ive had 4 friends play on full tilt because of me and they have all said this. i want to stick a fork in their eyes

I was golfing with my brother and 2 friends this weekend and of course my brother has to mention my recent mtt successes, and one of the guys asks if he can back me or buy a piece and I say yeah but it would be in a 10k event, and he didnt respond (and that is kinda funny cuz hes a balla and has a decent chunk of monies in the stock market)

"Do you actually trust poker online?"

I used to laugh off tards that were like "other people have programs to see your cards". But now........

Working at a casino luckily all my poker dealer buddies are competent enough to talk to, but its getting a bit out of hand with them asking me how much I win/lose. They seem to only remember the wins, because when I told my buddy that I'm now reasonably short-rolled for 5/10 he seemed to think I'd taken up drugs and lost my roll or something till I explained some variance to him.

Worst of all though is one of my coworkers is the worst degen gambler I know, and since I get asked about my winnings at work he actually asked/told me he was going to work my shift Monday cuz he needed money...like its my fault I'm a winning poker player and you're blowing your brains out every night on blackjack?

I think ill keep it to a simple

Them: Howd you do?

Me: Good/bad

Them:How much?

Me: enough.

I never know what to say when people are randomly like "so how much are you up today?" and I won like 3k or something, seems awkward to tell the truth.

I'd be embarrassed if i was a SS too.

oh snap!

My first year of college when I first started playing poker I thought I was the **** because I made $1000 over an enormous sample at 25NL and a big $5 MTT cash (I was terrible obv). I would brag to everyone and LOVE to answer questions about winnings and buy people drinks/meals sometimes, etc.

Two years later, when people ask why I went to Costa Rica in May and am going to Uruguay in a couple weeks (LAPT ldo) I just say meh travel. Now I'm a decent midstakes reg and avoid talking about poker at all costs. I can't believe how bad of a "that guy" I was. Embarrassing.

i try to explain to them about how what i make in one day doesnt mean I make that everyday.

Like I told my best friend about my 10k day in june just because I was excited and it was my first 5 figure day ever, and then the next weekend at a house party everyone kept asking me "wow you make 10k a day playing cards???"

I tried to explain that I was on a 4k downswing the month previous so it was like I made 6k in a month which isnt astronomical, but they still coudlnt get over the 10k a day thing.

I recently found out a workmate plays poker and started talking to him about it. A few minutes later I find out he plays play money...

Then he procedes to laugh at me for playing "on those 50 cent tables".

I got a laugh out of it.

I dislike telling people about my poker endeavors. I don't play for a living, I consider it an extra source of income. Only about 3 people know how much I play. There have been a few instances where they will tell some stranger about how I am a ballin' poker player.

It is just straight up embarrassing. I only made about 18k last year playing poker and my "real job" is a cook at a restaurant. Not "baller", just embarrassing.

Wow, that is weird, that is virtually exactly my situation..except the cook part

Eventually the casino will get all our monies imo

Yeah, well imagine the looks you get when you tell people you cook at a restaurant after your friends blatantly lie and say you play poker to pay your bills.

i was out to dinner with the CEO of my company (i'm an intern) and everyone at the table was talking about poker and this one asian was like hey my bf plays in atlantic city in small tournaments....i said i played (big mistake) and then the conversation just went downhill when the CEO was like what limits do you play...**** me

A conversation I had last week with the pastor of my parents church:

Pastor: "Good to c you! How're you doing?"

Me: "Meh alright, trying to get back used to the real world."

Pastor: "Where have you been that's unreal?"

Me: "Vegas"

Pastor looking concerned: "Oh yeah, how was THAT? What were you doing out there?"

Me: "Playing poker. Went out there with some friends for the WSOP."

My Dad (who I hadn't noticed right behind me) trying to play it off to avoid embarassment: "He thinks he's going to get on TV..."

Pastor, now looking gravely concerned: "So... how much did you lose? You didn't lose all your money did you?"

Me: "Nope quite the opposite actually. My friends were telling me I was running like god."

lol at this, well played.

Is the guy's name Martindale?

wp, sir

Who the **** is Martindale? You mean Martingale?

I haven't read much of this thread buuuut I'm actually pretty impressed that for the first page and a half there were barely any strangers with 3 posts talking about how they have to tell people they play professionally.

Also i obv don't have many stories since im a microgrinder but when i stayed with this family in england i played a fair bit (just started, was playing like $5 sng's lol) and the conversation with their mum went like this:

Mum: I'm a bit concerned that you're playing online poker with actual money
Me: Why
Mum: Well because the house always wins
Me: You don't play the house in poker, you play other people (i obv left out the rake to not confuse her)
Mum: Yeah but the house will always end up winning
Me: Um, but yeah the house doesn't play against you so it can't win (again obv leaving out rake)
Mum: My father made his living off people betting off sports. He knows how these things work. The house will always destroy you.

It actually went on for like 5 mins straight and I was like whatev im gonna go lose more money to the house

I used to tell people how much money I made, etc, but it started to get annoying because I had to tell it like 234234 times a day and it began to feel like bragging when I started to win bigger amounts.

So now I keep numbers to myself, and everyone thinks Im broke because Im so quiet.

you are much better off with them thinking you are broke.