Quote:
Originally Posted by Shuffle
I pretty much stopped drinking for several months but relapsed when I broke my fingers and couldn't use my hand from early-May to mid-June. Not as bad as before but I still don't want to drink every night because I want that edge and I want to be productive. My splint and bandages and everything are off now, fingers are stiff, need three months of rehab, but at least I can use my hand and other fingers again. So I'm trying to get back to sober now.
615 was an important day for me, something with meaning, so I decided to start sober again on that day. It was also the day CA opened everything up again. Tonight it's only been a couple days sober. I walked over to the bar down the street to grab dinner around 9:30 p.m. Everyone around me was drinking and singing, playing music, having a good time. I was being a polite but unfriendly loner, someone who was just there to listen to the din of the atmosphere and not hear the quiet sounds of the night. I thought for sure I was going to order a drink or two, after I ordered a water to start, or when they brought out my salad, or when they brought out my dinner, or when I was eating, or when the bartender asked me if I wanted to order a drink. But I didn't, and around the time there were only a few more bites left on my plate, I knew I was good. Just don't blow it and do something stupid.
And I didn't. No drinks. Tomorrow, will be three days sober. Normally I'm not the pat myself on the back kinda guy (especially after only 2-3 days) but tonight was a good night. I gave people the look of death on my way out the door. Don't **** with me. I'm not going to screw around again.
That's a big step, but perhaps visiting bars even for food when you are trying to remain sober is not a good idea?
You need to disassociate yourself from the life you previously lived. Not to be preachy, but it's like a gambler quitting, and then rocking up at the Casino for dinner. Too many temptations.
As for the people laughing and having a good time. Are they really though?
As for me, I'm having real cravings for alcohol this evening. I will never touch it again, and I knew this would happen, but just gotta ignore and keep busy.