Those desperate hours: Questions and Answers is best explained by an example:

You are tired of whacking of to porn on Saturday night and feel the urgent need for another way to release your manly pleasure probe, but you lack funds and prospects. So the desperate hours are upon you and your choice becomes a brute force one – Crack Whore or Meth Whore? I think this adequately explains the premise and usefulness of this thread. Obviously desperate hours question lurk everywhere and are particular poignant throughout weekend binges or even normal working hours.

So to begin this thread with Question Uno, given the above: is it Crack Whore or Meth Whore. We are obviously talking streetwalkers of course. You are ****ing desperate.

What say you?

Once this is fleshed out, I’m sure many more desperate hours questions lurk in the woodwork. Pile them on.

Crack whore over meth whore; crack whores less likely to be IV drug users I think.

Meth whore (lack of teeth)

Meth whore is clearly correct. Same exact effects as ADHD meds, and who doesn't want a focussed worker bee?

Crack whore this isn't even a question. Sounds kind of misanthropic.

Sweet crack whore inya face

Meth whores better at running the numbers.

Sorry, was thinking math not meth

* maths

Why not moth whores?

They still have streetwalkers?

You need to get out of the house more, and explore.

I haven't seen a "streetwalker" (except Vegas) since 2007. Prostitutes whore from online now.

Yes. Yes they do.

The correct answer is neither but gun to my head, I'm going crack whore 100% of the time.

Meth mouth is a real thing. A condom would probably dissolve in that ****.

Both are just as likely to be toothless. So that's a wash. They will both try to rob you. So that's a wash. But I feel like a meth whore is more likely to completely lose it and bite your dick off. Your run of the mill crack whore has a lower "bite your dick off" frequency.

Finally an expert enters the fray!

You're on your deathbed w/ a short while to go when the Angel of Mercy arrives and offers to grant a last request before the voyage. You'd really, really like some beer.

You are given the choice: One Bass Ale or a 6-pack of Bud Lite. Which do you choose and why?

Since all ales suck, Bud Lite. Dilly, dilly.

Bass. BL is just flavored water, not beer.

I would have said meth whore until reading Villian's take. Guess I'm a crackwhore and Bass ale man.

I’m thinking about Wendy in Breaking Bad. If the hour were truly desperate, she’d be all right. Meth for me.

Bud light: six beers overwhelms one, even given the quality differential.

Good lord, guzzing a six pack of bud light on your deathbed. Howard manages to come up with something more dedraved then what zeno could come up with. I'd rather OD on bathsalts in a Taco Bell bathroom tbh.

In defense of Howard, his plan could be (or should be) to get the cute nurse with big tits to guzzle a few Bud Lite beers with him and perhaps at least get one last feel up or boobs rubbed in his face before expiring. And etc...…….

Here is a new desperate hours scenario, based somewhat on actually events that happen all the time. (And if you don't believe me just google it)

The set up is that you live with a very old relative/parent that is on Social Security and this supplies you with your only income, as you have no job and are basically just a leech and a loser and a boozer. This probably describes 75% of OOT posters. Anyway, and being careful here to not over step the bounds of good taste and 2+2 rules, the said old decrepit relative dies of Natural Causes, say a heart attack or stroke. But the desperate hours are now upon you and you simply must have that monthly income to survive. So you don’t report the death to keep getting the checks, fraud against the government being completely justified. Say that part is set.

Now comes the hard, desperate part; where are you going to hide the body? This is very important. You can’t just stuff it under the trailer you live in because the neighborhood dogs will sniff it out and drag the body into the street and chew the face off. And a whole plethora of other possibilities are also obvious but too detailed to explore fully. But the answer I’m seeking is simple; where to hide the body for the longest period of time to keep getting that Social Security Check coming in that supplies your booze, your condoms, and your drug habit(s).

You need to really think this one through to get the proper answer. I’m a bit stymied to be honest. I have a few ideas but I’m concerned they may not be the best.


What say you?

Mr. Wu's pigs.

Corpus delicti.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Haigh

Zeno, I assume that I am a lazy leech, in which case minimization of effort is key.

More information is needed, however. What relevant metrics does the recently deceased have? Weight and height should be sufficient. What climate do I live in? What time of year is it? Do I have a well-stocked shed or was this relative the sort of slothful person who had no tools? In what year was the abode that I find myself and the unfortunate relative built?