When are people going to realize that poker is a game of skill and strategy? It's much more than just cards and chips, it's about the people behind the cards and the chips.

How much did you make today?
Not sure, around $1000
Oh, neat. So you make $1000 daily.
Sigh

One time I won a $400 dollar pot and someone said "hey I have two pair".

I didnt buy it. I looked at his hand and I noticed he didn't have two pair.

The problem was that he had a straight. Luckily the dealer announced:

"Player one you win with your straight"

Unfortunatly for me I was player two.

The moral of the story is that to win a pot it doesn't matter what you say you have it only matters that your cards tell a story.

Luckily for me the very next hand I river the max flush for 126 dollars.

Wow, great story but wrong thread. I think.

IT'S BACK IT'S BACK

lol max flush

this

i generally dont talk poker with anyone unless there like minded and they know the game, and i mean actually know the game. it just gets frustrating when a friend is playing online (play chips) lol and ure crying fold!!! and hes like are you crazy? well no, u have top pair with a deuce kicker and the bored is a-10-k-j-7 with four hearts, they proceed to call, and say "how do u manage to fold top pair" haha douchebags

I told the pastor at my church whom I have known my whole life that I play poker for a living and she could not stop laughing. Then after I left I guess my mom told her that I was serious and next time I saw her she was very apologetic because she thought she had offended me. I told her I get this reaction from time to time.

Yeah, then start explaining the RoR model and your BR management rules until her eyes glaze over.

Alternatively you could explain how you've already withdrawn your initial deposit and now are only playing with your winnings (LOL, this argument is like the karate kid jump kick against innumerates -- no can defend).

this made me lol

Haha, my Mum's exactly the same.

Mum: So how did you get in on Poker?
Me: Errrm, up about $200 this week I think.
Mum: How much did you lose?
Me: LOL, this is my total net, profits minus losses.
Mum: How much did you start with?
Me: Nothing, I won a couple of freerolls and build it from there
Mum: What's a freeroll?
Me: It's a tournament that's free to enter and the top x% get paid
Mum: So they get you addicted and then hope you deposit more? How much?
Me: It was about $6 (she's kinda right I guess), but no, they want me to play at their site with that money so each pot I get involved in, they take a certain %, it's called rake, that's how they make their money.
Mum: So they do take it all back in the end?
Me: No, I beat the fish, which are the clueless players, so I give them a % cut for introducing me to them.
Mum: How much do they take?
Me: I'm not quite sure, but it's not a lot compared to how much I play with.
Mum: So you let them take your money but you don't know how much?
Me: Pretty much yeah.
Mum: Don't you think you should keep a record of it, you could be losing?
Me: Yeah probably, I think I'm down about $600 this week from them, but I got $200 and I enjoyed myself so it onyl cost $400 for a decent week of fun.
Mum: *FACE DROPS* Nooooo, $600? Really?
Me: LOL, no I'm joking. *End of conversation*

I've been on 12BI downswing and breakeven stretch for the last 30k hands, and when she asked me yesterday how much I've won, I just said I haven't played for a few days, imagine explaining to her varience, swings and the edge we've got in the long run .

I also hate it when she tells her friends I play, and they quiz me on it aswell. "I'm not being rude, but technically you're my Mum's friend, not mine, so I could tell you to fcuk off and stop questioning me and it wouldn't make a difference to our relationship." Believe me, I've been on the brink a couple times.

in my expereince when i tell pple i play poker they just laugh in a "omg what a loser" way of laughing

then when they find out how much i make their eyes light up and they are like "omg teach me"

i still havent told my parents and i am playing in the wsop this summer. what is my line?

Win and suprise em with some millions

the real beat imo.


no real offense intended just because of my experience pastor + she = does not compute.

For a while my gf knew I was playing poker but I kinda suppressed a lot of the details but when I started cashing out some reasonable sums and then had to explain the $1000 giftcard (from pokerstars fpp) i kind of let her in on exactly what poker was....

Part of doing this we started watching HSP and she saw how young durrr was and how he was pwning everyone. Now she wants to sit with me everytime I play....and the thing is if I make a buyin playing NL50 after 2 hours she is upset because she thinks I should have durrrr pwned at least 10k+:erm: Heaven forbid I should lose a big session with her watchin

the reason i don't tell ppl i play poker is because this douchey guy i told one time keeps asking me everytime i see him .....

"so, you up or down?"

My response, "ahh im bout even"

wtf does he care if im winning or losing and what does it matter to him whether im winning or losing that particular day?

Oh and the worst question was last night , he comes into my bar and says in the middle of the bar as im working... "so , you still gambling?" My response was, "im breathing aren't I?"

God i hate peoples

There are a few of my friends who are really good so when I go like to some girl ona night out: "Yeah, I play a little, pays for some stuff on the side"
Her: "Oh, so you know that X is ballin out of control"?
Me: Yeah.
Her: Can I have his number?

this thread is so great because it is so true. almost every story is familiar

This thread is great because there's a mixture of funny situations but also of social rejects who post embarassing responses to polite/friendly questions

laughing my balls off^^^^^^^

bank of america = worst bank EVER. i closed my account as soon as they started giving me trouble when i wanted to withdraw from FTP.

not to mention all that taking bailout money and giving accounts to illegal aliens with out requiring any identification

[QUOTE=I do get satisfaction telling people how much I lost sometimes for some weird reason. I find it funny when a few of my friends seem to be happier when I lose. I just lol.[/QUOTE]

This.

What instatilts me further is when a friend pushes for amounts lost. When I don't give him an answer and they start guessing I want to kick babies.

Assuming you are a winning player, NEVER get sucked into answering short-term questions.

I usually say something like, "I don't worry about how I do for a day, or even for a week. As long as I'm up at the end of the month, I'm happy."