Lab,

Your post is prob better suited for the lc thread. This doesn't feel like an appropriate place to discuss drinking plans of someone who doesn't have any issues with alcohol.

My drinking is pretty similar I think. I have no problem not drinking for extended periods. But if I buy a bottle of wine tonight I'll drink the whole thing tonight. And probably think dammit why didn't I buy a 1.5 L, is the liquor store still open. If I buy a 1.5 L bottle of wine tonight I'll drink the whole thing. If I buy a 4 L jug of Carlo Rossi tonight (stfu CR is awesome) I will drink every day and it will be gone by Sunday night. Do I have a problem? Eh I don't know, I don't NOT have a problem.

Hi guys, how are you feeling at the weekend?

A week without is closing in. I'd say my earlier controlling was a way to avoid a disaster, so it was in no way a total failure. I have, as said earlier, for example for a very long time not had any alcohol in the house at the weekends, with too much time for potential drinking. So the result has been me starting to think at sunday it will be nice to have a drink at monday, it's kind of a reflex, just happened.

But somehow it's nice to have a brain that functions somehow optimally again. Recommended, if you can stand it

So this was my first monday in a very long time without alcohol. Nice but a bit harsh experience. Like the crave was a notch more prominent from time to time. Time anyway to get away from the habit/addiction. Now it feels a bit odd I ever wanted to get drunk.

So this was the first week. Interesting to see how things develop. Hoping for a first month, first year, first decade...

Good luck plaaynde! Well done so far.

Nice to hear!

Think getting an old-new hobby simultaneously was and will be essential. It may get you through the hard times that somehow will lay ahead, probably when least expected, just when you think you'll be alright...

Think I will re-start reading up on my vast whisky literature today (most are as e-books, but have about three nice comprehensive paper ones). Smart move? I think it could be, as paradoxical as it sounds. Then I could go into a REAL connoisseur mode, and MAYBE have it at sundays in restaurants, in extremely small amounts. It could also be a hobby on a purely theoretical basis, a bit like you can have astronomy as a hobby without doing actual observing yourself. The latter I have taken up, as mentioned earlier.

Dude, if you're happy that you're clean like you said you are (and looking for a decade clean), then this whiskey connoisseur BS is just your addictive voice trying to bull**** you into picking up the bottle again, imo. As a scotch drinker, none of the stuff you posted is particularly worthy of acclaim. If you're truly a connoisseur and not a problem drinker, then give yourself 6 months dry and reevaluate. What would be the harm?

Agreed. I'm big into wine and craft beer. If I end up quit for good then I'll have to find something else to get interested in. No hobby is indispensable, except maybe masturbation.

Ha ha. Good points. I have "quitted" totally only once before, and then lasted for three weeks. So the minimum before even taking a drop will have to be at least breaking that record, that is one month. I'd rather make it two for getting some margin. 6-12 months feels a bit like an overkill right now. I'm talking 20+20 milliliters a week. Seriously.

Things change fast. Now I'm planning to celebrate my upcoming two weeks of abstinence - with a drink! That is the 2 x 20 milliliters of single malt at sunday at a whisky restaurant I mentioned earlier.

The reason is that my refraining from alcohol is practical, not ideological. We already know I'm an addict, and will remain so. If I'm waiting the whole week for having that utterly tiny amount, so be it. I think this can hold me from making the decision of buying a bottle, which would be detrimental for the project.

Excuse me, but you don't have it all figured out at once, so you need to listen to yourself for helping you guide yourself in the direction you've chosen. I will of course note if the craving increases from that tiny amount, and take necessary action...but my guess right now is I can benefit from saving my whisky hobby, keeping it in strong check. Sounds a bit questionable, but think I need to check it out.

I'm guessing that with problem drinkers things do change fast, but "celebrating" abstinence with a drink seems really odd, particularly since it's premeditated days in advance. Sounds like more of a "reward" than a celebration, but let's be honest - it's neither.


What direction is your chosen direction, the staying clean for decades direction or the taming the beast direction?


At your peak, what was the most whisky your were drinking (e.g., daily or weekly)? What benefit do you get from your whisky hobby when all you talk about is how to control it?

All right, one month sober. Feels good man.

I quit for five months last year, then went back to drinking for the last three. If you've quit for a length of time before, but failed, I can say that for me at least the second try has been a lot easier. Sobriety is not about launching yourself into the scary unknown after the first run. I established a non-drinking mode on the first go-round, and I knew what it entailed, and I knew that I could live with it and come to enjoy aspects of it.

I've filled the old drinking time slots with writing projects, studying and playing better poker, exercising, and taking positive steps towards fulfilling my goals for the future, while still having plenty of time for video games and ****posting.

If you've tried and failed before, set a date and get ready to switch modes. You've done it before. It's probably going to be easier to do it this time.

I've chosen to more or less get rid of the ****. The journey contains a bit of improvisation, for maximizing the chance of success.

Don't have the exact numbers, had at "best" about 20 bottles of single malt etc in the shelf. A rough estimation is I was up to a consumption of 1.5 bottles a week when peaking. Deduced it from how much I bought and how fast it dwindled. On the other hand I once drank a whole bottle in 24 hours without really getting drunk. That was one of the triggers to not drink during weekends: it was of no use and potentially detrimental to health.

When it comes to my whisky hobby I'm prepared to give it one more chance before ditching it. But then it just has to be in whisky bars, in extremely small amounts. Buying miniatures doesn't work anymore, I've had enough of the few available in my local store. And I can't have any bigger bottles stored in the house, so there you go!

As a friend of basic math I estimated earlier I'm giving myself a 40% chance to save my whisky hobby. That's not very far from a coinflip, and worth checking out!

its a balancing act...but when i look at my life i am a binge guy..i binge on cookies, the sopranos, the man in the high castle, recently i have been a BINGE READER.. and the eff of it all is that all authors seem to be drunks, or at least the ones i like FU BUKOWSKI..

like this dutch detective harry hole... he has great inner dialog, and now hes on heroin...does it end..i think there has to be a way to fight your uinner thirsty demon...under the volcano..THERES A BOOK FOR YOU... it is the perfect description of the downward spiral...then he talks about demons...naming them..i then put the book down,,theres some tuff i do not want to know.... i played rugby for 20 years ....in the front row..i can handle it...what workd best for me is not drinking alone...at home..thats when it gets sad and thats when the real dangerous thoughts can come at you in the middle of the night...life sure is fun with an addictive personality.... my mayan buddy says he can see demons over my shoulder when i am drinking...my question is ...are they bad because they are demons...what if they are guardian angels in disguise...distilled SPIRITS... is that a clue hidden in plain sight...sorry for the wandering topic, just found this thread...

plaaynde,

I've said it before, but it bears repeating: your story, approach, ideas, and plan are all things I have experienced personally, heard from other people in recovery, and read about. I completely understand the need to try it your way, believe me I do. If my way hadn't stopped working I would still be trying it. If and when you ever get to that point, I and many others like me found a solution, and it is there for you too, if you want it.

goat lover,

Ditto. Read the thread and see if there are stories to which you relate. I'm pretty sure I made a Bukowski reference when I was circling the drain.

And yes, I think they're called spirits for a reason.

LFS

I agree. The first time I just thought after three weeks: why? Now I can see why. Don't think the on-off thing would be satisfactory for me, need more stability. So it may be practically zero in the end, if not exactly zero. Honestly don't know the answer to that "fine tuning" question. Gonna find out. Maybe already next sunday.

Thanks, comfortable to know!

Have a free day, and was about to make "sunday" a bit earlier, was on my way to the restaurant, but then felt it was not worth it, turned around and went to the grocery store instead.

Close call.

I've been good for the last couple of months (pretty much a record recently), and have been feeling great in my self, but now have been feeling increasing agitated/craving.

I don't really don't like AA meetings (I've been to lots), but think I'll give it another go tonight. Honestly I'm scared to out. Taking my card, or some loose cash, is easy and not a clever move.

can anyone help me out with a question regarding the possible side effects/withdrawal from quitting alcohol?

I quit drinking on new year's eve. Prior to that i've had about 4 beers at night (mixed in with the rare occasional bottle of wine or a few hard drinks) every day since the beginning of August, so it was approx 5 months straight. And prior to that, I stopped from last Thanksgiving so that prior stoppage lasted 10 months.

I actually stopped to get back in shape, which was my motivator. About a week after quitting, I started waking up in the middle of the night from a nightmare that turned into a panic attack, and not being able to lie down in bed again for hours, even if I tried. I looked it up, and it's called a Nocturnal panic Attack. Basically during one I feel the worst anxiety ever imaginable, sometimes not even able to sit down, except walking around my house until it eases down. My doc prescribed ativan which helps, but they take a couple hours to kick in.

So in the beginning, those episodes happened maybe once or twice a week, and I'm always 100% fine during the day. Lately it's been a disaster, happening almost every night, so I pop an ativan before bed which helps but when I try to go off of it after a few days, it happens again.

So basically I drank every day for about 5 months then quit abruptly, but usually no more than 4 IPA beers per night. Could this be causing the nighttime anxiety? It's been so bad lately that I'm almost afraid to go to bed, as dumb as that might sound. And if it is withdrawal how long will it last?

thanks!

That sounds terrible. Drinking a lot messes with your REM, which can mean you get extremely vivid dreams for a short while after you quit.

IMAD but what you have sounds different to this, especially if it goes on a long while. Maybe see a specialist if is continues. Hope it works out!

That does not sound like alcohol withdrawal, but, like you said, nocturnal panic attacks. The onset of these attacks may have been a result of physical or psychological changes related to quitting drinking, but alcohol withdrawal is probably not causing the continued panic attacks.

It sounds like you've developed panic disorder--i.e. not just isolated panic attacks, but recurring panic attacks along with persistent fear of having future attacks. While a benzo like ativan can help with the symptoms, the most effective treatment is cognitive behavioral treatment, which has a high success rate with panic disorder. CBT will help you manage the symptoms and make future attacks less likely, and it's a brief type of therapy that can help after 1-2 session.

Ativan can be great if you have a panic attack every once in a while, but if you use it daily, it's easy to become physically dependent on it, which is not good if you already have addiction issues, and it can lose effectiveness and require larger doses as you develop tolerance. And, as you've found, once you stop taking it, the attacks return.

Feel I will not go through this ****ing withdrawal process once again. This has to be it, if just continuing I'll learn to live without alcohol more and more. Will keep that connoisseur option open though for psychological reasons, somehow eases the pressure.