Surefire signs that internet poker is taking over your life - Page 4

Can't look a stock market graph without seeing good runs and episodes of tilt.

Advised my brother to fold preflop when he mentioned getting remarried.

My SMS alert is the sound of Full Tilt's card shuffle.

lol upload that some where plesae!

Quote

01-06-2010 , 08:14 PM

#78

animefan48

grinder

Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 404

Quote:

Originally Posted by timeforheroes

When you show three disinterested girls at a party your sharkscope graph whilst explaining that its still good despite the downswing at the end, because "you can lose 30 or so of these things in a row and its not your fault, the variance is crazy".

When had you been one of the girls you would have been extremely interested and had this been a flirtation attempt it would have immediately generated further interest.
When you get a job after months of searching, you hate it because it means you'll be missing at least 4 midnight tournaments a week as well as PAD.
When your celebrity crushes are Ali Nejad and Jen Harman.
Use a variations of the words donkey,tilt,****ments constantly and w/o explanation.

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01-06-2010 , 08:16 PM

#79

CBorders

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 16,505

Saying "rigged", "one time" and "standard" irl

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01-06-2010 , 08:16 PM

#80

CBorders

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 16,505

Quote:

Originally Posted by lnternet

When my brother asked me why Im lying so much I told him that in contrast to most people I got a balanced talking range.

You are the second worst poster on this entire forum but this was excellent.

Quote

01-06-2010 , 09:25 PM

#81

Data Architect

banned

Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 53

Quote:

Originally Posted by solsek

lol upload that some where plesae!

Done.

http://www.undernetwork.com/FTshuffle.zip

Quote

01-06-2010 , 09:33 PM

#82

seoulken

journeyman

Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 217

Quote:

Originally Posted by grimripper21

once was having sex with current GF and a bad beat rolled through my head. i was like wtf. how could he call all that off with ATo.

I've done similar.

Also: when you're washing dishes in your flat and hear the "ding!" telling you that it's your turn, so you race back to the monitor to find that you're not playing.

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01-06-2010 , 09:51 PM

#83

GigaFish

old hand

Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 1,234

When you cut a hole in your gaming chair and stick a bucket under it so absolutely NO call of nature will keep you away from the 1c buy-in hyper-turbo NLHE MTTs on Stars.

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01-06-2010 , 10:02 PM

#84

Giev money??

old hand

Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 1,456

epicness ITT

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01-06-2010 , 10:19 PM

#85

Brussels Sprout

old hand

Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,789

When you start thinking thoughts like "If I get in a car crash and become a parapalegic, hey at least I can still grind with my nose"

Quote

01-06-2010 , 10:29 PM

#86

GigaFish

old hand

Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 1,234

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brussels Sprout

When you start thinking thoughts like "If I get in a car crash and become a parapalegic, hey at least I can still grind with my nose"

Genius.

Quote

01-06-2010 , 10:35 PM

#87

LetMeLive

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 25,131

when i go to place a dish in the sink and my grandmother says "ship it"

Last edited by LetMeLive; 01-06-2010 at 10:35 PM. Reason: im ashamed to admit that, heh

Quote

01-06-2010 , 10:40 PM

#88

KenDoG_819

old hand

Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 1,274

When at grocery store checking out and cashier tells me total is $47.16 and i announce "raise" as i hand her a $100 bill.

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01-06-2010 , 10:46 PM

#89

trob888

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 5,403

Last mothers day my family went to my aunts new house and she was talking to me about how excited she was that her new neighborhood has a pool so her 3 kids could just hang out there all day. My exact response to her was "Yea having a pool in the neighborhood is definitely plus ev." I realized my mistake immmediately and told her its just slang for somethin good.

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01-06-2010 , 10:52 PM

#90

cake_au

newbie

Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 47

Quote:

Originally Posted by KenDoG_819

When at grocery store checking out and cashier tells me total is $47.16 and i announce "raise" as i hand her a $100 bill.

terrible raise size, played horribly.

Quote

01-06-2010 , 11:17 PM

#91

Jolt

adept

Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 716

Quote:

Originally Posted by cake_au

terrible raise size, played horribly.

If she folds, you get free groceries.

Quote

01-06-2010 , 11:27 PM

#92

David123

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 8,818

Quote:

Originally Posted by seoulken

I've done similar.

Also: when you're washing dishes in your flat and hear the "ding!" telling you that it's your turn, so you race back to the monitor to find that you're not playing.

haha, pavlovs dogs FTL . thats a bit sick if true. also hilarious.

Quote

01-06-2010 , 11:29 PM

#93

Kashatrian

enthusiast

Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 83

When you use the term "donkey" so often that the undergraduates at the college you are attending for grad school nick name you "The Donk"

Quote

01-06-2010 , 11:32 PM

#94

StrikeR300

veteran

Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 2,158

Quote:

Originally Posted by freakBYnature

No, the contract itself is the blind. The deal offered from Vendor is a bet, the renegotiation is a clear 3bet... lol

I thought villain brought in the contract, & hero raised.

---
When you rub your paycheck on your tities?

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01-06-2010 , 11:37 PM

#95

Dan87

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 10,079

When I get a good grade on one paper and a bad one on another I chalk it up to variance.

Quote

01-07-2010 , 12:00 AM

#96

qpac09

adept

Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 1,040

When you buy something you say "It's just 2 buyins."

Quote

01-07-2010 , 12:25 AM

#97

nienie23

journeyman

Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 248

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jubes

This is from that +ev comic. make up your own.

No idea what +ev comic is. I wrote this cause it happened to me once.

Quote

01-07-2010 , 12:37 AM

#98

SoUnreal

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,560

When you're watching a good movie in the theater, but it gets boring for like 2 minutes and your mind automatically shifts to poker for a solid 5+ minute day dream.

Quote

01-07-2010 , 12:37 AM

#99

RyanStk

centurion

Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 141

When a guy starts talking **** to your face and you just say "you're not worth it dude" and walk away thinking "Breaking his jaw is def -EV"

Quote

01-07-2010 , 12:52 AM

#100

hotjenny314

actually Katie Dozier

Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,676

When you talk about grinding in a new chair in your facebook status and don't even realize that your non-poker friends think you are talking about sex

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