BBV Anonymous Confessions - Page 4 - Poker Beats Brags and Variance

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03-29-2007 , 11:25 AM

#76

onthebutton

Harbinger of Boobies

Join Date: Sep 2004 Posts: 4,203

Can we get back to confessionaments? Adanthar?

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03-29-2007 , 11:33 AM

#77

Tarheel

grinder

Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 597

Quote:

So what's your safety word?

Safety words are for limit players.

Lol, good stuff! Would read again!!

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03-29-2007 , 11:39 AM

#78

goofyballer

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 70,719

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Evenkeal dramament (note: this is as close to forum drama as I'm gonna post, since it's about a banned member)

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I sent an email to the dean of engineering at Waterloo University regarding Evenkeal's paying of someone to do his homework yesterday at 3:14AM, linking him to the relevant thread. He has not yet replied.

I was also the person who posted EK's life story at flopturnriver.com, and I also did it at fullcontactpoker and pocketfives. Some random guy from FTR posted saying that he had IP banned me from that site. He has not.

Wow, that's disgusting. Get someone booted from uni because they are annoying on an online forum.

agreed, this is [censored] sick

i hope ek finds you and kicks your ass... if he doesnt im sure you will get whats coming to you soon.

get a life and stay out of other ppls that you dont even know

So let me get this straight...

1. Evenkeal tries to get other kid busted for having BBV write his paper or whatever

2. Evenkeal asks someone else to write him a paper and posts about it in BBV

3. Everyone responds to this thread saying "I hope someone e-mails this thread to your teacher"

4. Someone e-mails this thread to his teacher

5. Everyone from step 3 calls that someone a douchebag? wtf? Hypocrites.

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03-29-2007 , 11:41 AM

#79

Big Poppa Smurf

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 4,013

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I don't care what anybody says, this is hot

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I have this first cousin who is very good looking. She is about 4 yrs younger than me. When I was 18 (her 14), she came to visit with her fam, and after a few weeks of flirting with me, one night we got drunk (last night she was here I think it was). We ended up making out, and she was so shitfaced she started grabbing on my ding dong yo! I knew it was wrong at the time, so i was just about to pull away. But just before I could my mom busts in. Yikes. mega-embarrassment. My mom ended up being cool with it and not telling anyone, but she always kept a watchful eye afterwards.

Sad thing is that as the years have gone by, little things like this have happened with her again and again. Now we don't kiss, she will usually just stick my hand down her pants (yay...) and let me play with her big boobs. I know this is all [censored] up, but she is really attractive with a sexy personality. [censored], even I know I would do it again. I don't know if i'd go all the way... but man is this f'd up.

flame away. ill pretend not to cry.

if this was my cousin i would have [censored] the [censored] out of her long ago

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03-29-2007 , 11:47 AM

#80

alphatmw

veteran

Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 2,402

Quote:

Evenkeal dramament (note: this is as close to forum drama as I'm gonna post, since it's about a banned member)

Quote:

Wow, that's disgusting. Get someone booted from uni because they are annoying on an online forum.

agreed, this is [censored] sick

i hope ek finds you and kicks your ass... if he doesnt im sure you will get whats coming to you soon.

get a life and stay out of other ppls that you dont even know

did anything even happen to cheer, the guy evenkeal ratted on? the most likely thing that will happen ek is nothing, followed by a 0 on the assignment, followed by an F in the class, followed by being kicked out the university (this is <<<<<<<<1% chance here).

in a vacuum, ratting someone out might warrant douchebaggery comments but this is just a case of poetic justice (if anything happens that is, which nothing will).

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03-29-2007 , 12:04 PM

#81

kyro

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: May 2004 Posts: 30,354

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Ironically, this one got filtered to my spam folder (get it, spam?)

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i am incredibly lazy. i haven't done laundry in 6 weeks, and have worn whatever has the least amount of stains on it since then. i've been wearing nothing but sandals for the past week because i am out of clean socks. today, i wore my last clean t shirt, and only have one pair of boxers that doesn't smell like balls. there are over 20 cups filled with various amounts of cola, water, and alcohol in my room. i don't actively go out and meet girls/try to get laid because it would mean that i would have to do some laundry and clean my room if i ever wanted anything to happen. i'm not gay or anything, but the infinite amount of porn online makes dating seem so much less attractive. basically, i hate a part of myself for being such an ambitionless slob.

Wow. I must have been drunk when I sent this, because I don't remember sending it.

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03-29-2007 , 12:21 PM

#82

Dids

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 60,871

If you like this thread: www.postsecret.com

I confess to nothing, if you see me in the streets, don't speak my name.

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03-29-2007 , 12:26 PM

#83

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

Degenerate gambling in BBV? You don't say

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I'm not much of an attention seeking person, but I really need to get this
off my chest. I post semi-regularly on the boards and am seen as a good
thinking smart player. What people don't know is that I am manic depressive
and have a huge gambling problem.

I will often jump 10 * the limit I'm playing because voices start to fill my
head and obviously lose. I'm in major debt right now although I have lent
out more than what I am debt for to friends and family that I don't expect
to get back. After everytime I go busto, I heavily contemplate suicide with
random thoughts of killing random people along with me. Sometimes a random
person will show up in my dream that I haven't thought of for a couple years
and I would have strong urges to take that person down with me. I feel that
there is a real strong possibility that this might happen down the line;
I've done major damage to my body already and don't value life nearly as
much as the next person.

edit: serious response: 1-800-GAMBLER seems like it's probably for you. You don't need to be anywhere around poker.

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03-29-2007 , 12:29 PM

#84

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

The Internet has been making people lie about themselves since Al Gore invented it

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I found out about a BBVer (it's the son of a higher up) and have tracked his posts for awhile now. Almost every post he writes is a blatant lie, and the rest are gross exaggerations. He's 5 years younger than he claims to be, obese, lonely, not well-liked and definitely not the 'balla' he claims to be. About the only thing he doesn't lie about is the stakes he plays.

I've chosen not to out him to this point because, well, he's got some emotional and psychological issues that he's dealing with, he's young, and I don't want to be the reason for his suicide.

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03-29-2007 , 12:30 PM

#85

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

Mike?

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I used to have fun being a normal college student, but ever since I tried coke I can not and do not party without it. Its really depressing. Even if I start drinking without it I seem to find some, no matter how drunk I am or how little money I have. My solution was to just stop partying as much, which sucks but whatever. P.S. I LOVE COCAINE!

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03-29-2007 , 12:32 PM

#86

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

Poker and women go hand in hand (get it, hand?)

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I've had sex with 5 women in my lifetime.

The first became a fullblown lesbian shortly after.

The second one because addicted to heroin and overdosed in the bathtub shortly after.

The third one I went limp oin a few minutes into it because of ecstasy.

The fourth was a fat troll.

The fifth was my best friends girl who denied me more sex the next day and then never spoke to me again.

I rule!

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I am a 21 year old, fairly good looking guy. I lost my virgnity at the age of 16 to an escort that I ordered off the internet. I saved up money from my job and called her over while my mother was at work. I ended up not being able to ejaculate because of anti-depressants I was on made it harder to cum, but when I would masturbate I could get off so I thought I would with her too. I didn't realize at the time though that because of the speed and intensity of which I masturbated, it would make real pussy feel not as good. Since this time I have ordered escorts on and off and probably spent close to $3000 on them since the age of 16.

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03-29-2007 , 12:33 PM

#87

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

Tip: after you murder your first pawnshop owner, don't go confessing the whole thing to the cops. It's messier that way.

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I'm in my early 20s and am a fairly succesful mid/high limit player with a mid 6 figure networth. I'm also probably the unhappiest person that i know. Over the past few years I've lost basically all my friends by ignoring them. I spend most of my time online. I haven't dated in over a year. I drink by myself on a regular basis and masturbate way too often, even though I don't really enjoy it anymore. I realize my lifes a mess but I can't make myself change it.

I've always looked down on basically everyone since I perceive myself as smarter than them but now I realize that all these 'inferior' people have happier, more meaningful lives than me and it makes me depressed as hell.

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03-29-2007 , 12:35 PM

#88

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

The answer to all those questions OOT asks itself daily

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When I was 23 (4 years ago) I went to the gym quite a bit. My lifting partner and I were pretty buff at that point and looked good (BEEFCAAAAAAKE!). We made fun of everyone else at the gym on a daily basis between ourselves and were horribly mean because we viewed them as inferior. One of the girls that came to the gym had terrible looking frizzy, curly hair, overweight by like 30 pounds, never talked to anyone, and was a rumored lesbian. She looked to be about 21 or 22. We made fun of her constantly. One day as I was leaving the gym I saw her in front of me walking to her car, she got into a brand new Range Rover as I walked to my old Honda. I suddenly saw the light. The next time I saw her at the gym I started talking to her and found out who her stepdad was through conversation. I found out that he bought and sold shopping malls and owned a very well known company in my city. I asked another person at the gym if he knew who she was and he laughed and mentioned how ugly she was and I laughed along with him. Then he told me her family was probably worth in excess of $100 million. I stopped laughing. I grew up poor (750 sq. ft house for 5 kids and parents) and I didn't want to be poor anymore. I launched an all out romantic attack on her, we started going out, she still may have been a lesbain but I didn't care, we eventually moved in together, I still couldn't look at her without cringing, and 2 years later we got married. This woman is now my wife.

Beat: I probably married a lesbian
Brag: Her parents bought us a $600,000 house in a country club subdivision that he owns for our wedding present and I work for her dad managing part of his real estate portfolio. I'm on salary at $240,000 a year. Her trust fund pays her $8800/month until she's 30 and she will receive a $10 million lump sum on her 30th birthday. He's 73 now and not doing well, the inheritance will be sick since he didn't have any kids on his own due to completely immersing himself in his business his entire life. I love the money, my wife can't cook and she's ugly, but I'm rich.
Variance: I married someone that I hate and can't look.

My advice to anyone thinking of doing the same thing, swallow your pride and marry the first time for money and the second time for love.

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03-29-2007 , 12:38 PM

#89

eviljeff

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 8,485

just tried e-mailing and the address doesn't work. so basically all of these have been adanthar so far.

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03-29-2007 , 12:39 PM

#90

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

This man can't even get email to work

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just tried e-mailing and the address doesn't work. so basically all of these have been adanthar so far.

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03-29-2007 , 12:46 PM

#91

Noah.

banned

Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 20,057

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The answer to all those questions OOT asks itself daily

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limon?

lol

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03-29-2007 , 12:48 PM

#92

skunkworks

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 7,374

Quote:

just tried e-mailing and the address doesn't work. so basically all of these have been adanthar so far.

hahahahahaha

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03-29-2007 , 12:53 PM

#93

Ghazban

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 5,874

Quote:

Tip: after you murder your first pawnshop owner, don't go confessing the whole thing to the cops. It's messier that way.

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Raskolnikov?

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03-29-2007 , 12:55 PM

#94

Triumph36

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 40,914

[censored] i didn't even catch the reference - so much for being educated.

this has the potential to become good - though half these stories are made up.

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03-29-2007 , 01:03 PM

#95

Gildwulf

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 23,491

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This man can't even get email to work

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just tried e-mailing and the address doesn't work. so basically all of these have been adanthar so far.

lmfao

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03-29-2007 , 01:05 PM

#96

banned

Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 3,073

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This man can't even get email to work

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just tried e-mailing and the address doesn't work. so basically all of these have been adanthar so far.

lmfao

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03-29-2007 , 01:26 PM

#97

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

The bad news is, there's no way a Stars check will get there by Tuesday

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I lost my rent $ for last month and this month gambling and I have to come up with it by Tuesday or else I have a court date and I have to explain why I don't have it to a judge and I could still get evicted. I'm thinking about maxing out some jewelry store credit cards and pawning the stuff since I'm already in debt anyway and my credit is toast. It's a short term solution but it's a solution. I don't have a job or a source of income so I'm basically pawning for rent and a bankroll and trying to robusto it on Stars. This is probably not a great idea since it's hard to play when you know you need the money, but in the time frame I'm working with I don't see any other reasonable option. If it doesn't work I'm not sure what I'm going to do and I'm pretty scared that it won't work.

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03-29-2007 , 01:41 PM

#98

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

As long as she didn't also turn lesbian, OD on heroin, and never speak to you again, you're still winning this round

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I have been whored out to a fat chick so my buddy could score pills. I got laid and a 12-pack buzz just to cope with it. The worst part is that I don't care. This happened on two separate occasions. Most of the women I have slept with have been 6+ (up to a 9.5), this girl was a 3.5.

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03-29-2007 , 02:32 PM

#99

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

The Wonder Years

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When I was in grade three we had a giant snowball fight at recess. There was this girl that I liked and I kept throwing snowballs at her because that's what ******ed kids do, and she kept saying "stop it!" or some bs like that, so I went and built a snow man with my friends. About 5 minutes later I saw a bunch of kids still snow ball fighting and I decided it would be funny to grab some of those tiny rocks from the playground and throw them into the crowd, but I specifically aimed at the girl that I liked. I threw them when no one was paying attention to me and there was a couple bigger rocks in there that I guess I didn't notice and I nailed her right in the face. She started crying and the recess supervisors ran over to help her and there was a huge crowd that I just kind of became a part of. They took her to the nurse then she came back to our classroom like 30 minutes after recess was over. The teacher asked the class who did it and no one raised their hand so finally being the quick thinker I am I said "it was probably one of the older kids". Later that day I started making fun of her again, I was as smooth with the ladies then as I am now.

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03-29-2007 , 03:03 PM

#100

adanthar

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 20,109

This is an example of how not to write a fake post

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I get my boyfreind. a HSNL player and well known to these forums, to take pics of me in the shower - When i see my own pics, it makes me hot, and is the only time i let him SIIMP

quoted for ineptitude

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