how the hell am i suppose to build a bank roll when i lost it this fast. basically this is what happened.

i deposit 500 into my FT account and go play 3 60$ sit and go's i lose 2 and win one so im basically up 35$ or something. I play pretty good and i probably should of stuck to those for awhile but poker bores the **** out of me if i aint playing higher stakes because it feels like i have a 9-5 job or some **** if i play micro.

anyway i go heads up. at first nobody wants to play and im baffled by this. i go to like 5 different 100nl heads up tables and they all sit out so im thinking there afk or something i finally find a table with someone willing to play. he has 400$ in a 100 max table so im thinking this guys pretty good. so im always up for a challenge and start playing him.

2 hands in i get delt like A-J and i raise and he calls. and it comes like 3-4-6 . I bet again and he calls so im thinking hes got high cards or something. and a Jack comes so it looks like this

3-4-6-J

I bet of course and he calls. at this point the pot is like 60$ so im basically pot commited and the last card doesnt matter because he flips over 7-5. he flopped the nuts.

So i think yeah this is a pretty bad beat and he acknowledges it. I rebuy in and the very next hand its

8-9
i bet
he calls

flop comes
6-5-7

i check.
he bets.
i re-raise.
he pushes all in. at this point im like **** yeah i got my money back that i just lost.

turn comes.
6-5-7-7

the river...

6-5-7-7-5

...

in less than 5 hands i basically lost 200$ of course at this point i was tilting a little but not to much because i knew this guy wasnt that great and hes just getting insanely lucky. well about 1 and a half hour later im basically out 300$ more. from the hands i saw to the end he sucked out probably 8/10 times when i was ahead.

i really had no luck at all. my cards weren't hitting and the only pots i was winning were probably 70% bluffs.

but anyway the point im trying to make is how do i build confidence in myself and in a certain poker site when i get horrible beats like this every time i deposit? I cant do lower limits and i refuse to. Its too boring.

btw im not a degen or anything i dont reload after i lose it all until like a week later when im cooled down. but i got plenty of money to burn i make a great living but i just have a doom switch when it comes to poker i guess. anyone have any suggestions on what i should do? hire a coach?

Next time don't play NL, play limit instead. You're sure to win.

lol oh **** i just looked over this and forgot to post what he had on the second hand. he had a-5.