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Old 08-28-2011, 12:41 PM   #3001
only nuts/better
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

3001
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Old 08-28-2011, 02:55 PM   #3002
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Titaniums View Post
"if I give you $100 can you double it for me?". I am sure this has been mentioned before.

"so how much do you net in every month?". I tell them it varies, some months I lose, some months I win, some months I am close to zero. "But what is your average percentage return from what you deposit?".

And my favorite:

One day when I was in Niagara Falls on vacation with a group of people, I decided to play some small stakes (1/2 NL) just for the fun of it because there was nothing else to do that early in the morning while everyone else was sleeping. Now I usually play 500 NL and high stakes tourneys and S&G's. Variance smiled on me that day as I got set over set, AK > QQ, and KK AI on QJT vs QT (hit K). Since everyone was not fully stacked, I only ended up making $350.

When my group found out they were like "wow that could cover the hotel expenses for the trip!" and "look everyone, he got lucky today, this means dinner's on him!" or "you should share the good fortune!"

facepalm.jpg

I almost felt like saying "why don't you share your next paycheck with me?"
Why don't I tell people I play poker? Because people like Tardtaniums also play poker.

Tardtaniums, you should have shared the wealth with the people who have to endure your presence.
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Old 08-28-2011, 04:35 PM   #3003
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Titaniums = new bg1?
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Old 08-28-2011, 10:51 PM   #3004
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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Titaniums = new bg1?
Much, much worse.

Some people were amused by bg1.

Literally everyone hates Tardtaniums.
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Old 08-28-2011, 11:04 PM   #3005
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Titaniums View Post

When my group found out they were like "wow that could cover the hotel expenses for the trip!" and "look everyone, he got lucky today, this means dinner's on him!" or "you should share the good fortune!"
dude, that musta been so ****in tilting lol.
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Old 09-01-2011, 02:44 PM   #3006
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

My mom called me to see how things were going:

Me: Good, I won 12,000 last week playing a poker tournament online.

Mom: Wow! That's amazing. I hoped you put it all to good use.

Me: I paid off some debt and left the rest online.

Mom: aren't you afraid of losing it all?

Me: No, I have been playing poker seriously for 3 years, and am a consistent winner. It has accounted for over 25% of my income.

Mom: (long pause) Well don't you think you've just been getting lucky?
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Old 09-01-2011, 06:12 PM   #3007
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

"Poker is just something you're born good at. Books won't help."

They just don't think people can get better.
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Old 09-02-2011, 05:18 AM   #3008
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by gangles View Post
Me: Good, I won 12,000 last week playing a poker tournament online.

Mom: (long pause) Well don't you think you've just been getting lucky?
Hmmmmm
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Old 09-02-2011, 08:57 AM   #3009
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by gangles View Post
My mom called me to see how things were going:

Me: Good, I won 12,000 last week playing a poker tournament online.

Mom: Wow! That's amazing. I hoped you put it all to good use.

Me: I paid off some debt and left the rest online.

Mom: aren't you afraid of losing it all?

Me: No, I have been playing poker seriously for 3 years, and am a consistent winner. It has accounted for over 25% of my income.

Mom: (long pause) Loldonkaments
FYP.
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Old 09-02-2011, 01:07 PM   #3010
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

WP PurpleNose.
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Old 09-02-2011, 04:13 PM   #3011
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Outside of the people I play poker one I dont like to tell anyone. They dont understand anything and it makes me feel dumber when I try to explain strategy to them
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Old 09-02-2011, 05:16 PM   #3012
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Re: Why I don\'t tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DMoogle View Post

My mom: "You won today? Withdraw it. Now. Before the government bans online poker and they keep your money so you can't take it out. What's to stop them from doing that?"
Always listen to your mummy
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Old 09-02-2011, 06:18 PM   #3013
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

My FAVORITE:

"How'd you do in your big tournament this weekend?"

"I did pretty well, didn't win, but I got my AA all in preflop against QQ to get beat, was pretty close to the bubble."

"You gotta play it safe to win those big tournaments, man. AA is just a pair, you shouldn't risk everything on one pair."

"Right. I gotta remember that."
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Old 09-25-2011, 01:04 PM   #3014
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by gangles View Post
My mom called me to see how things were going:

Me: Good, I won 12,000 last week playing a poker tournament online.

Mom: Wow! That's amazing. I hoped you put it all to good use.

Me: I paid off some debt and left the rest online.

Mom: aren't you afraid of losing it all?

Me: No, I have been playing poker seriously for 3 years, and am a consistent winner. It has accounted for over 25% of my income.

Mom: (long pause) Well don't you think you've just been getting lucky?
you earn ~2.5m a year? sick brag.....
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Old 09-25-2011, 11:22 PM   #3015
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

holy crap this is hilarious......i get this all the time from random people. on top of that i get some people trying to explain how government and all these online casinos are together and they are makin money from all of us and its all rigged. i m like stfu
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Old 09-26-2011, 01:36 AM   #3016
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheSalesman View Post
My FAVORITE:

"How'd you do in your big tournament this weekend?"

"I did pretty well, didn't win, but I got my AA all in preflop against QQ to get beat, was pretty close to the bubble."

"You gotta play it safe to win those big tournaments, man. AA is just a pair, you shouldn't risk everything on one pair."

"Right. I gotta remember that."
Replace this with "I went all-in over a button raiser with AJ and ran into AA" and "Dude, AJ is not a good hand to put your tournament life on the line with!" facepalm.gif
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Old 09-26-2011, 03:40 AM   #3017
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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Originally Posted by Wizard-50 View Post
Replace this with "I went all-in over a button raiser with AJ and ran into AA" and "Dude, AJ is not a good hand to put your tournament life on the line with!" facepalm.gif
Bro you got it in on an 80-20 and you call yourself a professional?
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Old 09-26-2011, 03:20 PM   #3018
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by rofl-copter View Post
double facepalm - when you want to use one facepalm but it simply will not suffice
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Old 10-06-2011, 01:04 AM   #3019
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

I always like reading over this thread every now and again, despite 99% of it being micro losing players its enjoyable nonetheless

Im not a major winner, nor do I play for a living, but my friends know I'm very interested in it and some of the curveballs they throw at you when trying to talk poker is pretty entertaining

I made day 2 of a tournament, mentioned it to a friend and he asked "so whats the big hand?"

"wut?"

They also grind some cash every now and again, dont understand why you cant take money off the table straight away when you win etc. The turn is the 'second hand' and the river 'the third hand'. But before you ask, the flop isnt the first hand, thats still a flop

"Its frustrating always getting hands like K3, flopping 2 pair and having to fold cause other people are always betting"

"lolwut?"

Plus all the usual degen stuff, "you've got the bug now!" or "the heaters over!" whenever you have a loss
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Old 10-06-2011, 03:04 AM   #3020
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Re: Why I don\'t tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DMoogle View Post
You're the one in a million...

My mom: "You won today? Withdraw it. Now. Before the government bans online poker and they keep your money so you can't take it out. What's to stop them from doing that?"
.
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Old 10-06-2011, 03:24 AM   #3021
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Re: Why I don\'t tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DMoogle View Post
You're the one in a million...

My mom: "You won today? Withdraw it. Now. Before the government bans online poker and they keep your money so you can't take it out. What's to stop them from doing that?"
wow, this was made before BF, smart mom
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Old 10-06-2011, 03:37 AM   #3022
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DMoogle View Post
You're the one in a million...

My mom: "You won today? Withdraw it. Now. Before the government bans online poker and they keep your money so you can't take it out. What's to stop them from doing that?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by furyshade View Post
You: these silly things called national and international laws keep them from doing that, but other than that nothing stops them
It's funnier when you include the next post as well
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Old 10-06-2011, 04:17 AM   #3023
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pog0 View Post
I'm at a birthday shindig, all the girls go off to the bathroom and I'm talking to some guy. He's talking about work (he picks up garbage off the streets... no joke) and then when the girls get back, one of them listening in is like, "hey, do you know what he (me) does for a living? He plays poker on the internet."

him: "oh, really?"
me: "yeah"

For the next ten minutes, I'm stuck listening to how he won $40 at a home game once and that he prefers pocket twos to pocket aces.

What negative experiences have you guys had when someone found out you play poker for a living and/or on the internet?

Lold irl :O, was at work ppl started looking at me :O

loled at the pocket 2's to aces part classic donkey style thinking.
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Old 10-06-2011, 04:34 AM   #3024
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

can i give you $50 to make me money wth?
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Old 10-06-2011, 05:00 AM   #3025
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

I remember a convo with my dad and his nephew which is like only 10 years younger than him. My Dads nephew deposited 50$ on pokerstars, and proceeded to play NL 50, he went up to like 75$ then he entered a hand, with pocket 3's which he says "i had 33" he flops quads, and gets his money all in on flop, other dude vs him hits runner runner straight flush, and he;s convinced that online poker is rigged :O.

So after this convo with them, this convo happens right after.

Dad: withdraw all your money now,

Me: yeah ok( was 12 tabling atm)

Dad: Im serious my nephew lost 50$ playing, and you will lose your money

Me: dad online poker isn;t rigged, your nephew played like for 1 hour and lost 1$, how is online poker rigged.

dad: he lost 4 of a kind on flop,

Me: yeah those things happen..like once in a blue moon but they still do.

Dad: okay dont ask me for money when you lose all of it on poker,

Me: ahahah we'll see.


gotta love the way old ppl that have no clue about poker think.
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