ethics of talking to a 21 yr old as a 36 yr old?

I don't know. I just stopped caring. In the beginning it was really important to me to impress my date, regardless if I liked them or not. Now I just don't give a ****. If there's any friction to the process, I move on. It might be because I had the opportunity to sleep with one of the most physically attractive women I've ever known; the rest now seem very ordinary in comparison.

Ugh, kind of in an awkward spot (Or maybe I just messed it up a while ago). So went on two dates with this girl kind of far apart in May and June as she was pretty busy with work and having some friends visit. Dates went well, but no real physical escalation (one was beers and frisbee in the park, the second karaoke... both on weeknights when she had to work early the next day). I went back to the US for two weeks and when I came back chatted with her on OKC chat for about an hour. At the end I asked if she wanted to grab a drink to celebrate her work promotion, then she said that she was busy that week and then visiting her parents the next week. As we were saying goodbye she mentioned "sorry I'm busy the next few days, don't take it personally." Basically, at the time, I took the whole thing as a semi blow-off and was in the mode of not contacting her but being open to her maybe contacting me when she got back in town.

So that last contact was 2 months ago. Tonight at midnight got a text from her:
"my name I've been meaning to tell you: I stole your idea and invited my friends to karaoke to celbrate my birthday... they loved it! It was an awesome night. I've been meaning to tell you. Hope all is well. Can't believe summer is over . But my annual leave is coming up! her name"

Basically wondering if I should have tried contacting her a couple of weeks after the IM convo (obv now water on the bridge, but for future such circumstances). And what is the read on the random text message tonight? Was she always just waiting for me to contact her and just now got around to it? Seeing someone else and that faltered and now I'm a backup plan? I was kind of into this girl at the beginning (she is super cool, the only thing missing was a romantic spark) but I also have had some other things going on so not super desperate to go chasing.

Um, same ethics as talking to a 36 yr old as a 36 yr old.

TRIP REPORT 2:

I drove to meet up and I ventured into the same plan as before where I maid-knock surprise him with my arrival. I made my way to the front desk to find his room and grabbed an arm full of pillows, but it was too late. His shirtless form spotted me as I was gallivanting around the parking lot attaching my parking pass. #Busted
Nevertheless, he helped me carry my things inside and we embarked on our 4 day adventure!

Highlights:

He took me to Victoria's Secret to use my coupon, and then paid for it all. Auspicious coupon is on my side. Something about it being for my birthday, but not the one coming up, it was for the one I had a few months ago as a freeroll.

I make noises in my sleep and he calls them whimpers and responds by cuddling me in the night. He made sure to let me know that he's not a cuddler and to not expect this much cuddling, and that this is a one-time thing. 3 nights into it must mean it is a 3 night thing, but I'm not complaining.

He likes UFC and we went to a sports bar and watched while vying for different fighters with no argument. Mine won. Then we took it to the hotel's crappy wifi where there was almost 0 buffering action.

We laughed so much about so many things, I can't even remember a single incident

Lowlights:

I must've eaten too much while hanging out because at the end of the trip before bed he asked if we could talk. It was so built up I thought I was going to be told something terrible and just didn't even want to know.

He asked if I was bulimic because he couldn't reconcile my food intake vs my actual size. He mentioned a laundry list of reasons including my bathroom visits that he said were at "suspicious" times. I didn't know how to answer, so I just said I wasn't and that I have a high metabolism. It's the truth, that, and I have food intolerances to most carbs and my body doesn't absorb them. I bruise really easily and it shows after sexy times. I guess I pig out?

All of this made me feel bad about my body and felt like he was checking up on me, even if he did soften it by saying he'd help me through it. It didn't sit well, but it passed fairly quickly because we immediately booked my flight to see him again in 1.5 weeks soon after.

In the morning he drove my car to drop himself off at the airport and I gave him the most elite road head of his life. the end.


This was after we saw a pet monkey we wanted to pet, but it was aggro and we turned the corner to sit down.

Some of these girls are ****ing weird:

Responding to say she'll respond later. Ooookaaay.

you monster

solid TR Jenni

Whether or not you were at one time a backup plan (could be, could have been a lot of things) she's texting you now and seems like she wants to hang out. If you like the girl and want to see her, go see her. If you don't, don't. It's not like you're ever going to be a girl's first and only guy she's dating, so unless it's clear she's playing you for something, and you like her, just go out with her.

lolonline dating

Messaged up this girl (8/10) who loves college and nfl football/basketball, and mentioned this is her first year not doing fantasy football (she claims to love it). What is my response to this though?

Me: Hey Daniella, how was your labor day weekend? I see you're from Troy... That's a pretty nice area, I actually work out that way!

Similarly to you, I love college athletics, particularly college basketball. I've been playing all my life, and I really miss it.

Hopefully you aren't going to have any fantasy football withdrawals I am actually doing my draft on ESPN in 5 minutes (9pm), I'm getting the 5th pick in the draft.

Talk soon,
Ryan

Her: WAHHHHH!!!! I am sooooo jealous!!!!

hero?

ask her who you should pick

This is very weird. It's a strange thing to bring up, especially if you're not gonna be around each other regularly/kind of long distance-y dating? Maybe he knows someone (friend, relative, ex) who had a food disorder and is more sensitive to it?

Keep eating girl, you're doing fine

Pay: what movie said

ATF: you suck at communicating, or maybe just aren't very smart, or both

Jenni: a+ trip report. D- surprise execution.

What do you mean? Seriously.

Gave my number to 2 girls and cant figure out which one of them texted me. Name doesnt go with either screen name. I invited one to coffee and one to drinks making it more confusing I think

"Hi Bob. This is ______ from OKC"

best response if I cant figure it out soon?

EDIT: nm found her on facebook

I guess that's a good example of why it's best to have them give you their number instead

Jenni, nice trip report! I enjoyed it a lot. Better than amazinmets "should I root for him or not" and ATF schadenfreudes, even!

Jenni,

fwiw, I've known three women who had eating disorders. All three incessantly claimed they had high metabolism, family genes, etc. I never mentioned it to any of them, since that's pretty much the nut low way to approach it. But if you don't have an eating disorder, don't try to explain it. Just say, "No. I'm fine. ty for your concern." Whatever. Trying to explain it just comes off like you're trying to hide it. Not saying you have a disorder or anything and you obviously look great. It's pretty weird that he would ask you that, too, but I guess he's had women in the past with that problem and is just concerned. Still, it's weird to bring it up.

i suppose he could have asked you if you were a rape victim post coitus and that would have been odder than the bulimic question, so there is upside for him.

either way solid trip report. i love your hair girl.

I think hes saying you're either socially awkward or a moron, or both.

I've had two POF women completely ignore my request for their number and just keep on emailing me. Very weird. Even weirder, both conversations have been ongoing for a month now.

They just want a penpal, not someone to date or ****

Is it pretty much the consensus everywhere that POF girls tend to be semi trashy single moms in general? Or as it a regional thing?

In the Windsor/Detroit area I'm finding that to be the case while OKC girls seem on average to be more educated and intelligent and much less likely to have kids.

^ this

What could you possibly be talking about that does not somehow include meeting up?

I've heard this also. POF means more replies, but it doesn't matter in the long run.

ya standard