nope

My contribution:

>Dear Poker Stars,
>
>I herewithupon submit my new tilt-inducing avatar for your approval.
>
>As you probably don't know because you live on some island by England, the
>Jonas Brothers are a very popular pop group that has mastered the art of
>creating poorly written music to win over the hearts of 13 year old girls
>everywhere, particularly ones that are "big boned".
>
>In addition to approving my avatar, I ask that you rate it on a scale of
>1-10 in terms of tilt-inducingness (10 being someone will break their
>laptop).
>
>I look forward to working with you in this manner.
>
>Sincerely yours,

xxxxxxxx



Hello xxxx,

Thank you for your email.

Even in small islands, the Jonas Brothers have managed to reach and touch
the heart of little 13-18 year old girls (and some boys) with their poorly
written music.

Personally I would rate your image with an 8 regarding tilt-inducing as I,
personally, found Kevin Jonas more tilt-inducing.

Even though your image will be perfectly approved, we cannot upload the
image for you but you can perfectly do it on your own. To change it, start
the PokerStars software, and from the Lobby screen, select:

'Account' -> 'Select/Change Image'

Please let us know if we can assist you further, and thank you for playing
at PokerStars.

Regards,

Gustavo Q
PokerStars Support Team

^^^ thats really is a tilt inducing avatar. i googled ugliest woman ever for mine, but i think yours is better

this thread always cheers me up =)

Guys.. I think I just leveled myself. I didn't get the point. 1-0 to PS support!

Hello *****

Thank you for the email. We greatly appreciate your epic compliment.

So I am hanging out with a couple friends the other night, one of which just
bought a new dog. We are chatting about this and that, and I ask my friend,
"Have you named your puppy?" My friend replies, "Yeah, his name is
Bentley." "Bentley, huh? That is a weird name for dog," I said. After a
couple seconds of silence with a befuddled look on my face, my friend
finally says in all seriousness, "Pound for pound, this dog and a Bentley
are worth about the same. I want my girlfriend to always remember that."

I hope you have de-tilted since you wrote your email. Always keep a
straight head at the table, my epic friend.

If you ever need anything, please just ask. Best of luck at the tables!

Regards,

NickH
PokerStars Support Team


----- Original Message -----
From: ****************
Sent: 2009/11/19 05:26:17
To: support@pokerstars.com
Subject: I am epic. Are you, the PS support staff shift working right now,
epic?

Hello.

Your support is epic. I love it. I want moar!

Please, as a gesture of epicness, help me remove my tilt by telling me
something funny.

If it aint funny, I would like for you to tell me a great support story.

I wish you all a great ****!

Have a nice day
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hello ********,

Thank you for taking the time to bring this to our attention and for
contacting us back in regards to the misspell.

Hope you have a great week and please do not hesitate to contact us any time.

Regards,

Maureen
PokerStars Support Team

----- Original Message -----
From: ***************
Sent: 2009/11/19 05:28:23
To: support@pokerstars.com
Subject: Fwd: I am epic. Are you, the PS support staff shift working right
now, epic?

Omg, I mispelled a word wrong.. I mean shift. SHIFT as in your work hours.

I had no intentions of being rude. I apologize !!

Regards,

****

From: ksloan@learnlink.emory.edu
spamspamspam

PokerStars Support - Package Received‏
From: PokerStars Support (support@pokerstars.com)
Sent: 20 November 2009 17:35:24
To: ***************

Hello ****,

It's good to hear you are doing well at the live games.

We received the precious cargo without incident. Your cat is doing great,
and he is getting along well with all of the Support team. Everyone loves
him, so it might be a little while before he comes home. Don't worry,
though. He assures me you are, now and forever, first in his heart.

If you ever need help or just have some questions about getting back online,
PokerStars Support is here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Best of luck at
the tables!

Regards,

NickH
PokerStars Support Team


----- Original Message -----
From: *********@hotmail.co.uk
Sent: 2009/11/19 23:33:20
To: support@pokerstars.com
Subject: Hey Stars
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Hey stars
>
>I havn't been on your site lately as I've been doing really well live and
trying to concentrate on that aspect of my game.
>
>Though
>I am enjoying the social aspect of live play and rekindling my love for
>restrooms as 'water bottles' are frowned upon at my local casino, I do
>miss you and your bleepy noises and I hope you realise this.
>
>Anyway
>to get to the point of this email when i got home tonight I talked for
>a while with my cat about my nights play, although he said he was
>pleased I was having better success with my game he also misses you and
>wondered if he could spend some time with you. I didn't want to let him
>down so I explained I would have to ask you first but he was having
>none of it. He persuaded me to send him to you, if there is any problem
>or he says he's getting homesick feel free to send him back whenever
>you want.
>
> I hope he reaches you safely
>
> Regards and Best wishes
>
> **********
>
>
>New! Receive and respond to mail from other email accounts from within
Hotmail Find out how.
>_________________________________________________ ________________
>Use Hotmail to send and receive mail from your different email accounts
>http://clk.atdmt.com/UKM/go/186394592/direct/01/

purrrrrrrrrrrrr

where is the pic stars support did about the office???

haha havent seen that pic before

Holy mother of lol that pic is awesome! No words, truly amazing support staff. Feel kind of bad for playing on FT.

ty ty

Sent: 2009/11/24 07:25:30
To: support@pokerstars.com
Subject: Question for the STars team

>
>Hi,
>
>I have just recently watched some classic Pixar films. I'm always hearing
about how good they are for both adults and children and have been meaning
to watch them for some time now. My personal favourite was Monsters Inc.
Isn't Sully cute!?
>
>Anyway, the reason for my email is because when I was enjoying the witty,
action packed adventure that is Toy Story, I couldn't help wondering why
Buzz Lightyear doesn't speak when humans are around. I completely understand
why the other toys don't speak, but Buzz Lightyear doesn't think he's a toy.
Can you shed any light on this issue?
>
>Thank you


Hello XX,

Thank you for contacting PokerStars.

In order for us to better assist you, please provide us with additional
information regarding any issues or questions you have. If you are
encountering problems using the PokerStars software, please give us as much
detail as possible, as well as any error codes or messages being displayed
on your computer screen.

We look forward to assisting you on your reply.

Regards,

Balint
PokerStars Support Team


I expected something funny, if not at least the real answer. Have they got bored with us?

PokerStars Support - Freerolls and Puddy
Wednesday, November 17, 2010 10:51 PM
From:
"PokerStars Support" <support@pokerstars.com>
Add sender to Contacts
To:*******

Hello Stephanie,

Thank you for your email.

I can see that you play a lot of Astronomer freerolls and that you may be
referring to these freerolls. After checking the 5-card draw Freeroll and
2-7 Freeroll in comparison to the Hold'em Freeroll I can conclude that
amount of winners ticket are calculated based on how many players are
participating, that is the maximum amount of players allowed.

Here are some of the entry tickets awarded relative towards amount of players:

5-card draw: 48 entries/max 6000 players
2-7: 56 entries/max 7000 players
Hold'em: 72 entries/max 9000 players

As for poor Puddy (I assume Puddy is a cat, if not please forgive my
presumptions?). Have you tried to take Puddy to a veterinarian to provide a
medical examination to why he is throwing up his food? Another reason could
be that animals are more complex than you think and they also need varieties
of food and entertainment. So may be try to give Puddy some new type of food
and buy new toys?

I hope this email has helped you with your question. Please let us know if
there is anything else we can help you with?

Regards,

Susan W
PokerStars Support Team


----- Original Message -----
From: *****
Sent: 2010/11/17 21:50:55
To: support@pokerstars.com
Subject: Freerolls

>To Whom It May Concern,
>I was wondering if you could please tell me why 2-7 and 5cd freerolls give
fewer spots than their NL/Fixed Hold'em counterparts. I'm very upset that I
have to spend 4-6 hours just to get to 56 rather than trying to shoot for
72. Why not just take the top 100 from every single freeroll tourney to make
it equal for everyone. I understand it looks to be more challenging playing
the draw tourneys, but i feel like I'm working tons harder just because
there are fewer spots.
>
>Also because your support team is known for it's knowledge and excellence,
can you please tell me why my puddy hasn't eaten his food for two weeks.
When I gave him some tuna, even that came up. Any advice is greatly appreciated.
>
>Yours,
>Stephanie

----- Original Message -----

Sent: 2010/11/20 11:25:20
To: support@pokerstars.com
Subject: existential angst

>
>
>Message:
>
>Dear Support,
>
>I was playing in one of your tournaments facing a tough decision for all
my chips, when I had this really strong deja vu feeling. For some reason
it felt like another me in a different universe had been in this exact same
situation. This got me thinking that it must have been in the past which
led to the idea that it must have been in a universe before the big bang.
Perhaps I have played this tournament an infinite number of times in the
past and also unfortunately bubbled an infinite number of times which is
quite a sad concept I think.
>
>Anyway all this infinite me stuff started freaking my brain and then I saw
your friendly 'help' button and thought perhaps support can ease my
troubles. What do you think was there before the big bang, and does it
also melt your brain just thinking about it? If you find yourself getting
into a similar freaked out state as me, then i am terribly sorry and
perhaps you could suggest something to do to take my mind (and yours) off
such brain frying thoughts.
>
>Regards
>
---------------------------------------
>subject: Quantum physics and poker tournaments

>Hello

Thank you for your email.

It sounds to me like an extremely exaggerated feeling of "deja vu"
(http://science.howstuffworks.com/sci.../extrasensory-
perceptions/question657.htm). This is a normal phenomena, except for
the "different universe" before the big bang.

First of all, both secular and religious scholars would likely find this to
be unlikely, as "The" universe would not have been in existence before
a "creation event".

Perhaps you really felt like you experienced this at another time in
another galaxy, but this would have certainly been subsequent to whatever
celestial creation event you might support.

In any case, to answer your enquiry, I actually don't find myself being
freaked out by thoughts like this, but I will be sure to ponder the space-
time continuum next time I am about to commit all of my chips.

In my experience, the only thing that is sure to help distract you
from "Brain frying thoughts" is to view photos and videos of attractive
members of whatever gender you find most stimulating. If you are still
considering your place in the universe after that, then I can only
recommend that you contact a mental health professional.

Good luck to you, and thank you for choosing PokerStars.

Regards,

Randy
PokerStars Support Team
>

Hello Pokerstars support!

I have an important question, and because I know PS support is all-knowing I turn turn to you for an answer.
The problem is that it's my wife's birthday tomorrow and I can't think of anything to give her as a present.

She also plays poker. She told me she wants nothing but me for birthday, but people tell me that is usually a blatant lie.

Please help me,
Kribu


----------------------

Hello Hero,

Thank you for trusting PokerStars in such an important matter.

As you know we are not really a dating advice site, however some players have indeed found their other halfs from our tables.

But I will do my best and unfortunately I must agree. As a lady myself, if I say that I don't want anything then I mean the opposite. So in this case I would not dare to trust her and a nice bouquet of flowers is a must.

The rest is just up to you. Perhaps a nice dinner, poker game and what ever this might lead to

Our team wishes you best of luck tomorrow and of course at our tables!

Regards,

Mrs.Someone
PokerStars Support Team

ps4life. This thread was the nail in the coffin, and yes my loyalty is that cheap.

sigh...I miss Stars, and their support

haha, pokerstars support is sick

k I just asked them if Canucks would win the stanley cup

fortune teller support person inc.

Hello Ryan,

Thank you for your email and sharing your thoughts.

I am glad to hear that you have been thinking about this Sunday's double guarantees. As for the actual question-part of your email, I have put up for a vote in the office. I must say that I got a couple of mixed reactions and we initially were unable to come to a unanimous answer. Several people said 'what is the Stanley Cup', others said 'I hope the Chicago Blackhawks win it again and parade it around at the Gay Pride Parade like last year', but as soon as they realized that it was between Vancouver and Boston and that the Canucks are leading the series 1-0, it was quickly agreed upon that the odds are in your favor.

However, just as in a poker game, anything can happen at any time. So I have to conclude that the jury is not out on the verdict yet. I can confirm that we all wish you well in the Stanley Cup though!

If you have any other questions, please do not hesitate to email us.

We thank you for choosing PokerStars and wish you the best of luck at our tables!

Regards,

Mick
PokerStars Support Team


----- Original Message -----
From: #######@gmail.com
Sent: 2011/06/04 04:45:51
To: support@pokerstars.com
Subject: Question

User ID: ####### This message was sent from the Contact Support form. Authenticated sender is "#######@gmail.com"

Category: Poker Sub-Category:
Client Version: '4.696' System (OS) Info: 'Windows7[6.1]'

Message:

So I was thinking about this Sunday's double guarantees, and I wanted to know if you guys thought the Canucks would win the Stanley Cup.

Thank you,
#######

When I sent the question I was like


But then I was like

Awesome thread and awesome Stars Support!!

pretty sick...lol

Pokerstars support delivers.