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Page 892 of 1895

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Page 892 of 1895

First

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Last

12-20-2015 , 10:45 PM

#22276

THEGOATIAN

veteran

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 2,625

I thought the BBC personality award was meant to be ironic. Didn't Michael Owen win it once?

12-20-2015 , 10:52 PM

#22277

Lars1

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 4,971

Didn't Giggs get it too? Although I guess that might have been before he slept with his brothers pregnant wife.

12-20-2015 , 11:15 PM

#22278

THEGOATIAN

veteran

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 2,625

Nobody remembers that anymore mate, he played til he was 40 so he could have actually slept with his brother and he'd be still get a statue.

12-20-2015 , 11:44 PM

#22279

mw828

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 29,301

lol

12-21-2015 , 12:11 AM

#22280

DemonOfTheFall

veteran

Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 2,789

This article from F365 cracked me up.

Spoiler:

http://www.football365.com/news/foot...-over-analysis

Quote:

On Saturday afternoon, Chelsea supporters chose to protest against the behaviour and attitude of several key players. Fans felt these players had betrayed Jose Mourinho and caused his sacking. Because the one thing a man who victimised a key member of staff with gender-based slurs prides himself on is professionalism.

One of those banners is displayed above. The Creator was not satisfied with demonstrating their love and gratitude for The (A?) Departed One, but instead attacked those apparently most responsible.

We have a right to respond, and feel we must do so. There are so very many issues:

1) Why the use of individual blocks to comprise the letters rather than one single shape? Presume that this is to reflect the disparate nature of Chelsea’s current squad, the conflicting personalities making up the whole shape? That’s probably it.

Or is it to look like stones placed on top of each other – the ‘T’ is particularly good for this – an attack on the caveman behaviour displayed by the players? They are such simplistic beasts after all. Again, very droll.

2) Why the need to extend the ‘3’ to give it longer arms (are they arms? They can’t be arms but gone with arms now)? Were you worried it just looked like a squiggle before that, or maybe a snake? Actually, that snake reference could have worked. Adding a forked tongue and stripes to your ‘3’ would have added an artistic flair sadly lacking from the original. Everyone’s a critic nowadays.

3) We’ve now arrived at the word ‘rats’, and must pause there. It’s superb imagery, that much is beyond question. It’s just that you can’t but help notice that the first letter has definitely been altered.

There’s no denying it, it says ‘bats’. Your mind plays clever tricks on you as you read it casually for the first time, but look again: ‘bats’.

Spurious website likeacat.com (honestly, here’s the full link http://www.likeacat.com/bat-symbolism_ep_53-1.html) says the following on bat imagery: ‘Bats are symbols of rebirth – the facing of fears and being reborn. Through this we learn to release fear and anything which does not fit with our new growth.’
Actually, they’ve nailed it. This is the rebirth of Chelsea, and these three players. Hats off.

The website continues: ‘The bat is a symbol of the challenge to let go of the old and create the new – death and rebirth. To many this is distressing, thus so much negativity around it. They symbolize the facing of fears – entering the dark on the way to the light. The Chinese were one of the few exceptions, because to them, the bat symbolized good fortune and great happiness.’
This is spooky now. Chelsea have let go of Mourinho and are replacing him. Roman Abramovich also has lots of money and good fortune. ‘Abramovich’ also contains two letters of the word ‘bat’. Coincidence? Pah.

It’s meant to say ‘rats’, isn’t it. Which is more than a little sinister.

4) Next comes the numbers of the three players, placed above their names like the heads of traitors placed on spikes. They are in quotation marks, but placed not only in the traditional location above the letters but also below. Not quite sure why, to be honest. Do four speech marks indicate an urge for the multitude to hound out these traitors together, deriding them with one communal voice?

Probably not, on reflection.

5) Most of the focus over the word ‘Hazzard’ focuses on the ‘zz’ in the middle, or more importantly the superfluous ‘z’. Is this ‘zz’ a subtle dig at Hazard’s ability to send Chelsea supporters off to sleep this season. Quick, someone run a tap with tepid-but-not-cold-because-that’s-a-common-misconception water, because Eden got burned!

In fact, there is probably a much more simple explanation. The Creator is clearly just a fan of Bo, Luke and Daisy Duke.

6) Straightening off that second ‘Z’ was unnecessary. It still looks like a lightning bolt, but now a messy lightning bolt that you f*cked up before trying to correct.

Still, that’s hindsight for you, and nothing is mocked more by hindsight than permanent marker on white cotton.

7) Let’s play a game, and be honest. You’re only cheating yourselves, remember. Did you notice that it says ‘IAZZARD’ rather than ‘HAZ(Z)ARD’?

Us neither. Bang goes the ‘Dukes of…’ theory then, but in comes another. The ‘Ia’ to start the surname is an ingenious Shakespearean dig at Hazard – he is the villainous Iago. “And what’s he then that says I play the villain.”

8) Nothing but love for referring to Fabregas as ‘Cesl’.

It conjures up the image of an old lord called Cecil, strolling about the midfield wearing a monocle and regularly holding up his hand in apology for a misplaced simple pass.

EDIT: Could also be a tribute to Cecil the Lion, as there is a lion on Chelsea’s badge. Even I don’t believe this sh*t any more.

#PrayForCecil

9) What’s the first rule of banner-making? Plan out the words first and fit them in accordingly.

Nobody cares for letters squeezed into the end of lines with blank white spaces like icy deserts on the other side. Shoddy.

What’s worse – spending time and money making a banner to take to a football match, or spending 20 minutes of your evening writing about one. Answer that while I close down likeacat.com.

Daniel Storey

12-21-2015 , 03:03 AM

#22281

SootedPowa

veteran

Join Date: Jun 2013 Posts: 3,340

Tyson Fury not winning explained here

Spoiler:

12-21-2015 , 03:44 AM

#22282

Hoopie1

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 26,081

Fury should never have been nominated because of that stupid back-handed jab that he does. Replace his nomination with Joe Root and SPOTY is solved.

12-21-2015 , 03:59 AM

#22283

Tall Paul

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 9,372

Quote:

Originally Posted by Consty

Which makes the team award all the more baffling.

I don't know who won the team award, presumably, from your comment, it was the Davis Cup team.

I don't think the team award is voted for by the public, so there's no connection between that and the individual award. Most votes would have been cast before the team award winner was known.

------------------------------------------

And if disagreeing with sexism and homophobia makes me a "PC Bro", sign me up.

12-21-2015 , 04:47 AM

#22284

LostOstrich

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Join Date: Jan 2008 Posts: 15,933

Sports Personality is only a high profile award because the BBC throw so much promotional effort behind it and have historically run the excellent Sports Review Of The Year around the award, but essentially it's just a public poll on a combination of achievement and likeability. In terms of raw sporting achievment, Fury had a solid claim to the title, but it's also a popularity contest and he's clearly not well liked by the general public.

The less outspoken / more dull characters like Murray and Hamilton are more likely to be judged solely on their sporting achievments, which often results in the apparent irony of a Sports Personality award going to someone who offers little in terms of personality.

12-21-2015 , 04:51 AM

#22285

royalblue

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Mar 2010 Posts: 20,554

In sports, "personality" is often used as an euphamism for being a douchebag

12-21-2015 , 06:36 AM

#22286

cashy

we have welbeck

Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 29,767

not looking forward to the game without alexis as we currently don't have the CM to dominate and without him there isn't enough individual quality on the counter apart from özil, would take a draw.

12-21-2015 , 06:39 AM

#22287

MindFckr

Classic Arsenal GHW

Join Date: Aug 2010 Posts: 25,609

4-3 to the Arsenal. I think there is plenty of counter attacking power even without Alexis- btw there are some rumors that Alexis is back in training and might feature in the starting lineup. I think that would be a big risk, but given he is a superhuman I'll take it. 3pts for full-blown boomin' from my part.

Also Kompany isn't back which should be huge, City looked far from unbeatable and if Özil Özils I see no reason why we couldn't keep the 3pts at home

12-21-2015 , 06:40 AM

#22288

39suited

But it was suited

Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 8,189

Game plan for the gunners today: Park the bus, get lucky on a corner.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SootedPowa

Tyson Fury not winning explained here

Spoiler:

FYP.

Last edited by 39suited; 12-21-2015 at 06:46 AM.

12-21-2015 , 06:43 AM

#22289

cashy

we have welbeck

Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 29,767

Quote:

Originally Posted by MindFckr

btw there are some rumors that Alexis is back in training and might feature in the starting lineup. I think that would be a big risk, but given he is a superhuman I'll take it. 3pts for full-blown boomin' from my part.

not even participated in training so i doubt it

12-21-2015 , 06:46 AM

#22290

MindFckr

Classic Arsenal GHW

Join Date: Aug 2010 Posts: 25,609

So...

I wouldn't mind giving Gabriel a start over Mert if Aguero is back, but given we managed 2 clean sheets in a row with this defense, I doubt Wenger will change it.

12-21-2015 , 06:49 AM

#22291

LostOstrich

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Join Date: Jan 2008 Posts: 15,933

if Alexis comes off the bench for the last 10 mins fanny will go into ragetilt mode, so I'm mostly just rooting for that

12-21-2015 , 06:57 AM

#22292

MindFckr

Classic Arsenal GHW

Join Date: Aug 2010 Posts: 25,609

Quote:

Originally Posted by LostOstrich

if Alexis comes off the bench for the last 10 mins fanny will go into ragetilt mode, so I'm mostly just rooting for that

Giroud hattrick, Özil 3 assists, clean sheet for Bellerin. Is that too much to ask for? lolz

12-21-2015 , 07:22 AM

#22293

Join Date: Oct 2013 Posts: 8,132

Quote:

Originally Posted by MindFckr

Giroud hattrick, Özil 3 assists, clean sheet for Bellerin. Is that too much to ask for? lolz

That would be nice.

12-21-2015 , 07:37 AM

#22294

unwantedguest

Guest

Posts: n/a

Lenny

Might get your wish for Xmas bazooka.

12-21-2015 , 07:49 AM

#22295

bazooka87

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 22,050

Wow I only just read. And we might avoid administration! For those others who haven't read:
Bolton probe Neil Lennon over claims he made knife threat to mistress after she threatened to expose their affair.

Aah I've found a fatal flaw in her story, she's suggesting that she was with him the night before a win, which is obviously impossible.