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Originally Posted by lastcardcharlie
That depends on the crime, of course.
You mean that certain crimes indicate that you be placed in the underclass, or certain crimes indicate that you come from the underclass? (I am sure that other "ors" exist)
"Upper class transvestite crack whore" doesn't get mentioned in the press very often.
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I was convicted of conspiracy to commit criminal damage against and burgle a non-dwelling property. What is a reasonable period of atonement for that?
Well, proper atonement can be attained by everyone having a hearty laugh about you being horrible at being such a criminal for having to be convicted of "conspiracy to commit." Or prison time. Well, both, I guess.
It really isn't hard to actually damage or burgle a building, but I am sure there were good reasons why you felt the need to conspire. Of course, if you have a tendency towards trying such things, it isn't really that bad to be incompetent, so long as you quickly learn that it is outside of your capabilities. Would be quite the shame if you led a life of almost committing profitable crimes.
So, atonement has been attained.
I don't think that atonement is the issue. When someone does something rare (almost, but not quite, damaging and burgling a non-dwelling) it sticks out as an important fact about them and such things are generally thought to be worthy of taking care should they do so again (past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior).
This probably explains why the U.S. won't admit you. We have loads of non-dwellings here. Quite obviously you have paid for your previous crimes, but we just don't feel like we can trust you.
(Found out that one of my good friends got out of jail a couple of days ago for his second felony breaking and entering. He had "and burglary" the first time and "attempted burglary" the second time. He is getting worse at it.)
(I've never been convicted. "Always the accused, never the convicted" as the saying goes.)
I highly suggest getting a monocle, black tall silk hat and a nice cane. It will give you just the right air of superiority that the upper class has. Err, I might have the upper class and Mr. Peanut confused again.