this post tilts me more than anything in this thread

lmao stfu already loser

"Experts" analyzing hands played by fish...

It tilts me like crazy when I play limit hold'em.

OMFG yesssss the irony

lack of culture ITT!!!

hahaha

PEOPLE WHO WEAR FULLTILT/POKERSTARS APPAREIL

Is this guy for real? lol

Just a little preface. This is early in my first session of live 1/2 before I figure out that these people can't play a lick of poker.

I 4-bet bluff all-in with K9s and get snapped off by A9o. As the board if being dealt she stands up leans over the table and calls desperately for an Ace. Nothing in my life has ever tilted me more.

hahaha fkkk so good

Geting slowrolled soooo fkn hard twice in 1 day by the same sweaty asian doug lee look alike. He wears this old hat with a v-shaped brim and it says "born to run" on it.

**** i want to punch him in teh face every time i see him now
dsf
sdf
sfd
dfsdsf
dsf
sfd
agght

HEY LOOK EVERYONE HES SO COOL. AN ATTRACTIVE FEMALE IS DEMONSTRATING ATTRACTION TOWARDS HIM BUT HES INDIFFERENT! THATS SO BADASS.

Hand 1 Board: Ac Kc 2h Jd
Hand 2 Board: Ah 5h Kd Js

Donk: Can we get a wash? The same cards keep coming up.

ORLY?

they can't play poker and yet you are the one trying to bluff bad players?

don't bluff bad players isn't that poker lesson #1?

I loled!


I run it twice a couple of times on Preflop Allins, then eventually 2 fish get it in and dealer asks if they want to run it twice...

fish1: NO!. I play REAL poker. not Fake poker.(looks at me all proud pumping his chest)
fish2: yea i agree, lets play the real deal.

Hey look everyone, he has a CAPS LOCK button. I want one toooooo.

I was playing $1/2 limit at my local cardroom (yeah, cheeseburgers ship them nickels whatever)

Got dealt KK from the BB, 3 limpers - I raised pre and got audible groans. (oh come on friendly game kind of crap) All 3 have the "whatever" look on their faces and toss in another chip. I hit a set on the flop and bet - only one caller.

This guy is an old, like should be dead kinda old looking asian with a huge smirk on his face. I'm hoping he also caught a set. Turn is blank, I bet he calls. River is a third spade. I bet, he calls. He gets this smug ass look and announces to the whole table that he never looked at his hole cards. Middle-aged woman next to him (stereotype tourist looking fish to a t, fannypack) thinks it's a god damn riot. I table my set.

He then stands up like hes a friggin game show host and goes "Alright, let's see what we got here!" Starts to flip his cards over ONE AT A TIME (which puts me on insta-tilt anyway no matter what the situation). The first one is a spade, obviously. He looks at me and says "You think I got it?" Meanwhile the dealer isn't doing a damn thing about it. 2nd card is obv. a spade and he scoops the pot.

The woman I mentioned earlier is laughing her ass off, and decides to try the same "don't look at your cards" strategy for the next couple hands. The asian is explaining to her that he loves to play blind because "people are scared to bet into you, you could have anything!"

Old farts seem to like doing stuff like this. Maybe it's a culteral thing from poker 50 years ago?

I watched on open limp the button with 37s and then think for 2 minutes (literally) before folding to the BB's huge overbet all-in, which would have put the old guy all in too, early in an SNG.

Racist ban !

I was just saying he was an asian dude. I would've hated him no matter what race he was.

But you probably would have only specified his race if he was something other than white amirite?

Actually, yeah that's true. Damn. Maybe I am a racist.

What I find tilting is the guy who brings his gf with when he plays and she sits there and watches him forever. I was playing in a 2-10 spread cash game and this guy sits and plays for a solid 4 hours as his gf stands behind him the whole time.. She didn't even say one word or ever sit down, there were extra chairs sitting around but no one even offered her one lol. How could you just want to sit there like that I would at least want to walk around or something and how does he just expect her to watch him so long??

This.

But what's more tilting is the guy's gf sits next to him buying min while he buys in max. And she plays with her hole cards open. ALL IN at the speed of light, we know she has AA/AK. And the guy will always call/raise with junk to isolate the pot for her.

Eventually, everyone starts picking on / gunning for the guy because they are jealous of his little gf.

This one time this douche actually told an older person to "stop staring at his gf". That person was a reg everyone knew, he was in his 50's, had 3 children and 2 grand-children. Our douche officially became everyone's target and lost all his money.