i'd be way more tilted by u thinking ur DN. also, he tried to make nice, coz he obv saw u were sad or something. he comes off sympatethic imo. also he pulled off a tom dwan move on you so, props. hehe.

Posers

Two kinds of them really piss me off:

The ones who use theatrics, desperate to reinact some stupid scene from a poker movie they just watched. This might include ******ed things such as: Dressing up in stupid outfits (Like hoodies, glasses and headphones when they clearly aren't belonging to the same generation, staring you down, talking nonsense, mimicing mannerisms of some pro or actor they saw in a movie. It really fricking pisses me off to see some fat nosed, goofy idiot trying his hardest to mimic Durrrr's cold gaze.

Then there's the delusional people who sit down, flop the nuts and run before their delusional fantasy of being a poker pro is shattered within the next few hands. I can't stand that probably most of all. Knowing this dummy is fleeing the table, living out some delusional fantasy in his head instead of just playing the game and giving me his money.



Another one is the idiots who don't realize how bad they are patronizing me. You know what I mean, the 45 year old who probably only plays on the week ends with his wife and friends. comes to your regular place and sits down, goes on a fluke streak and starts being all smug after flopping full houses all night and treats you like "Yeah, I do this professionally, I'm so flippin' good." Im getting pissed just picturing it

Something is wrong with you dude.. you try to explain the personae of people that they try to copy very well, I'm thinking your one of these people.

when people tell stories like"oh yeah i dont play online poker that much, but i won big once, about 20 thousand.. i i I cant remember the buyin i think it was 100 or some odd dollars. " (even funnier when they say"oh there was like 10k players too which makes it impossible to only pay 20k too) LOL

Also funny when people claim to have won the sunday million but say"yeah i won it, i won 50k" NOT EVEN POSSIBLE!!!!

Empathy


Is not familiarity


I don't think that having an understanding of what another human being is thinking should automatically mean that my mind works in a similar way. That assumption is founded on nothing

Everyone just wants to impress you Mark.

"...there is an idea of a Patrick Bateman, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me, only an entity, something illusory, and though I can hide my cold gaze and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable: I simply am not there."

Yeah this plus...
STFU YOU LIMP/CALLED 73ss CHECK/RAISED TURN WITH 3RD PAIR AND HIT A TWO-OUTER ON THE RIVER WHERE CAN I GET AN AUTOGRAPHED COPY OF YOUR BOOK...
You were cracking the aquarium glass, just let it go man

Heh, well sorry, my phone doesn't have spell check. "Colander" was the word I was looking for, thanks. Im glad you all had so much fun with it though!

This one started happening recently in my local donkaments - People shove all in, get called, wait for the caller to table their hand, study it for 5-10 seconds and then finally table theirs.

saw a guy other day put gum on the table(after it was in his mouth then back in his mouth) in between hands like it was standard.

From today....

'do you know what the best hand to call any raise with statistically? 710 of spades...thats why its called the daniel negreanu hand'

'This guy sat down at our table and first hand, it went limp, limp and he limped... I knew he had Aces so I raised to play him heads up'

'Did you know an Ace appears on the flop more than any other card? its been proven by math'

'I had £9 at one point...now I have £90... I'm no bingo player..Im a professional poker player... (as he tables J6 off in a raised pre flop pot to show a full house)'

also been said but f***ing hollywood **** **** who TANK over every decision and fold, and sometimes you see their hand as they fold and they have nothing.... there is no TV....are you really that starved for attention?

Wow thats horrible and hysterical at the same time lol!!

yesterday;wait an hour for seat, 2 seconds later kid sits down hoodie hat doucheglasses
3 hands in with him im IP, ~$40 pot on turn, he bets i shove, kid calls with flopped FD. rivers flush vs my set.
whatever. no biggie.

HE THEN TELLS ME HOW HE HAD ENOUGH EQUITY TO CALL AND GETS INTO SO MUCH ****ING DETAIL ON THE HAND TO JUSTIFY HIS CALL LIKE ****:LAKHiofehfl;dalkbh;sa

I'm running really bad the other day against a total fish, raising up literally every single hand calling down with bottom pair etc. Cracked my kk all in on flop with a gutshot. You get the picture. So I flop top pair and a reraise him all in on a flop b/c I'm usually way ahead here. He sits there, starts laughing. Showing people beside him hey look what I have. Meanwhile I'm sitting there like an idiot for 2 minutes and he finally calls me with his set. ****ing tilting.

This guy on a 1/2 table that was all in pre JJ vs my AA and hits his Jack on the river and litteraly takes off his shirt and start running around the tables screaming like a ****ing moron.

No need to mention I was arrested a couple minutes later, blood all over my shirt and this guy laying on the ground uncouscious. 1 night in jail, totally worth it.

pics of jail bait?

First paragraph happened

Second paragraph didnt?

when idiots ask you for change.....

There is a reason I only have £5 / £1 in front of me... to have towers of chips.....as Phil Laak does... voluming up... makes me feel good.... why must you ruin this for me?

MORONS

Playing in a tourney it's still early I get AKcc on the BB facing a raise from the girl in the BTN. I put in a healthy reraise and she flats. Flop comes AXX, a MONSTER. So I check to her and after some pondering, she puts it all in. I snap and she opens the two red Queens. Turn bricks and the river as you know, the one outter. She jumps up like a pop-tart from her seat, starts clapping and dancing like a baboon. I exit the cardroom as fast as I could before I do something that would wind up getting me a criminal record.

fyp.

I wish it didin't, I lost control of myself and made it to the local newspaper

Ban for horrible level plz...

Suck out on me in a big ass pot, then an hour later he's totally forgotten about it and is bitching about how bad he is running.

ya ban for worst level ever: http://ki-media.blogspot.ca/2010/11/...r-against.html is your name Suong Sophorn, famous revolutionary?