Based. Live limit spread pro and doggy daycare dad. Not a bad gig!

Woke up at 6, walked the dogs for 8 hours, took a shower, then made the 15 minute drive up to Running Aces where I booked an improbable 8th straight winning session. Biggest hand of the night was this one against a guy who was about 11 Coors deep:

I open limp A9hh in CO, Button and SB call, Drunk raises to 45 from BB. I 3-bet to 145, only Drunk calls. Flop T64r. He x I x. Turn T. He bets 60 I call. River 3. He bets 100 I call. He has K2, MHIG.

That guy went through about $1800 in an hour—I’ve gotta play more on Friday nights!

I racked up as soon as he ran out of money and got home in time to read some Encyclopedia Brown to my kid before he went to bed. I’m in such a great place!

Your cockiness is you're weakness, be careful at the tables

You might be the best spread limit player of all time.

My MasterClass to crushing rural Minnesotans at $2-$100 spread-limit Hold’em is now available for only $899.99, but I’ll give it to you all for free:

Step 1: Just follow any basic preflop RFI/3-bet chart; and

Step 2: If you get raised on the River and you don’t have the nuts: Fold.

Played for just one hour today (after walking the dogs in the morning):

* had Aces cracked by KQ spiking 2-pair on the River in a $300 pot

* flopped a set of Jacks and lost to a turned Flush in a $400 pot

* somehow crawled out of there with a (tiny) winning session, thanks to some young guy with tats who decided to bluff everything off to me with ace-high cuz he was sick of me raising so much.

I’ve now played 300 hours, and my win rate has dropped all the way down to…24 BBs per hour. I’m up $14,661.

I think I’m good at poker.

you're good at poker......so far

How does one lose a "fake email job" ?

I am questioning the op's life choices.

[X] Fake Email Jorb

[X] Free Time at the Local Casino

In for $500, out for $872 in a 2-hour session of STREET POKER today. My two biggest pots were both won with ace-high!

Hand 1: 3 players limp in for $2. Villain raises to $24 in the Small Blind. I 3-bet to $72 with Ad8c in the BB. Everyone folds to the SB who calls. Flop Kd7d3h. He checks, I check. Turn Qc. He bets $100, I call with hopes and dreams. River Ks. He bets $100, I call, he says "ten-high" and I am a happy camper.

Hand 2: I limp UTG with AcTs. UTG2 (with a stack of $120) overlimps), a few more do as well. Villain--same Villain from before--makes it $20 in the Big Blind. I do the ol' limp-reraise trick with my ATo and make it $80. But UTG2 ruins my fun by jamming and making it $120. Everyone folds to the Big Blind who tanks for a bit before raising to $220 (so there's now $100 in the side pot). I reraise and make it $320 with the ol' Ace-Ten offsuit, and somehow the Big Blind just calls. (I only have $160 behind at this point.) Flop comes down KK5 with two hearts. Big Blind checks, I bet $100, and he.....folds? Even though there's $860 out there? Okey dokey. I laugh at UTG2 and say "don't worry, you're way ahead man" as I table my hand, but he says "Nope, I'm on a draw" and tables....97 of hearts??? Turn 2x river 3x and I win a $760 pot with Ace-Ten high.

wow it seems you possess a lot of raw talent. Keep it up man. well played.

The trick is to be a little bit better than the worst player at the table, and no more.

Update:

I’ve won 19 of my last 20 sessions, and am now back up to 26 BBs per hour over 341 hours.

Clearly you saved up all your run good during that hibernation period in the middle of the graph. I'm onto you davomalvolio

That is one hell of a win rate for 1/2!

I did put a pretty bad beat on a guy in my biggest pot on Thursday night:

He limps, I raise to $20 in the SB w AcAs, he calls, naturally. Flop T86cc. I check he bets $40 I check-raise to $140, he reraises to $240, I call. Turn 6x. I trust my LIVE READ that he hates this card, and bet $100, he calls. River 2x, I bet $100, he calls with T8s, SORRY SIR.

I owe it all to the dogs. They are helping me at the poker table.

are you a drake fan? That must explain it

I lost $1000 today. Now I BLAME it on the dogs.

Now that's the least believable post of this entire thread

I played $5-$100 spread-limit Omaha today for the first time in my life. I barely knew the rules—I’ve only ever played “free money” games online.

But there I was, playing deeper than I’ve ever been at any Hold’em game in my life! (Obviously the $100 cap severely reduces my risk. But still! Bought in three $300 bullets but rolled my last one up to $2100 and left before they could take it back!)

Ok. Played 3 hours of Omaha yesterday and made $1170. Then played 12 hours of Hold’em and…lost $9.

I may have forgotten how to play Holdem.

UTG raises to $10.
Button calls.
DAVO MALVOLIO raises to $40 in SB.
BB cold-calls.
UTG calls.
Button calls.

FLOP: TcTh6s (pot: $160)

DAVO MALVOLIO checks.
BB bets $100.
UTG calls all-in for $100.
Button folds.
DAVO MALVOLIO raises to $200.
BB calls all-in for $170.

Turn: TcTh6s 9d
River: TcTh6s 9d 8s

Showdown:

DAVO MALVOLIO: KhKc (two-pair, Kings and Tens)
UTG: JhJc (two-pair, Jacks and Tens)
BB: QsJs (straight, 8 to Queen)

BB wins $600 with a straight, 8 to Queen.



I’m a good man. I pay my taxes. I go to church. Why do bad things happen to me?

Says the guy who was bragging two weeks ago that he won 19 of 20 previous sessions. Hubris much?

what a great thread this is