It's not "still" being emotionally confused, it's going against everything it took to get over her in the first place. Sleeping with her only adds a new layer of crap to deal with when she's up and gone. It's not at all strange to pay her a visit because she was such an important part of his college life and have a great time, but it's another thing to go against everything it took to put her behind him in a romantic sense, and what he'd decided was best for him. A decision like this has to be deeper than 'damn she's a smokeshow,' even against the behest of our bored, locked out asses.

This is where I disagree. It is possible to be "over her," and after banging her be thrown right back into the same feelings. Like I said, try it.

I would if I could!

I wouldn't recommend that. When a decision like this goes against every building block you've used to get over her and put her behind you in the first place, what good is that decision in the end? Can you even trust that choice to begin with if you're just going to tear it down a few months later? If you can separate that from the choice to bang her to a point where you can go forward happily, I'll be the first to congratulate you. I just don't find the two decisions are mutually exclusive, and the latter one will tend to have an effect on the former, putting him back at square one and without sweet ass pics.

GL,



SEA WEISS OUT

Situations change. You get over her because she doesn't want to bang you. Then, when she does, welllll...

GL clearly had his eyes set on more than sex with FG, the point surrounding my whole argument. I don't think we're having this discussion if all he wanted was a night at the rodeo.

think Geddy's point is that it's more like:

Somewhere between "I declined" and in the middle of .gif responses I hurt a stomach laughing. So thanks guys Awesome stuff all around. Serious Dr Phil in .gif and one line form is actually quite effective. Geddy you got a big heart and twice the self awareness I had at that age so you got a good chance of being less than half as screwed up as me! Even if you really need to understand the post below and next time say "I accept" I've always been a sucker for freckles so go go go.

This is an amazing post. So much truth delivered with inspiration. Goofy you would/do make a great Dad. A++++ POY for me. **** the NHL.

You're my emo brother in here but I really disagree. My worst sexual experiences have all been a result of them being meaningless. This isn't to say I don't enjoy sex outside of monogamous relationships - I certainly do - but it's on my terms and it satisfies an established objective. So I dispute the claim that it would've been great when I'm clearly not into her anymore. I mean, I'm interested in every girl I hook up with to a varying degree; to essentially bang a girl out of spite, or just 'cause, well it just isn't in my playbook...and when I've tried to call that audible, it's been awful.

I extol her best virtues itt but there's a dark side of her I haven't really discussed either. She can be very selfish and remarkably insensitive to others left in her wake. She looks out for #1 and can be incredibly impersonal. Basically, she's uncompromising in her desire to do things on her terms and her terms alone. I still think the positives outweighed the negatives but she was far from an angel. As a friend, it was tolerable. As a friend who was falling for her, it was frustrating. As a hopelessly lovesick fool, it was devastating.

I highly doubt I was going to fall for her all over again if we ended up in bed together. I can be sappy but I'm realistic - she's leaving for good and there's nothing more to it than that. I just think the biggest issue was that if she had her way, she wins. Basically, it would've been vindication for her that no matter what, no matter how I was treated, she could still pull me in and get what she wants.

This is the most appropriate analogy I can think of: She initiated a lockout and assumed I'd be back when the new CBA got signed, because she's never had a reason to believe otherwise. But instead of running back to her when the doors opened again, I decided to take my entertainment dollar elsewhere.

Too soon? Sorry brah.

btw, can we give this post more love please?

There have been a ton of lol-inducing posts tonight but this one is so ****ing money...bolded section is just perfectly timed in this post. A+

Everlastrr - thanks, I hope to get the chance someday!

I guess this is where the bad history comes in, cause I think if you truly don't care, then whether she "wins" or "loses" is irrelevant to you. Like, stage 1 of actually being over someone is when you go super out of your way to make gestures to that person that they aren't important to you, stage 2 is where you're acting normal generally but still harbor a little resentment, and stage 3 is where you're truly no longer concerned with them. The above paragraph doesn't sound like stage 3.

hate/spite non-**** itt.

Angry pirate was your best play.

My casual hookups don't involve girls who I've had to stop thinking about via staged process. And I think that's what I'm getting at - you won't find me sleeping with a girl who made me go through the steps to get to stage 3. Just not happening.

My best friend right now is in a serious relationship a girl who dumped him last year before she took a trip in the summer through Europe (for reasons that should be fairly obvious). They had been friends throughout university, had liked each other at different points but never usually at the same time, and then finally started to date in our final year, only for it to last all of 4 months. And the way she did it was cold; she started cancelling all kinds of dates, she'd back out of things at the last possible second with zero explanation, she stopped paying attention to him at all...and then one day, she called him up and ended it. He was crushed. "Can't believe that bitch did this to me, **** her, that's the end of our friendship, period." I felt so bad for him.

After her fun had ended, she more or less came crawling back to him. Said she felt awful about what she did to him, said she was 100% in the wrong and that she just wanted one more chance. I told him emphatically it was a mistake. He didn't listen. Now they're about 6 months into round 2. He's happy (which is the only important thing for me, I guess) but I just can't believe he could change his mind so easily after being so distraught.

We had a big fight over it, because a couple months in, he asked me what my problem was and I flat out told him I can't stand her, which he took serious offense to. I reminded him of all the things he said about her over the summer and he told me people change, it's better now, she won't make the same mistakes and neither will he blah blah blah. And as I continued to prod, he threw this out as his big pipebomb: "Oh yeah? I guarantee you if [Flyers Girl] showed up tomorrow and threw herself at you, there's no way you could resist. You'd be all over that."

I told him that night that my honest answer would be no. I stuck to my guns. I'm proud.

**** her and dont date her

you should have told your m8 to grow a d1ck. maybe that would help instead of him acting like a pussy.

More than 20 years ago I went through something very similar to Geddy - Followed a girl around like a puppy for a year. Was only put out of my misery when she moved out of town. 6 months later she was back and called me up. In the meantime, I'd gotten over her and started a real relationship which made the decision to turn her down easy.

All these years later I still feel like this:



And so should Geddy.

Self-respect is a powerful drug.

I'm joining this thread very late, so sorry if this has already been asked:

NHL fans, how many of you are actually missing the game right now? Because I'm not. I'm Canadian (lol), so that should help set the table for what hockey used to me to me. But frankly this time around I don't care. I don't check for updates on the lockout, and when they do come back, I don't know what they're going to have to do to win me back. It's going to have to be substantial though. I don't think either side has accurately capped just how damaging this lockout is going to be to their product.

Gedddddddyyyyyyy

Um ya u had a chance to drill the fantasy with the backup of no disappointing non relationship bc she was leaving the next day out of your life.

You basically spite non-****ed her which is ok but if that was the aim, to not give her validation on her terms like you claim, you shouldn't have gone there in the first place.

IMO

Yeah seriously. What a waste.

So you just run around with her all night to have the vindictive non-****? Why waste your time? Just to get back at her? To prove something to yourself or to your friend who said you couldn't do it? Yawn.

Or maybe you're afraid to sex her up because of your own emotions and issues involved. That's reasonable. But say that's why you didn't want to do that. Don't say it was because you don't care...but that also preventing her from getting a "win" was also important to you at the same time.