Two Plus Two Publishing LLC
Two Plus Two Publishing LLC
 

Go Back   Two Plus Two Poker Forums > >

Notices

Poker Beats, Brags, and Variance Here's where you put your whines and wins.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-01-2009, 12:28 AM   #51
harddeterminism
old hand
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 1,457
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

i said POT POT!!!....I thought we were chopping!
harddeterminism is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2009, 12:44 AM   #52
brycead
old hand
 
brycead's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: winning 20bb pots
Posts: 1,740
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

hahah good bump. if only bbv was like this nowadays
brycead is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2009, 12:46 AM   #53
MYMESSIAH
adept
 
MYMESSIAH's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: The Seven Seas of Ryhe
Posts: 1,154
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

I saw this the first time and it is just as funny
MYMESSIAH is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2009, 01:15 AM   #54
hazillow
journeyman
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 329
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Can't

breathe
hazillow is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2009, 01:25 AM   #55
fishmeout
veteran
 
fishmeout's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: chi city
Posts: 3,221
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

I've laughed at this all 3 times I've read it.
fishmeout is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-2009, 01:54 AM   #56
behhh04
veteran
 
behhh04's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Sydney, Australia
Posts: 3,452
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

seriously one the best things i've read on 2p2. So funny.
behhh04 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2011, 06:56 AM   #57
reggieftw
journeyman
 
reggieftw's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Not today
Posts: 323
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Joey Croissant: "Jesus [censored] Christ, how much money did you have?"

Michel: "After I bet I would quietly slide my chips back toward my stack, nobody noticed.

best part
reggieftw is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2011, 08:54 AM   #58
jimmyvjv13
Life Grinder
 
jimmyvjv13's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Repping Aces @ZepHendrix
Posts: 4,979
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Agree that this never gets old. I read it in the archives every 6 months or so. It kills me every time.
jimmyvjv13 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2011, 01:28 PM   #59
BrunoSA
centurion
 
BrunoSA's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Craddle of Samba
Posts: 188
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

very nice OP
BrunoSA is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2011, 05:38 PM   #60
nanana
centurion
 
nanana's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Right on top
Posts: 166
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

gotta start playing plo :P
nanana is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2011, 05:47 PM   #61
GDF
old hand
 
GDF's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: TITLETOWN
Posts: 1,571
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

pot
GDF is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2011, 07:02 PM   #62
3pnym
banned
 
3pnym's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: WOW Is this real life ?
Posts: 1,284
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Pot
3pnym is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2011, 07:05 PM   #63
HeyN8itsDan
enthusiast
 
HeyN8itsDan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 99
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

how do you pronounce "boorish"

boo-rish?

bore-ish?

bru-ish?
HeyN8itsDan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2011, 07:52 PM   #64
YouWishFish
veteran
 
YouWishFish's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 2,466
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Quote:
Originally Posted by HeyN8itsDan View Post
how do you pronounce "boorish"

boo-rish?

bore-ish?

bru-ish?
2nd one
YouWishFish is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-2011, 08:37 AM   #65
The Way
grinder
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Passiving up in florida
Posts: 496
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Quote:
Originally Posted by brycead View Post
hahah good bump. if only bbv was like this nowadays
especially this nowadays

Come on bbv we need more gold like this

POT
The Way is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-2011, 08:56 AM   #66
Channidae
enthusiast
 
Channidae's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: London
Posts: 82
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Can someone write a Scunthorpe Rounders? Or something equally as random? That would be funny also IMO.
Channidae is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-2011, 09:17 AM   #67
KVNSTV
newbie
 
KVNSTV's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 23
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Quote:
Originally Posted by Channidae View Post
Can someone write a Scunthorpe Rounders? Or something equally as random? That would be funny also IMO.
I tired to write an online rounders script, but always felt like trying to replicate the mona lisa with MSPAINT after Eurorounders.


Online Rounderís Script Part 1

[Man Narrating(Micky)] Listen, here's the thing.
If you can't spot the fish in your first half hour on the site,
then your not running tracking software, so you are the fish

Guys on forums will tell ya... they play for a living.
When there really playing micro stakes,
Itís like any other job, not that Iíve had one, Iím fourteen,
You donít gamble, you chip dump and buy accounts,
Your goal is to win one big tournament a week, that's it.
Get your money in with any old ****, and pray that you hit
Don't fold anything. Ever.

[Logging onto a poker site]

This is Russ Hamiltonís place UltimateDebt,
You wonít find it in the Yellow pages,
Because itís in Nicaragua,
Or some other 3rd world **** hole with no extradition treaty
But if you're looking for high stakes,
this is the only site on the web where you can still deposit from the US
Using your Dadís master card with no ID verification

[Pointing at screen]

His avatar doesn't look like much, a chimpanzee smoking a cigar
but KGB77698_Balla has five million posts on 2 + 2.
He's the one guy in the online game you don't want to **** with.

Msn chat box pops up

Knish_247 is an online legend.
He's been an online rounder, earning his living at cards...
since he was 18 years old, thatís nearly 2 years which makes him a veteran in the online game

[Typing on MSN]

(Knish_247) What are you doin, sitting 25/50?
(Rounder22789) Um, I'm reserving a seat for a Headz up 4 rollz game.
(Knish_247)- LOL Donkuargumanets. - [sends chuckle, emoticon]
'Cause I hope you're not thinking of putting more then 5% of your roll in play?
[Narrating] He's as close to a friend as there is on 2+2.
[Narrator] But tonight, I don't want to deal with him.

(Rounder22789) - I can beat the game. Ė
(Knish_247) Maybe. Maybe this is a game can be beat. But you know you can beat the Sit and Goís on Ipoker
(Rounder22789) yeah but the software makes be vomit, and I want to shove all in everytime the little French guy with the beret makes a raise.
(Knish_247) Okay. I understand, back to battle.

[Starting to play online]

[Micky Narrating] The game in question is Unlimited Texas Holding Them.
And a game like this doesn't come together often outside of Full Tilt
The stakes attract live proís,
and they in turn attract the online sharks.
Unlimited Texas Holding Them. Is the GW Bush of poker, its very simple.
Each player is dealt two cards face down.
Five cards are then dealt face up across the middle.
These are community cards everyone can use to make the best five card hand.
The key to the game is playing the man, not the cards. Or being very lucky,
There's no other game in which fortunes can change so much from hand to hand.
A brilliant player can get a strong hand cracked, go on tilt...
and lose his mind along with every single chip in front of him.
This is why the World Series of Poker is decided over an Unlimited Texas Holding Them table.
Some people, pros even, won't play No-Limit.
They can't handle the swings.
But there are others, like Doyle Brunson,
who consider No-Limit the only pure game left.
Like Papa Smurf said..."Iím all-in Gargamel, And you can suck my blue balls."

[Micky Narrating] Here's the beauty of this game.

[Text appers in the chat box]

(KGB77698_Balla) Go ahead, Dick. Make your standard C-Bet.

[Micky Narrating] I just got top two pair on the flop,
and I want to keep him in the hand.
Against your average guy, I'd set a bear trap, hardly bet at all.
Let him walk into it. But KGB77698_Balla is too smart for that.
So, what I've got to do is over-bet the pot,
make it look like I'm trying to buy it.

[Micky Typing in the chat box]

(Rounder22789) I bet 192.63

[Micky Narrating] Then he plays back at me, and I get paid off.

(KGB77698_Balla) I call because I need the money to pay your mumma to suk my dick.

[Micky Narrating] My guess is KGB77698_Balla on a flush draw.

The sites software sayís in a robotic voice; Burn and turn.

[Micky Narrating] There's my money card, nine of hearts.
I got a full house.

Both Check

[Micky Narrating] Now I hope a spade falls and KGB77698_Balla makes his flush.
That way he'll bet strong, and I'll beat him with my nines full over aces.

(KGB77698_Balla) I'm going to bet... Bet... 674.67

Clicks on the Time button.

[Micky Narrating] I want him to think that I'm pondering a call,
but all I'm really thinking about is posting this hand on the interweb.

(Rounder22789) I'm gonna go all in, 'cause I think youíre a pussaaaaa.

KGB77698_Balla waits then requests time and then types in

(KGB77698_Balla) You been pwíned beyatch!

[Micky Narrating] I know before the cards are even turned over.
Man, I lost all my money, my whole roll.
KVNSTV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-2011, 02:14 PM   #68
interix
banned
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 560
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

pot
interix is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-2011, 02:25 PM   #69
absolutefish
BBV champion
 
absolutefish's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: I harv a veek hand.
Posts: 7,829
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

I laughed for 72 minutes.

5*
absolutefish is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-2011, 08:28 PM   #70
CantonaLeRoi
journeyman
 
CantonaLeRoi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: /Vegas
Posts: 249
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

re-pot!
CantonaLeRoi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-2011, 11:22 PM   #71
Land Of The Free?
old hand
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 1,695
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Michel: "Rags."

Joey Croissant: "That's probably fine too, you're only like a 48/52 dog."



Genius.
Land Of The Free? is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2011, 12:05 PM   #72
Delgado
grinder
 
Delgado's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Helsinki
Posts: 420
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

there's a total of 98 minutes of laughing in the first story.
Spoiler:
Delgado is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2011, 12:11 PM   #73
scrimitzu
grinder
 
scrimitzu's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Value Town
Posts: 455
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

I laughed for forty-three minutes
scrimitzu is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-2011, 12:17 PM   #74
PaulScholes
newbie
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 19
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

Nice
PaulScholes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2011, 05:19 AM   #75
TiltAttack
grinder
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: krung thep
Posts: 613
Re: EuroRounder: from he archives needs to be seen again

pot
TiltAttack is offline   Reply With Quote

Reply
      

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:07 AM.


Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © 2008-2020, Two Plus Two Interactive