Welcome to the best weekend of the NFL year. The Coachella of sports, minus the drugs. I'll be in Vegas, which puts me in a rare good mood.

The four bye teams are #1, #2, #4 and #5 in offensive DVOA. The hot take is "offensive league." My take is lol NFL reffing.

Before the handicapping, did everyone see the Bears owner last week? LOLOLOLOL 100 year old people being in charge of billion dollar businesses. Apparently one of her kids was elevated to GM after 3 years running...ticket sales. This after the other failson quit or died or who knows what. For the final time this year: TAX CAPITAL, NOT LABOR. Shout out to Trevor Lawrence, who absolutely should not play one more snap of college football to further enrich a bunch of old white douchebags.

Colts at Chiefs -5

Best bet of the week on the Colts here. Several issues for the Chiefs. First, there're the Chiefs, its the playoffs, their coach is Andy Reid. Next, lol RBs and all, but the Hunt thing seems to matter. Reek the pregnant gf beating freak is obviously injured. And no way the cold helps Mahomie. I'll say it again, Frank Reich is awesome. Finally, the KC defense is terrible. Can't stop the run, can't stop the pass. Not great, Bob. Look for Suzzer to roll into the thread about mid 3rd quarter to complain about the refs.

Dallas at Rams -7

I have no opinion on the spread in this game. I do have an opinion on Jason Garrett. You know what it is. Because he is sure to be an idiot in a close game, I like teasing the Rams with the Saints. Loyal readers will recall I advised a 3 team teaser last week, which cashed easily. Anyone who feels compelled to thank me for giving away $$$ can PM me for my PayPal.

Chargers at Patriots -4

I love the Pats here. Why? First, the Pats have the biggest home road split in the league. Second, BB vs. Lynn is like Dvaut1 vs. Ikestoys. Third, Rivers is hurt/old/both. Fourth, think about how this game will be officiated. Obligatory "pour one out for Marty." Fun fact - Rivers played on a torn ACL vs. the Pats (and lost by 10). In the last 10 years, I've gone from hating to loving to hating to loving the guy. He's indisputably entertaining.

Eagles at Saints -8

I think this is the end for BDN. Saints at home are averaging all the points, and the Eagles pass rush won't matter against Brees because he throws instantly. Pro tip: take the Saints team total over 29.5 here - protection against the backdoor cover.

If anyone needs me, I'll be at the Wynn sports book. Enjoy the action. No HALF WIT this week (I think)!

In before Chilly

Colts
Rams
Pats
Eagles

Colts are winning; Suzze.r will melt down.

That is all.

Colts
Rams but Cowboys cover
Pats
Saints but BDN puts up 30 points

Chargers outright
kc/colts should be great. Like KC but idk if they cover.

Chiefs in a 3 OT thriller
Rams in a mild blowout
Chargers by infinity
Saints in a 10 OT barnburner

Chefs
Rams
Pats
Aints

Cant wait - just hoping for good games, epic drama and minimal whining about refs.

people like the Colts? Against the GOAT? Wat?

Chiefs' O>>>Colts D

Colts' O>>>>>>>>Chiefs D

The Reich Stuff>>>>>Send out the kicking team!!!

Should be a great game.

lol "Rivers is hurt/old/both." Great excuses OP, during what nut huggers want to deem his best season, and squaring off against a 40 year old.

U mad?

So furious, hence the lol.

Colts get outscored in high scoring affair, 34-30;
Cowboys keep it close and low scoring in the rain but lose, 20-16;
Rivers goes 0-8 against Brady, 27-16;
Eagles pull off miracle 30-27.

Chefs at home in the playoffs, what could go wrong

even if the Colts are down 13 late... I can see them scoring with like 4 minutes left and a full compliment of timeouts, then Andy Reid calling some conservative crap. Mahomes might legit have to veto that **** in the huddle.

I'm looking forward to Mahomeboy overcoming Andy Reid doing Andy Reid things.

I mean, they aren't going to win the Super Bowl, but they might be able to win this game.

Chiefs
Cowboys
Chargers
Caints

Man, I sure hope it doesn’t rain in LA. The Coli field is going to be slick enough.

At least this year they didn’t replace the turf a couple weeks before the game (at least I hope not), last year’s surface for Falcons/Rams was a disgrace.

Hoping Rams but ghosts of the past are everywhere. Falcons put on a tackling clinic last year in WC game, gave them a wedgie and stole their dates. McVay the genius didn’t adjust worth a damn.

Chargers winning 35 - 17. Brady will look average 2tds and 2 ints. Rivers will be running up and down the sideline like a giddy teenager.

Awesome, thanks for sharing. Lol’d hard at Marchibroda calling timeout to THINK ABOUT IT then running his kicker out for a 47 yarder when it’s -6 degrees on 4th and 2.

64 deg in LA Sunday, 25 in Foxborough.

I wouldnt mind it at all but I cant see Rivers ever warming up.

yeah I'm sure the 8-0 home team that averages 38 a game is gonna lose like that

So, Gronk’s last game should be interesting.