Was talking to brother in law and mother in law about poker when bro in law starts talking how he's a legend in poker but even if your good you'll never win because of luck (which makes no sense but whatever) and he says I will never understand his coolers and I say well you might be playing bad. If that was true I couldn't be winning consistently nor could any pro. He says it's hardly a skill game.

So I calmly give him a situation, your 10BB deep in a tourney and are dealt QQ on the button what do you do? He quickly gets up and shouts FOLD OF COURSE he could have AA or KK! You don't know they haven't acted yet. He then gives out a big d-bag smirk and my mother in law smiles and says, "see, your not the only good poker player."

I got up just got up and left shaking my head.

^^ Phil Hellmuth teachings at work right there.

LMAO. That's priceless.

Yeah...

Im playing a video game at a friends house, there's poker in it so i go and **** around i push all in with with Top Top and the computer player calls with a gut shot. Obv I loose, friend says "i thought you were good at this" face palm

lol @ pushing w/ tptk

It depends.

And they say there are no benefits that come with a job like poker

"So, like... You know how to count cards?"

Red Dead Redemption obv

LMAO, RDR Rigged!

you guys have the patience to play that poker without cheating?

Epic thread. That said, am I the only person here with reasonable family?
Dad thought poker was something along the lines of 5-card draw versus the house, and was worried when I told him I play a decent amount of poker.

Dad: How do you make money playing poker? Doesn't the house always win unless you're cheating like counting cards in blackjack?
Me: No, you're playing other players, it's my money versus their money, the house isn't involved.
Dad: So why would a casino offer the game?
Me: They still make money - the house just takes a rake [realizes he doesn't know what a rake is]...Essentially they just charge all the players a small amount for the right to have a nice, safe, trust-worthy place to play poker.
Dad: Oh. That makes sense. So as long as you're better than the other players, you win money, minus whatever the casino charges?
Me: Yes. [Wow that was easy].

And one Sunday when I visited him, poker came up again (since I had played the day before), he asked me how I did and I said it was a bad day, I lost $400. He goes "So the guys were better than you yesterday?", so I was at least happy that was his reaction, but then I began explaining about how my all-in bet with top set got called by a flush draw that hit...then realized that would be fruitless since he still thinks it's 5-card draw, so I went with this:

Me: Basically, I outplayed the guy such that we both put our money in a situation where I was about 70% likely to win and he 30% - this one time, the 30% happened.
Dad: Oh, so it's like the stock market - all you're doing is trying to put your money in favorable situations, and as long as they work out more often than they don't, you make money?

Having heard all of the horror stories of family members freaking out when it comes to poker, I was amazed.

Brag aside, I will contribute to the thread with my personal "how I explain poker to complete morons who think it's degen gambling". I go by over-simplifying poker to "The skill is trying to outplay the other guy such that you're putting your money into situations where you're better than 50% to win" (this of course ignores things like chasing draws when the pot odds are there, but it works). If this fails, I go with this:

Me: Okay, how about this - we'll flip a coin 100 times. Each time it lands on heads, you'll pay me $2, if it lands on tails, I'll pay you $1.

When they realize that, barring extremely bad luck I'm going to make money in that situation, I basically say the skill in poker is outplaying the other guy so that he's putting his money in a situation like that.

It's grossly over-simplifying the game, but honestly I've rarely had any problems. But then again, I don't talk about how I play online as well, just live, so maybe that helps.

Also, my brother's only thoughts on poker were that sunglasses should be banned - "If you can't control your eyes then tough ****", and he legitimately wanted to know how I don't give away massive tells because I fidget ALL the time.

Danger Will Robinson, Danger!

I have a tell that I have to watch. I have ADD, and I'm naturally very fidgety. When I get a big hand, I often stop fidgeting and sit up straighter.

It's a common tell, players with a big hand tend to "freeze" so they don't get excited and give away the strength of their hand. Check yourself for that one.

I tell one friend I play poker and before I know it they tell someone else who eventually ends up asking me dumb questions that I do not want to have. better to keep your mouth shut.

Friend: You make money playing poker? Do you count cards?

Yep. My solution is just to keep my left leg moving at all times. Just a consistent shake of the left leg that doesn't change regardless of hand strength.

http://daleroxxu.blogspot.com/2009/1...out-poker.html

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBABP1pUB18

lol jaimegoldaments

Asides from the usual "How much did you lose" and "Can you double $50 for me"

-What are you up to?
-Playing Poker
-OMG how much are you losing / how are you doing ?
-I'm up $2000 for the day
-Oh wow, where's my share? / Where's my gift?

Or, on a trip when I stopped by at a casino and won $700 playing 2/5 NL in a 1 hour session....

Friends/family members I travel with:
"I hope you are going to share" or "Does this mean you will be paying for the dinner / hotel?"

I almost said something along the lines of "Sure, will you be sharing your next paycheck with me?"

That sucks because then you look like the jerk when u don't share with anyone lol

It sucks even more when someone from your side of the friends/family announces to the group or visiting family, "Let's go to that expensive place, James is gonna treat us upon his luck-filled day, right James?". captainpicardfacepalm.jpg

my fav is: how do u know ur opponents are real?

i often answer that stars is set up to cheat exclusively me and 3-4 other idiots and that boris becker is not a real person. thx god i am a genious, hacked their website and win anyway.

people who think they play against real opponents are the same that believe they really flew to the moon.

I like this thread. I thought I was the only one with not-wanting-them-to-know problems. Im happy to know there others like me.



Im also annoyed when ppl ask how much did I earn after an online session. I dont know about others but I dont really look at the cashier all the time to see how well Im doing.
So I dont really have an answer to give and I randomly say "about 200 or so..."


Also:

Me: "I ve running bad the last two month. My bankroll fell from 18K to 10K."

Friend: Omg, why you didnt withdraw the money!!! Now you lost it....

Me: ......



I recently told my mother that I play poker semi-professionally and what stakes I play in.
Replies have all been posted above ( MY SON!! YOU WILL END UP BROKE!!! etc.)

me: dad, I want to play poker for a living
dad: how are you going to do that you don't even have facebook