Quote:
Originally Posted by Anacardo
TSC,
I would enjoy and honor the man's tribute post, fwiw.
Here it is
Preface: I always liked this player, but I feel in the spirit of this thread I would bash a player in tribute to my friend and former 2p2’er Kerssens, who is no longer with us (RIP). I know he would have instantly posted a 500 word diatribe about this one player, so I’ll try to match his venom and intensity, but I know I will never be able to write this with the same vigor.
Jay Buhner
Widely loved in Seattle as a Mariner legend and icon, as well as being a punch line in a classic Seinfeld joke, Jay Buhner has always been a giant knuckleheaded turd to me. He rode the coat tails of Ken Griffey Jr. for so many years. Some say Griffey looked so good defensively because he constantly had to cover for the pathetic Buhner. The same was true at the plate. Griffey knew he had to hit dingers since if he didn’t, he knew Buhner would strand the runners on base with an inevitable strike out to end the inning. All in all, Buhner was as a constant liability to an otherwise great Mariner team. Buhner also had a penchant for sliding catches in right field, however anyone with a brain knew he had to slide to make the catch because he was so freaking slow in the first place. “Amazing catch!” Niehuas would say, but come on Dave, it’s because he sucks and is slow. He made the routine look amazing! Also, don’t even get me started on the stance and the stupid hand flapping thing whenever you were up to bat. You sucking and being stupid go hand in hand.
Buhner’s on field performance aside, the worst part about this moron was seeing him constantly on TV doing commercials and interviews. None of us wanted to listen to the dumb hick talk about hunting and his stupid boat, you stupid moron. Also, Buhner Buzz cut night? Since when did a bald man deserve a haircut night dedicated to him? So yeah, I hate Jay Buhner, one of the most overrated idiots to grace the game of baseball. Jay Buhner, the day you retired, babies around the world wept for joy.
Last edited by ThaSaltCracka; 11-04-2009 at 02:01 PM.