having previously sent 0 messages in my first 3 months on OKC. I went on a message binge of 20 messages, while in a rather foggy mental state. The messages were all like, "Nice profile and pictures!" or "Daayum, girl you got it going on!". I got one response, from a girl who is wheelchair bound though quite cute. No other responses. I guess I'll either have to make a play at wheelchair girl, or try my luck again.

yeah, those messages are really awful next. that's what girls always get so they aren't going to look at them.

yeah... It's interesting though, I'm making a more serious attempt at doing this and I'm starting to understand the match-making process slightly better at least from my perspective, (I have no idea how females make decisions) basically it's a filtration process that works in stages, the main goal is to filter out people which would be a waste of time for you due to lack of attraction/compatibility:
1. photos - there is no need to read anything if you aren't physically attracted to the person

2. Looking for things that are just totally incompatible, for instance if they say, they need a tall dude w/ black hair, and you are short w/ blonde hair you might as well move on. Or if they say they need a liberal democrat, and you are a republican move on

3. Filtering for more subtle personal differences. These are very important as well, and there are a million small things that can make the difference between wasting your time, and finding someone who might work for you. This is why it's important to carefully read the profiles and get a good idea of who you are dealing with.

it's not easy but it's important to remember that there are like a billion women out there, and if you keep working at it, you may find success

You kind of got it right. #1 is obvious, but #2 and #3 should really only take place after you've actually received a response. Like you said there are tons of girls out there, so message a bunch based on criteria #1 then worry about the others if you actually get a response.

I guess just avoid telling her about the people you've met. No need to spiral into an ex-okcupid date conversation. And try not to focus on this topic because it seems counterproductive to meeting.

~*swoons*~
Oh, Movieman

Don't actually send that quote tho unless you've been talking a while. I'm just getting ahead of myself with excitement.

Don't do this ever. If someone asks you questions about your time on online dating, answer as briefly as possible and smoothly change the topic when you can

Reading comprehension? She never asked him about his time in online dating, so why even bring it up is what I'm saying. Think prevention, as in do not divert the conversation into that direction if possible by avoiding that line of conversation.

If she brings it up, oh well, but no need to volunteer any of it.

As in, exactly the opposite of what ATF habitually does.

I was agreeing with you, just taking it a step further by saying never steer the convo in that direction with anyone

i think if youre on a date and she brings it up (online dating experiences) there's no harm in talking about it. it also helps if you have a couple fun stories you can go to. but yeah, id never bring it up over messages

i went a little more high risk, and sent her a link to a comedy bit i did and said, this is so you know im a real person, and if you think im a funny person too, we'll meet up. she hasn't read the message/signed on since i sent it last night, so fingers crossed

Bold

Oh god yes!


"Did u tell them I saw your goods and contemplated giving you a bj? Lol I'm sure they looooved that and I thought u didn't know how to post a pic!!"


"Ur so lucky I can't remember the name of ur poker site..."

I was gonna say, after writing his trip report ATF doesn't seem too bothered that the girl supposedly knows the site url and can follow the thread. How convenient that she forgot it!

Dude before she wrote that I was seriously considering requesting that my handle and all posts be wiped. Still, if she knows how to use google, with a little memory she should be able to find it if she wants to.

She seems really laided back though, so it might not faze her? We talked about AH and her dominatrix gig and how AH wants to do a 3some. IIRC, she said she could get into bondage and maybe a 3some.

lol

stop talking to women about other women

It's female dependent, bro. This woman's second message to me asked me about funny OKC date stories. She knows AH is pretty much a friend who I'm helping out though she did say she thinks AH wants to **** me.

I've found that every woman is fascinated when I tell them I "blog" about my online dating. Since I almost always reveal it out on the date, they can't help but begin to wonder what I'm going to write about them and our date.

Pretty good overall rule.

and how has that been working out for you, except for, you know, sloppy handjobs and teenager makeout sessions at the back of the car?

What entertains/frustrates me the most about ATF is his apparent conviction that the 'results' he's getting validate his methods

Decently. My approach shifted after CL revealed that, to maintain my interest, she felt "pressured" into ****ing me on our first date. That made me feel gross as I don't want to be that guy. It changed my approach. However, over time, I've come to realize that "feeling pressured" is her problem and changing my approach was a mistake. As such, I'm back to attempting to ****-close my dates. I lost sight of the fact that being charming, sweet and amazing but also a serious sexual threat is a pantie-dropping approach. DTMAS, last night, said she felt pressured to bang and now I think she's into me. Basically I've come to realize that I must always be a man-whore however still make it known that I'm ultimately seeking a relationship.

Yeah yeah... at the end of the day I've made a few amazing friends who happen to be female and really attractive. Having attractive female friends, once I move over from placeholder status to "friend," is long term positive for my dating IMO. As an aside, I just got off the horn with AH and we agreed that we would hook-up for a 3way. It's going to be reciprocated... FMF first and then MFM.

Cliffs on this ATF bozo?

lol

Married for a long time. Divorced(?), got into the dating game and proceeds to either cause people itt to believe he's a troll or someone who has eye rolling methods to his version of "dating"

Alcoholic who alternates between acknowledging he shouldn't be drinking and defending himself because he's not a real alcoholic.

Bizarre interactions with women who are somehow more bizarre than he is.

Complete utter noise, not worth wasting more than an eyeroll.