lol I want that on a shirt

That’s a hall of fame post

I really need to learn to speak Spanish. Short of spending a few months in Mexico anyone have an experience based recommendation as to the best way? Formerly fluent in French which I assume will be both helpful and annoying.

ok lol but well that is the lesson i failed to heed with the 30 year old skinny chick. hookup lesson #1. but there is a caveat, hookup lesson number umm 5. ok i dont have an actual list.

so i have known this girl for a couple years, when i met her she was dating my best friend who was 50 at the time, and she was 28, so i knew she was kinda ****ed up and i had a shot. i didnt even want to look at her when i met her, thats his girl, and she was stunning. hurt my eyes. so they break up pretty quickly. he tells me she is fun to f. but troubled for sure. idk what the treatment center was for in her text.

she was assaulted by a guy in the military. and my friend said when they would f, she wouldnt look at him. she would look away. like she was scared or ashamed or idk.

going in, i knew this girl was dangerous. by that i mean i knew a little about the substance abuse...and i heard some stories about how she is vindictive in breakups. one example, not of breakkups, but her cousin was murdered, she had to drive to el paso, she texted me and i asked her if she had been drinking, she said yes, i told her to sober up and not speed. like 6 hours later she posts of facebook of her speedmeter at 120 through the desert and her comment like whooo! look at this!!... prolly drunk.

but she is so little and hot...so we make a date. i have my second date with demon gift girl, first was just coffee but we snap chatted and it was on, so i have my second date with demon gift at 9pm that same night. i meet this little girl in the hot tub at 6pm. I think i got enough time. anatta got ricky henderson speed and can lead off with a dinger as well.

so she tells me more stories of ex's...like calling a marine friend on him to threaten him. and ok...she sent...and i dont get this really, but she sent naked pictures of another ex to his family. she also facebook outed him somehow. like telling personal things about him on facebook where his friends can see it or something. i facebook but not sure how it all works...but the whole thing gave me pause. but she is so little and hot.

so we are hanging out, making out. and yes she is looking away all nervous. but i like that. that only turns me on more. one can do a lot fantasy wise with a little girl looking all scared...but its like 8:30.

so i am torn, but figure ok, i will tell her i have to go. i do, she looks surprised and disappointed. but i think, its cool, she will think im a nice guy, really into her, and i will hit that on our next date. but i am also thinking, anatta is sex with this girl a good idea or are you going to get your ass kicked by a marine or your mom gonna see your junk or something? see you have to have some sense. a trust your instincts. lesson 5. i really was conflicted so that is another reason i left.

but lesson one is this, i leave, get demon gift home, its awesome. but the next day, little hottie texts me that she is moving to laguna beach on friday. im like wtf wtf. so the last time i see this girl is me dropping off some dollie for her to use to move. she tells me she wishes we had more time.

alright lesson number one. its basic. round the bases! she is the 3rd base coach. she puts the stop signs on. not you! you kiss her, great, get her to your f pad. have a f pad, a place you can take her. i mean that is like...trying for a baseball reference and cant find one. but your place, her place, a van i dont care need a bat to hit, need a f pad to hit that...anatta stopped himself and ended up stranded on 2nd. no runs, one hit, one anatta error, and one man left on base.

but yeah it was probably for the best. the demon gift was younger, a joy, and she didnt have me killed. might have missed out on that if i stood her up. lesson 5. have some sense. trust your instincts.

i told u guys i got a few female friends who tell me about men. i have been told a lot about "nice guys". they tell me that they think they are pussies. they use that word. so rookies dont think all these pretty sweet girls are nice girls. not saying there arent nice girls in the world...

but ok, when i was young i was telling this bartender about how i was going slow with this girl since she was nice. he told me "anatta i took her home and f'd her in the ass the first time she was in here". i mean that was good to know because i took her home and f'd her in the ass that night. but what if i didnt get that info. all wining and dining this whore and **** cuz she is so nice. yeah hey why dont u marry that girl she is so nice anatta...

so nice girls exist, if you find a good woman...i told you they are invaluable. i never would have gotten my start in the real world without a steady woman who i was committed to, didnt cheat on, settled down with...now she wasnt exactly nice, but she was faithful, honest, and wanted me to make money. and did everything she could to make that happen.

its tiring to run around and cheat. if you are drinking and cheating and can still compete in this world, my hat is off to you.

Young man’s game really

this reminds me to say, look i am like a senior pga tour champ. i know a few younger guys who laugh at my scores. the girls they turn down make me cry. they grew up on tinder. they know what i know at half my age.

Wait till you add some bulk to those calves. Then you are really gonna bring the noise.

yeah i never really work them. maybe do some toe raises if i can remember to do it. i dont think i have good calve genetics cuz when i was young i worked em. didnt seem to improve all that much.

Calves are a fat man's game, have to do a Christian Bale fat->cut cycle to build them up

No shame in going the implant route. Us old dudes are on the clock.

rule number 2 and again this is basic and again another which i did not heed...last night in fact and am paying for it this morning. dont put the handle of your toothbrush up your girls ass unless you have another toothbrush. i get that your toothbrush is old and you need a new one and its motivation to buy another...but how about buying a few so you dont have this problem or u know preparing in advance with something else to put in her ass? i know u guys have been around the block and this is basic but i dont want any rookie maybe even in their cavity prone years lurkers to have to hold their only toothbrush near the bristles and have to brush really quickly.

Everyone knows that you use a mechanical toothbrush and then the free ones they give away at the dentist are to be used as sex toys. Grab a handful when they aren't looking

or you could not go brush side in up the ass to preserve the integrity of the morning teeth clean

LOL you got this exactly backwards.

This sounds like a joke post but isn't: when they first started making "electric toothbrushes" in the 50s, they were literally just vibrators. The toothbrush attachment was just added so they could be sold in stores.

i am going to buy vitamin D and zinc per chris V recs. I take "Yohimbine" (the gnc speed boner pill). And, like i said, the viagra and cialis combo. The Weider prime has Vit D and zinc but its efficacy has been questioned. Chris gave me another rec and I wish i didnt have to order it and I am traveling soon. I might go for it and have it shipped to texas, i do want it.

But anybody got any suggestions. I was good for a lot of sex very recently but got on something called gabapentin for a nerve injury and to get high. It is a great buzz, kind chills me out though. I want man u know peak libido. hardons arent the problem, i am on the best stuff for that... but after one time i am getting lazy...maybe twice...u know man its normal especially at my age but i want drug induced abnormality.

So, different from every post you make how?

whiskey viagra and blow and then something for the inevitable heartburn is just what the doctor ordered

lol. whiskey and blow oh yeah how could i forget thanks. and tums too good idea.

FACK secret santa is going to be highly enjoyable this year if anatta joins.

jar of cummies

story?

posts like this are why tut can never fall below a top tier poster list, laughed a lot at it

+1, this is like a christmas surprise, havent checked 2p2 in 2 days and im welcomed by this