I usually just say that I have a different and more 'normal job', no need to rattle everyone's cage and face annoying follow up questions.

i've found that listening to the occasional recreational player's complaints about the time his flopped straight lost to a runner-runner flush is much easier than trying to lie my way out of why i'm 25 and working in a bar without being in college.

i'm proud that i play poker, but i don't talk about how much i win. the whole "rate" and "averages" thing is mind-bottling, even for someone with a college degree (apparently) :P

As long as people are trying to relate I can't hate them too much for it- if they're genuinely interested then I'll probably listen for a bit and maybe even give some advice too. What's annoying is the proportion of people who think gambler= degenerate, and basically tell you that you're naive to think any winning streak will last. Why anyone thinks it's any less appropriate to ask a poker player how much they make than to ask a plumber or accountant is beyond me as well...

It's funny though that we all probably used to talk up all our wins to make us sound like ballas and would love all the attention while we're at it. Now im guessing most of us downplay pretty much everything just to shut everyone up.
My most commonly asked questions in order, and the ideal non-commital responses:

1) How much do you make? "Yeah I go OK, it goes up and down though you know?"
... and if they press on:
2) How much did you make today? About $[insert some amount slightly lower than you guess that they make themselves], I mainly play for fun though.
3) But it's so addictive, how do you know you're not in over your head?. "Yeah you have to be real careful, I know a friend who... [insert made-up annecdote to make them realise that maybe, just maybe, you realize being a pro player may have an element of risk involved]"
4) You should cash it out now, before you lose it all. [If bothered, launch into a half-hour spiel about risk, variance, limits and how with good bankroll management its almost statistically impossible for a winning player to go broke. If not bothered...] "Yeah I just did... poker's fun and all but it's really not for me". Hope to God for no follow-up questions.
5) Online poker's all rigged. I played in a Pokerstars play money tournament the other day and my AK got beaten by Q6 twice in a row! Twice! Noone ever wins, they just make you think they do so you keep putting money in. [nope... still got no good one for this without sounding like an absolute tool]
6) "My dad lost his superannuation fund playing poker against people like you." [um... awkward silence]


What's your best non-commital responses, especially fool-proof change-the-subject ones... I actually need help on some of these

lol,only winning players here??

I play full time, and also am very involved in church.

Most amazing question ever:

"So do you struggle with porn too?"

The standard conversation is that I need to repent, I ask them why, they don't have any good reason. I explain to them that bible says nothing about poker, poker is not gambling if done properly, it is investing. THey just don't talk to me after that cuz they know I am right and they have no good argument, but don't want to change their opinion.

Everytime i bring up poker with one specific friend, who is actually somewhat smart we get into this conversation

Him: You know you're going to get upto like $xx and lose it in one massive hand right

Me: No, i will never play at a game where i dont have 30 buyins for it

Him: Whatever its going to happen

*goes back and forth for a while, nothing eventuates*

Him: So i'll give you $10 and you turn it into $1000

Me: WTF.


Oh, kinda off topic but i hate telling people what limits i play and why. They tell me how they can't stand playing below 50c / $1 or 1 / 2 with their 3bi roll and don't understand i can make more playing 25NL.
"oh i could never play that low, i wouldnt take it seriously"



In summation, whenever my friends ask about poker i give the simplest answers to avoid further queeries and never talk about it with other people who arent players themselves

"[15:26:33] friend says: just lost 30 AA to 44
[15:26:51] I says: bow chicka bow chicka chicka chicka bow"

i dont know how much i get this. when i come back from playing live poker rooms people are so denced to realize that people can actually make money and wont think otherwise. i told my dad about playing poker and he keeps on blabing on about what happens if u put too much at stake and it really gets annoying.

why I tell every one I know, so they can learn and I will take there chips till they Learn, lol
there is not many People in this isolated area, and I thought more of my work colleges would be more interested...
I just may retire and play poker as long as the new players come to lose, lol

I've never had trouble explaining the why the

"I'll give you $10 and you make it into $1000 ok"?

doesn't make any sense...isn't it really easy to say.

"Why wouldn't I just take my own $10 and make it into $1000? Or better yet my own $x and make it into $y at a rate of $z/hr without having to pay you anything"

Yep, but anyone asking you to take their $10 and turn it into 1k will never consider the fact you could make 100x as much as that playing with your own money

This thread, although fun as is, would have more potential if it turned into :

Stories of you telling some girl you play poker that ends up in sexycity.

Maybe this should be a new thread though, BBV4L.

This is my default answer to where the money comes from:

When u flip a coin u have a 50/50 chance to win/lose.
If u play for $1/flip and you flip about 100 times you'll be close to +/- 0.

All i do is searching for people who pay me $2 when i win the flip but only want $1 if they win.

9/10 people understand it.


bad-beat-story-tellers are the most annoying persons ever...


but the best of all are the 50/50 guys...

"wtf y did u call me?
i had flush draw.
u know u were a 4-1 dog?
lol i had 50/50... either flush comes in or not..."

...

thats what I do and everyone seems to understand... my guess is most people suck at explaining and try to getinto metagame or soemthing

Hahahahahahaha. This is great.
This is a very good analogy that I'll try to keep in mind next time anybody gives me [censored].

Great thread!

Last night I go downstairs at 6am having stayed up grinding and speak to mashed friends or friends in our living room.

them: "so you play poker?"
me (getting straight to the point) "yeah im addicted, but I manage to make a bit of money off it"
them "who do you play against?"
me "just randomes online"
them "what? REAL people!? how much do you make? 'bout 100 a week!?"
me (smiling inside at making alot more than 100 p/w) "I could win or loose alot in a week."

I will only tell family and friends what stakes I play and what my roll is on. No point telling randoms (unless they be hot chick)

I cannot belive the "give you $300 to double" one, I've never had that!

People always say I'm addicted to gambling. I try to explain how it's not based only on luck but they just don't get it.

It's okay, this is a safe place... You can be honest here...

this is like a standard conversation about poker here.

You gotta love the "Why aren't you on TV?" Question along with the whole "doesn't the house win in the end?" question.

I also love explaining to people the difference between cash games and donkaments and why I play cash games. It's also really annoying when you're with some friends at a home game and their friends know what you do and are amazed that you don't pwn them on every hand and because of this you "aren't even that good!"... right.

in any conversation after hearing you play poker.

"hey look at me, am i bluffing?"

...

couple nights ago i went to the casino with some friends. They asked me how much I win/lose at poker and I said on a bad day I might drop 500$ (2.5 buyins), on the best day I might win that or more. They looked at me like I was a total degen, I should never have mentioned I could lose $500 in a session which is completely standard at live 1/2

does anyone else get the "so are you really good at bluffing?" or "do you bluff alot?" question from people who have never played before?