For instance, an excited former co-worker asked if he could officially say he knows a pro card player. He said he thought maybe, but since I wasn't on tv he didn't think so. So he inquired with me if he could possibly call me "semi-pro" or a "pro-am". lol wtf. I was dying inside. I told him that he was unfortunately correct and that saying I was a pro would be false since I haven't been on tv and if he really wanted to stretch it he could only call me a tax-basis pro since it's now my primary income. As someone else mentioned, these people aren't merely poker donks, they're donks at life.

I went out for drinks and wings last night with some friends, all of who are super supportive of my poker playing (one said jokingly 'professional poker player is the new rock star'). Anyways, one of them was like "I thought I saw you on the TV the other day for this Pokerstars tournament representing Canada" (I think this is the freeroll thing on Stars where you win an entry to represent your country and first prize is like a tuna sandwich). Another interjected 'ohhh man I can't wait to see you on tv someday! That's when I know you'll have really made it'. I just laughed and nodded.

Key footnotes that I did not mention:
-I don't play tourneys anymore and haven't for like 8 months
-I certainly don't play crappy freerolls
-Will probably never be on TV and thus am a failure at poker

Took the day off work today feeling bit under the weather and decided to fire up a bit of NL100 on FT.
My mum walks in.

Mum: Hmm. I hope you're not wasting loads of money on that?

Me: No, Look at my database here. I've won $744.55 in 1122 hands (ok so I'm new to cash games)

Mum: Oh..well that's not very good is it?

Me: What? I've won almost $750 in 1100 hands

Mum: Mmm...so out of 1100...what's a hand? Is it like a dip or something?



WTF Thankfully the phone then rang and our poker chat was over.

if the casino royale film was made now they should have definitely had bond and las frog HU and bond call down with 109 v le frog's 92 on 447k board or whatever the board was. that would have been much better ending.

or before bond went all in, he should have said "i dont think any of you have got the spades, i call"

Why I don't like to tell even my winning friends that I play low limit.

That line kills me.

This thread: gold. Amazing to me how many of the same stories I've experienced.

Years back I had this hyper-evangelical coworker who never missed an opportunity to tell me that what I was doing in the casinos was at once both stupid (because the house always wins) and immoral (because I was taking other people's money). Never minding the obvious contradiction between those two arguments, the typical encounter would go as follows:

I'm chatting with a different coworker (one who gets it) about my latest casino trip where some donk stacked off to my nut flush with middle pair no kicker when Jesus Boy overhears and butts in:

"You know, all those lights in Vegas aren't powered by the house losing money."

"That's true. Any game you play in a casino where the house pays you if you win is constructed to be in the house's favor."

"So why do you gamble?"

"I don't play those games. You wouldn't catch me dead at a craps table. In poker, I'm paying a fee, or rake, to the house to use their dealer, their table, and their security, so that I have a chance to take money from other players. Not quite the same thing. All I have to do to make money there is be better than the other players to the extent that I can cover that rake."

"All I'm saying is, the next time you're in Vegas, take a look at the lights, and figure out how much money they're spending every day to lure you in."

"I'm. Not. Playing. Against. The. House. What part of this are you not comprehending?"

"I'm just saying, most people with gambling problems are in denial."

"Yes, I have a gambling problem. My problem is that you won't stop bothering me about my gambling. Don't you have someone you could be pestering about evolution during your unproductive time? I've got a few bogus Second Law of Thermodynamics arguments I could feed you if you're running short. In the meantime I'm going to go spend my gambling winnings on hookers and coke."

Still, I've found that a surprising number of people "get it" when I take the time to explain it to them. Maybe it's that I was an engineer and tended to hang out with people who understood the math of it, at least at a primitive level.

Nobody understands my puns.

My mum just related to me she read this article in the Chinese paper how this 18yo kid who was a good boy lost like 100k gambling and then killed himself

So sick and so very gh3y

I still remember when 'low limits are unbeatable because of the rake' was the standard 2p2 line, and some guy (maybe bison? I don't remember) came in with like 100k hands of winning low-limit hold'em and SHOCKED EVERYBODY.

lol

So, did you invite him to play some heads up with you for decent money?

I would totally interrupt my mom so many times that she would have trouble telling that story.

"hang on, how could he think he was winning?" "didn't he wonder why he had to keep on depositing money to keep playing?" "Debts? How could he borrow money without noticing that he was losing money and getting into debt?" "Where did he borrow money from?" "would a bank really lend money to a kid so he could play internet poker?" "are you sure this is a true story, not some silly made up urban legend?"

"Do you wear the sunglasses & everything?"

You don't prey on the weak and gullible to take their money? I thought that was how money was made in poker?

Didn't you reply - "yep, pretty much". Sometimes the truth is the obvious answer.

Answer: "define professional - if you mean do I consistently make enough gambling to give myself a good income then yes, I suppose I am a professional gambler."

Good point, and its true, basically all the money comes from idiots, and I play against them every day

most of the people in this thread are sadly part of the problem.

no post secondary education, living with parents, no foreseeable prospects? make a trite rationalization for your past failures littered with words like "variance", "pot odds" and "long run" and you're well on your way to being a self declared pro.

??? that's quite a few assumptions. and we all know what assuming does...

I think you just assumed we all know.

all the time

that's what's up

Off topic but how much can live 3/6 limit be beaten for do you reckon?

$10 an hour? $15 tops? Just curious here

Am I the only person in the world who rarely has these problems when I say I play poker?

Having read this thread I can't wait for the day when I get to meet someone and they tell me they play poker for a living and I'll say all the cliche hilarious things about can I give him $300 to double t for me and that I play some poker too, and then when they ask me how much I get to tell them way higher stakes then they play... It will be glorious


IMO

First off I don't play for a living, but I am working very hard to try to reach the point where poker can bring in a comfortable supplemental income. I am a winning player, but not big enough wins at this point for me to start pulling from my slowly building bankroll. Now, of the people who know I am working toward this goal (who don't play mind you- LOT's of support from other poker player friends)-
-My father- every time I tell him I won a tournament or that I cashed out well at my cash game the conversation immediately turns to how "concerned he is about this dangerous habit of mine. Don't you know that people ruin their entire lives by gambling away everything they care about?" I have stopped trying to explain to him that I consistently win more than I lose and I have stopped expecting a positive response when I tell him what I have won.

-My friend Tracy- So you keep winning? Maybe you could just teach me to play too and I could quit my job. (No one ever had less potential in poker)

-My friend Jon- Do you ever do anything other than play cards? I'm worried about you. Not healthy.

-My mother- surprisingly positive. She has really encouraged me to try to make this work and loves to hear about every win.

Anyway, I'm not there yet, but if I can reach the point where the supplemental income can cut down a chunk of my bills that would be a huge step for me.