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Poker Beats, Brags, and Variance Here's where you put your whines and wins.

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Old 11-29-2010, 03:15 PM   #2801
WOLVER1NE
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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Originally Posted by supersplitz View Post
That's one question that's always on my mind. This really can't last for much longer IMO.
Everyone will be solid in a while or what?
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Old 11-29-2010, 03:16 PM   #2802
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

when i say i get some overtime work for a weekend i always get "you lost poker, didn't you"?
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Old 11-29-2010, 04:20 PM   #2803
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

"wow, thats a small amount to make in one summer."
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Old 11-29-2010, 06:15 PM   #2804
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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Originally Posted by mad_mardigan View Post
Aha! Now that sounds like a cool poker wife! Srsly, most wives/GFs are just like all the other posts describe: whiny bitchy nags.

Ive only come across a few couples like that, where the wife is mostly cool and supportive of poker. Mostly in relationships where the person who plays is also some sort of professional in another field: doctor, lawyer, etc.
My wife enjoyed your post. And yes, she is a professional. She has worked at the same hospital, starting with doing pots and pans in the kitchen, since she was 16 years old. She did that while she finished finished high school, then college.

Now that's grinding!
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Old 11-29-2010, 06:27 PM   #2805
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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Originally Posted by Alficor1 View Post
I love the "Do you play online poker as well? Where? [answer] I play on facebook" guys.. they always tell me how good they are and that they are up by [insert random number you consider to be big] chips.. they're so funny.
Here is my early history as a great poker player:

I thought I was hot stuff when I was making the final tables of 2,000 player MTTs on AOL World Series of Poker at least once a week.

Then I knew I was really good when I worked my way up the SNG levels on PokerStars.net until I had a bankroll of over half a million.

Then I made my first real money deposit ($50) on PokerStars.com, and after 3 months of breakeven play, I lost it all.
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Old 11-29-2010, 07:02 PM   #2806
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

i get this alot:

"OMG are you winning!?"

when i am playing a tourney with a few thousand runners. so annoying
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Old 11-29-2010, 07:16 PM   #2807
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Sitting on my couch grinding some tournaments the other day while my mother is in the kitchen and a friend of hers comes around

friend (to me): hey, what you doing?
mother: hes just playing some poker on the computer
friend: oh great i love poker! what do you have?! *friend insists on sitting next to me watching me play, expecting I would play every hand or something

I guess they got bored when I spammed the fold button the entire time they were there


My grandmother also 'loves' poker. 5 card draw to be exact and for play money only. Whenever she comes around now I am expected at least an hour of play money 5 card draw with her and my mother and of course she always wins
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Old 11-29-2010, 08:10 PM   #2808
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Post #71. If only he had known then.....
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Old 11-30-2010, 04:18 AM   #2809
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

New manager: "Oh you like texas holdem? I'm actually a semipro myself. I dont know how seriously you take it, but i'm a poker god to be honest. Do you even know the odds for A7 against KQ"

Me: no
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Old 11-30-2010, 05:22 AM   #2810
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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Originally Posted by Poker Clif View Post
Here is my early history as a great poker player:

I thought I was hot stuff when I was making the final tables of 2,000 player MTTs on AOL World Series of Poker at least once a week.

Then I knew I was really good when I worked my way up the SNG levels on PokerStars.net until I had a bankroll of over half a million.

Then I made my first real money deposit ($50) on PokerStars.com, and after 3 months of breakeven play, I lost it all.
I wish my friends who keep bragging about their facebook poker winnings would deposit...
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Old 11-30-2010, 01:28 PM   #2811
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Quote:
Originally Posted by King Fish View Post
Them: I love watching it on TV. Were you ever on TV?

Me: Yes.

Them: Have I seen you on TV?

Me: I don't know. You tell me. The screen only works one way.
ROFLMAO. Not getting enough love IMHO.
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Old 11-30-2010, 01:42 PM   #2812
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Poker is not the only subject about which members of the general public will make incomprehensibly moronic statements.

Life n00b, after finding out that I used to date a woman that I met on a dating site:
"Can you really meet women like that?"

Me: "No, I actually dated a blowup doll for three months. Don't tell anyone."

Life n00b, after finding out that I used to work for AIG:
"Did you get a bonus? HAHAHAHAHA" (laughs loudly as if he is not the 563,521,698,223,185th person to crack this joke)

Me: "Yes. That's why I'm balling in this Subaru and Tommy Hilfiger knockoff."

Life Asstard, who knows I once worked for AIG, and was just told by a friend that I am headed to the Borgata for a tourney:
"I see that you like to gamble with taxpayer money." Guffaw guffaw knee slap snot bubble blowage drool dribble spit.

Me: headasplode.gif

Last edited by DrewOnTilt; 11-30-2010 at 02:05 PM.
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Old 11-30-2010, 03:41 PM   #2813
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

^^^ wait, so how big was your bonus?
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Old 11-30-2010, 04:17 PM   #2814
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DrewOnTilt View Post
Poker is not the only subject about which members of the general public will make incomprehensibly moronic statements.

Life n00b, after finding out that I used to date a woman that I met on a dating site:
"Can you really meet women like that?"

Me: "No, I actually dated a blowup doll for three months. Don't tell anyone."

Life n00b, after finding out that I used to work for AIG:
"Did you get a bonus? HAHAHAHAHA" (laughs loudly as if he is not the 563,521,698,223,185th person to crack this joke)

Me: "Yes. That's why I'm balling in this Subaru and Tommy Hilfiger knockoff."

Life Asstard, who knows I once worked for AIG, and was just told by a friend that I am headed to the Borgata for a tourney:
"I see that you like to gamble with taxpayer money." Guffaw guffaw knee slap snot bubble blowage drool dribble spit.

Me: headasplode.gif
But how much did your investors lose?
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Old 11-30-2010, 04:28 PM   #2815
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

No $ in AIG, it's all in poker community now.
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Old 11-30-2010, 05:15 PM   #2816
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They lost all of it on a bluff shove with no equity.

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No $ in AIG, it's all in poker community now.
This is also true.
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Old 12-01-2010, 05:49 AM   #2817
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

I don't know why you guys keep laughing about people saying you count cards in poker.

Here is an excellent strategy article which explains how to count cards, taken from a poker site. The maths may be a bit hard to follow, but if you've read Sklansky, you can probably follow it well enough.

http://au.888.com/poker/how-to-use-c...oker-strategy/

"You may have heard the counting cards when playing poker can actually increase the level or profit you make. While this will differ greatly from player to player and game to game, it is important to just give it a try. But, if you have looked for information on card counting before, you know that there is very little helpful information available on the subject.
Here is a basic primer on counting cards when playing poker that will help you get started in the right direction!

Math
The essential concepts of counting cards are all based on math. The goal is to use as much information as possible to determine what the chances of you winning your poker hand is in relation to the size of the jackpot and how much more you have to contribute to stay hand. This sounds quite simple, but card counting is a lot more difficult than this, and takes a lot of knowledge and skill to pull of successfully on a consistent basis!

Overall Strategy
One thing that you can’t afford to forget is that card counting is only a small component of a successful poker strategy. You can’t make money just counting cards alone – you need starting poker hand strategy, a betting strategy, and a few more components along with card counting to make a complete system. If you try and play Omaha hi or Texas Holdem by just counting cards, there is a good change you will not be profitable!

If you know what you are doing, counting cards when playing Texas Holdem and Omaha hi online is not that difficult. As long as you know when the correct time is to implement it in your overall poker strategy and don’t forget to play correct starting poker hands, it can’t hurt your game. If you log into your favorite online poker room or any of the other poker sites you have an account with and try out poker card counting at the play money tables, you will soon see how this technique can really help you win online poker tournaments and other poker events!"
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Old 12-01-2010, 06:23 AM   #2818
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

Was playing Sunday warmup last week, mother decides to sweat me while im eating lunch (brought laptop into kitchen). I get all in with 88 vs A10, flop is A1010 , mom is screaming at top of lungs for an "8" crossing her fingers etc throughout the whole hand , turns an 8 whilst im drawing stone dead , river blanks out. Mom gives me huge hug and kiss.....telling me how she brings me so much luck every time she watches me, lol.
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Old 12-01-2010, 11:48 AM   #2819
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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turns an 8 whilst im drawing stone dead
no
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Old 12-01-2010, 01:46 PM   #2820
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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no
yes
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Old 12-01-2010, 01:52 PM   #2821
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

lol
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Old 12-01-2010, 02:23 PM   #2822
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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Originally Posted by ArmenH View Post
Was playing Sunday warmup last week, mother decides to sweat me while im eating lunch (brought laptop into kitchen). I get all in with 88 vs A10, flop is A1010 , mom is screaming at top of lungs for an "8" crossing her fingers etc throughout the whole hand , turns an 8 whilst im drawing stone dead , river blanks out. Mom gives me huge hug and kiss.....telling me how she brings me so much luck every time she watches me, lol.
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no
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Originally Posted by AlmostFamous View Post
yes
too many nooobs. He is not drawing dead!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nice fake story though!!!
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Old 12-01-2010, 03:22 PM   #2823
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

The burn card was an 8. He was drawing dead.
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Old 12-01-2010, 03:27 PM   #2824
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

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too many nooobs. He is not drawing dead!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nice fake story though!!!
yes
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Old 12-01-2010, 03:30 PM   #2825
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Re: Why I don't tell people I play poker.

convo with my mom yesterday

me: im going to play poker for income for the next 6 months until my summer job since I make more than I would at a regular part time job.
mom: no you should get a real job!
me: it is a real job you wouldnt understand
mom: you're luck is going to run out jacob!
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