People that make horrendous calls and apologize after sucking out.
C'unts that call your 7BB shove as though if that's what you wanted when in fact you're in blind-stealing mode on the bubble. "All in", everyone folds, the bitch: "okay I will call you". She has a monster that has you absolutely crushed (AX vs AX). And if she has KK+ she will say "awwww sowyyyyyy" before she says call. DIEEEEEEEE.
Let's now include stuff that you LOVE seeing in live cash games (besides winning of course):
Nits losing 5 hours of "hard grind" to a maniac that's only here to dump money.
Like this hand:
Limped pot, nit is in the blinds.
Flop:
AK6
Nit checks, maniac who has just won $27K at blackjack bets, nit check-raises big and maniac calls.
Turn:
5
Nit bets and starts acting vulnerable "I swear to God I have a made hand and I know you're on a flush draw". Maniac raises. Nit is now begging for mercy, offering to check-down, trying to convince the Villain that he is "strong". Villain does not budge, tells nit that he is here to play POKER. Nit calls.
River is a blank and nit checks saying "I won't fold to any bet!". Of course our Hero shoves and nit goes into the tank, he finally calls with
A6 for Aces up and the maniac slowrolls him
55 one at a time.
So satisfying! The next hand the maniac calls off a pot sized bet on a gutshot (and hit). Me thinks this is the day I will walk out of here with a 5+ BI's profit without a sweat. Until the idiot nit tells the aggro-donk "hey why don't you go play at the 5/10? There is a seat open you know".
Not only did that chase away the maniac, it made us short-handed and the table broke. I tell him "what the **** was that? he's spewing his money and you chase him away?". And he responds "Did you see how he was hitting? I don't want to play with lucky players like that!".