I like all of the pics except the subway one. You are definitely my type as far as looks go. Of course, I've never had any success whatsoever with that type, but just for plain attractiveness that is what I go for (Patrick Dempsey/Adam Sandler/Jersey/NY).

"For long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex..." Ur, maybe drop the casual sex.

"If you want to meet up for coffee/drinks. I'm not one for making idle chat on this site, I'd rather cut straight to the date." Why?

"So as long as you look good, I'm going to be open to the possibility that I might end up liking you." Not digging this. I mean, gosh, even if I was in your age range, single and everything you liked, you would just automatically dismiss me because I had cancer and had to have a mastectomy

Thx for the help. It was all done on an iPad and I am terrible at typing on it and I rarely proof read it. Just me being lazy so got no complaints about being scolded for the grammar and tbh I'm not very good with my grammar. Maths, history and physics were my strong subjects.

I mentioned Florida because I messaged some girls in Tampa because I'm out here getting rid of the last of my psoriasis plaques (no luck with my arthritis though ) and it might look odd that I'm from London. I can certainly see why it doesn't look good. I will get rid of it. Not sure if I should be honest about going back to school due to having to change my career path because of the arthritis. Kinda feel like it might put some ppl off.

I'm guessing the sarcasm does not come off too well with the pic captions.

Anyway once again thx for the help and to anyone else who has helped.

For some reason I was envisioning something from Braveheart. I'm also having a very difficult time evaluating your profile since I'm not sure what type of women you're trying to target.
This is good advice. Being in a setting with a diverse group will make you more approachable to people outside of your race. Maybe photoshop some white people sitting next to you in that last pic
Have you noticed anything different now that you're in the yellow? I guess this would help if you're the one initiating the contact, but I was always hesitant to contact anyone that wasn't green

Just a few odd things I noticed:
-Drugs - Sometimes: ??????
-In the similar users section section, with the exception of one guy who is more desiring of sex than you, everyone else is more adventurous.
-Casual sex - you're bold. I always laugh when I see this
-New Jersey? Now I'm almost positive you went to Duke

I don't have any problem with atheists, actually. I didn't even know the "laughing about it" was a choice at first until I saw other profiles with the same thing just now. I thought the poster put in there manually. Now that I've seen it again, I have no real trouble with it. But yes, I believe in God. That had nothing to do with it, however, it just struck me as demeaning when I first read it, like the poster was saying, "Atheist and I laugh at everyone who isn't." I think the misinterpretation is on my side.

Btw, thanks everyone for the PM's and stuff. I never thought so many guys would be interested in my opinion. I'm still finishing some of them.

FWIW, I agree with JellyKing's posts. We obviously think the same way.

Sounds like she's just fishing for emails to sell.

Yeah, it's more supposed to be "athiest, but I don't take it very seriously and am not likely to try to convert you."

Thanks.

I am a quiet, reserved, soft spoken person. Most of the chicks I've dated since being in Tampa have been low income chicks who don't have much going for them. Guess I just come off as a mark.

It's the same for this guy as well (and he looks like a lot of fun), so maybe it's standard for guys to exaggerate on the questions? I've been casually dating one guy I met on OKC and his answers made him sound like an animal in bed. It was the most boring wtf sex ever though.

Thanks!

I felt like being honest, I feel like everybody knows that guys who don't say that are kinda FOS.

I feel like that will cause me to engage a bunch of trolls/attention whores that waste my time. Also personal meetups feel more natural than online chatting to me.

Maybe that's offputting to an extent. Girls have complimented that part of my profile for its honesty though, and I do feel like any girl that I message would probably feel complimented lookswise by virtue that I'm messaging her.

I haven't been yellow for long I don't think. That's weird, I feel most comfortable contacting girls in red. I assume girls that are green are likely trolls. Guess your perspective is the opposite.

-I smoke a lot of weed.
-Yeah, I only answered the safe questions bc I didn't feel like wasting mental energy choosing the most +EV ones on subjects where I felt I may be judged.
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-Ha, I went to Duke but NJ isn't my first choice. Planning on g'ing tfo and moving to NY soon.

Why? I'd love to live in Fort Lee. It's more suburban than NYC which I prefer, and so close to home. (I'm from Harlem)

Fort Lee is boring like ****

There's so much more to do in Manhattan but it's so much more effort to get there than I'd like (esp downtown which is imo the best part of the city). Especially when it's cold during the winter it's difficult to consistently go into the city and be social. Even during the summer I normally just go during weekends.

It's also a pain in the ass to get from NYC > Fort Lee after like 11 PM. I normally have to take like a $60 cab back.

Oh, I didn't know PATH stopped running.

I don't think the path train runs to Fort Lee.

o how long have you been in Tampa? Are you enjoying USF?

23% Enemy 61% Friend 57% Match Sent to

Jan 4, 2013 – 8:26pm
I've been here for a year and half nd yes I love it. how about youSent from the OkCupid app
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Jan 4, 2013 – 8:35pm
I've been here a year. I like it too but I wouldn't say love it.

It's very different from NY but I make the most of it. Where did you move from?

Jan 4, 2013 – 8:40pm
I love usf not tampa lol and I moved from maineSent from the OkCupid app
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Jan 4, 2013 – 8:48pm
Sorry, reading comprehension check lol.

That makes a lot more sense. Tampa is...... But, no matter where I'm at, I'm going to have a good time.

My name's Seymour

Jan 5, 2013 – 3:36am
Name is monique and its alot different than the north. But ya I'm trying to make the most of itSent from the OkCupid app
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Jan 5, 2013 – 12:21pm
Where have you been in Tampa? I've actually had more fun in the Clearwater-St Pete area. Clearwater has amazing beaches and views, and downtown St Pete is much better than Ybor

Jan 5, 2013 – 1:00pm
Yea clearwater is beautiful, but I usually hit local spots around usf. ybor got old quick


So I'm really liking this girl, looks wise. And she's black, but clearly not the standard black chick from Tampa. How can I steer this from idle chit chat about Tampa sightseeing and nightlife and into getting a personal meet up?

"You seem cool, let's meet up for a date. What's your number"

I never use question marks bc eschewing them makes me feel more MANLY

23% enemy is pretty high, have you checked why she's that high? Might not want to waste your time if she answers the question about the right time for sex being "Only after the wedding"

OK, since there are actually women in thread now, I've made my profile visible to non-OKC members. I've probably close it off again in a day or so, but here it is:

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/NickMPK

I really like pic #2. The genie pic isn't necessary. Prague pic is beeewtiful. Pinecone pic, great.

I'd take out the part about German board games (saying you love board games in general is fine, but the rest is difficult for non-specialists to understand, imo).

The political stuff doesn't need to be so in-depth. Maybe it's enough just to say you're are a demo?

I'm sorry you have to live in that STL cesspool, but at least you're at Wash U.

For whatever reason your profile makes you sound boring. Maybe spice up the poker stuff a bit. You won a circuit event, may as well flaunt it:

"Being good at the 'maths' helped me crush my AC opponents to a win that I'm really thankful for. While I don't play much poker anymore, this was a big confidence builder for me!"

Well, I'm pretty boring, I guess. But this was the best I could come up with on the fly.

Well yeah, she's a college student. I hope you didn't lie about your educational background, because it's not going to end well if you did.
I think pics 2, 3, or 5 would be better for your main pic. It'll entice more women to look at your profile. It really doesn't matter if it's a little outdated since you've specified which pic is the most recent.

It's probably best if you add a little anonymity to your profile, especially since you're a professor. I'd keep the names of your schools out of it. If she's curious she'll ask, and it will give you something more to talk about. Referencing Princeton and grad school many times makes you come off as bit arrogant. The heavy emphasis on schooling will give women the impression that you have no life outside of your university. You should probably just confine it to the "What I'm doing with my life" section.

Nerd has a negative connotation (very unsexy). Maybe replace it with enthusiast? Women will be able to pick up on your vibe based on what's written.

6 things - commentary is unnecessary. hard to skim when it's bulky

Exclamation points look weird on longer sentences.

lol @ poker chip tricks and "you should message me if" deja vu

Your profile is appealing to asexual nerds, not females. The only way to redeem yourself is to post shirtless pics. Seriously though, condense your profile, generalize more, and add stuff that will make a female want to be in your life. If you can cook, definitely put that in and say you can make the best hotdog or whatever you've ever eaten. Just give the highlights and let ask more about them if she's interested.

Sorry if I come off as too critical. You had a lot written, therefore more to comment on.

I'll probably toggle between pics 1 and 2 as my main pic, since this seems to generate visibility. I've put them both up many times on "My Best Face" and they score the same. Pic 2 is definitely a higher quality photo, but Pic 1 is much more recent. Pics of me with the beard always score higher than without FWIW.

I've been on the fence about the Indian wedding pic. I look pretty goofy, but it's also my only pic that looks really fun/social, right?

I feel like the advice to play down the politics and play up the poker seems like something that only someone on this board would recommend. Maybe 1% of girls will know what the WSOP Circuit is, and the majority won't even understand what a poker tournament is.

When I switched to pic 1 last week, I got a lot more profile views, but I think that's mostly just how the site works. As I mentioned before, my pics with facial hair definitely score higher on "My Best Face" than those without for whatever reason.

I'm not really concerned with anonymity....it's not like I'm embarrassed to have an online profile or that it is against University policy. And I don't think I include anything in my profile that I should be embarrassed about if my employer knew about it.

I don't want to come off as arrogant and didn't realize I seemed to have too much emphasis on schooling. e.g. I went to Harvard, and don't mention it at all. Maybe I could replace most of the mentions of "Princeton" with "New Jersey"?

This is the first time I've heard anyone suggest that someone should "generalize more" in their profile. Almost every time I read someone's else's profile, I feel like "wow, this person seems like everyone else's profile I've read."

I can't really cook. I feel like the music stuff should make me seem less nerdy, but I don't really know how to communicate that.

Jelly, I did lie. Never been to college. My plan if any girl inquires about it is to say I completed X number of credits at a college in the NYC area, and have been considering going to a FL college to finish my degree.

It just seems a little too much. This is something I'd rather find out when I do go on a date

The only thing they need to know is that you went to college/grad school and that can be seen in your details section. It's a thing of the past and should only be brought up if it's what you're doing right now. Instead of "friends in Princeton" just leave it at friends. No one really cares for that much detail and it looks peculiar when it's there.


It's only because there's so much detail. Like Felicia said, saying you like board games is better than specifying the esoteric games you enjoy. Most people won't read through a massively long profile. I mainly skim for red flags, but that's very difficult to do if a profile is too bulky, so I wouldn't even bother. There's not much room to ask questions, because you've answered them all in great details. For the most part just specify the topics your interested in. This makes it easier for someone to see if you have anything in common. We're only going to care about what interest us, so anything else is a boring read if it's long.

Well good, the hotdog line is perfect. You could even talk about your ramen boiling skills. It'll lighten the mood. The music is comparatively only a small portion, and would probably go unnoticed because of the length of everything else.

Take note of Dean's profile. It's concise and easy to read. This is a desirable length for a profile. You could double his word count and still be ok, but no more than that. Women don't care about how specific your profile is. It's all about the pics. The profile is there to screen for certain things and help you out on the conversation

I took out 2/3 of the mentions of Princeton, and got rid of most comments on "six things".

There are several places where I'm trying to lighten the mood....that why I say I'm good at "poker chip tricks" rather than poker, why I include the Indian Wedding/pine cone pics, or mention Josie & The Pussycats or Sifl & Olly in my "favorite things". I don't understand the hot dog line because anyone could say that...it's just seems like an empty statement, like how every girls says they "love to laugh".

TheDean's profile is easy to read, but I also feel like is says nothing about him. He will get attention just because he is a good looking guy. But when I see a girl's profile like his, I completely skip over it.

As I've discussed throughout the thread, I have a very good response rate, and get a lot of first dates with attractive and very accomplished women using this profile. I just don't get very many second dates. If anything, I am worried that I am more boring IRL than I sound in the profile.