brag: fat girlfriend made me chicken nuggets while i was grinding
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 668
I was grinding these soul destroying 90 mans on FT and she said she was going to cook us dinner because she was feeling geneorous. what kinda **** is that. she puts chip on my lap and i let his little hand do all the clicking especially all-in shoves and I talk a little bit of strategy with him mainly the value of position and slow playing big pairs at the end of mtts
she made me 8 nuggets. and she had 27 nuggets. she was burning her fingers on the hot fat while they were still cooking trying to get one to grub on. i am so sick of how selfish she is. we went to an all you can eat buffet once and she ate so much she was farting all the way home in the car and I think she almost sharted. she also laughs at me because she can out eat me at any meal time. I tried to beat her once and ate 23 pootatos but I almost threw up
i am sitting there trying to rambo a cash game with 16 dollars PLO and final table a 90 man on a stake because we need $ and she just complains that we are broke every day and she wishes she had met a better man. I was like why dont you go spread your thunder thighs for tod brunson i bet he hasnt had any in awhile. she doesnt even know who tod is. she googled him and said hubba hubba. im like whatever bitch you would crush eachother.
she sends me on negreanutilt everyday. she said she eats so much food because she needs to keep her strength up to look after little chip because she is basically a single mom now because I am married to poker for life and basially a loser i said no bitch you need to stop eating food from a wheelbarrow but yes poker is more interesting than you.. your voice chills me to the bone and you are as boring as beans. go make your nightly phonecall to skank#1 and gossip about everyones affairs. I said she wouldnt last 2 minutes in the poker world.I bet phil hellmuth doesnt get this kinda **** when he gets home from the big game... I bet he gets pancakes a bathrobe and a hand-jive.
my EV always goes down when she starts nagging me which is constant pressure...even when she is being nice or trys to do something special for us i have to fake delight.she once made a recording of herself moaning for my birthday.. it was horrible. imagine an ogre scratching his bumhole and you will come close to understanding how it made me feel. she expected sex that night but i had to fake an injury. she wore some stockings that made her legs look like submarines .
one day when chip is older and he knows how to play poker..maybe when he is 6 or 7 i am going to take him and head back to vegas with me because that is where my heart is. my dads heart is in nevada and i feel him touch me everytime i go back there. everytime i enter a card room i am thinking about my dad. Sometimes I walk over to the game and the seat he used to always be at and rub the back of his chair. sometimes I go and expect him to be there. i look for him...i hope to hear his voice above the slot machines calling me telling me to hurry the hell up because there is a sucker playing 5/10.
hopefully i can meet a new woman in vegas but not a hooker or crack head this time..someone steady and who only does casual drugs and maybe vodka binges..a girl who respects a poker player and all he stands for and will not complain when ive got grind on the mind or when I want to get frisky and scan a credit card between her ass cheeks.
Last edited by King Niche; 07-03-2009 at 05:37 PM.
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Your stories are funny sometimes.
Keep it up !!!
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[x] I bet he gets pancakes a bathrobe and a hand-jive.
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[x] she sends me on negreanutilt
[x] go spread your thunder thighs for tod brunson i bet he hasnt had any in awhile
[x] stockings that made her legs look like submarines
[ ] these stories ever get boring.
5stars
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Once I saw your name, I just had to read the thread.
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I am so happy I am high when I'm reading this. This is so awesome I can't even explain it.
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would read again * * * * * stars
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Holy ****! are these stories you do 100% true?
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Quote:
she once made a recording of herself moaning for my birthday.. it was horrible. imagine an ogre scratching his bumhole and you will come close to understanding how it made me feel
LOL Awsome
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the king never fails to deliver
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You do know she's making you food to fat you up and eat you, right?
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[ ] brag
[x] beat
[ ] variance
[x] 5 Star Thread
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Quote:
Originally Posted by King Niche
hopefully i can meet a new woman in vegas but not a hooker or crack head this time..someone steady and who only does casual drugs and maybe vodka binges..a girl who respects a poker player and all he stands for and will not complain when ive got grind on the mind or when I want to get frisky and scan a credit card between her ass cheeks.
AWESOME
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big girls need love too.
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[x] pancakes
[x] a bathrobe
[x] and a hand-jive
