She's had hers, they are now kids almost grown up. I'm treading very carefully on this. We've hungout a month now, most weekends. I'm going to Vegas this weekend, and she's made hints she wouldn't be happy if I hooked up with a random..... It's kind of scaring me. She's smokin hot and a blast to be around

Sent from my SPH-D710 using 2+2 Forums

Agreed.

The 38 year old was for a few months, the 50 year old was for 3 years, but it only went on that long because I was out of town for business most of the time. She wasn't needy and we wouldn't talk but like once a week. We had an understanding that was just a thing, and that I'd let her know when I was ready to settle down and start my life.

My fiancee is 24, I'm 30 now. I have a really cool woman. She lives in Belgium, and we're in the process of doing paperwork to move her here. I seriously do not recommend marrying any chick sub-27 unless they are grounded with a good job.

I also agree with not having kids with a 42 year old. She's honestly in a different place than you in her life right now. In 6 years, your outlook will be different as well.

How did you meet your fiancé?

I am creating an account as we speak. I am going with Match.com rather than POF or OK simply because I dont want everybody in my area looking at my account. My logic also was that the fact that Match is a paid service, only people that are taking it seriously or at least are not trolling would not pay to do it.

Thoughts?

Anyone in your area can create a free account on match and look at your profile, so don't think you'll be more incognito there.

Your second point seems to be the consensus. Paid site equals more serious dating.

2p2

Just sort of met here and then moved to Skype. Things progressed, np imo

Seeing a lot of click-throughs/visitors but no responses. I think it's my profile that's the issue. Been trying a couple of different angles and none of them has worked. Seems hard to write a profile that: (a) stands out, (b) doesn't give too much biographical info, and (d) isn't over the top gimmicky. I've rewritten the whole thing like 3 or 4 times. Pretty embarrassing.

Unexpectedly a hit with goth chicks though, lol. A couple have cold-messaged me, but that's not really going anywhere either.

What are you opening with?

Small sample size but I've detected trends in message response success. Early in the week they seem more receptive to responding to new people. By mid-to-late week they're busy selecting from their early week prospects or have already determined their weekend dates. Probably doesn't apply to serial daters or those just DTF.

Bump. Anyone want to comment on this? Also what's the best way to handle visitors and 4/5 star ratings? Obv send a message but reference the visit in the msg or just send the same msg you would to someone who hasn't visited your profile yet?

I've never paid for the A-list whatever. I don't really see any need for it.

As for how to approach the site, it depends on what your goals are. If you just want to get laid, then don't answer too many questions. I actually like OKC better than Match because you can answer a lot of questions and especially the controversial ones. For example, I don't want to date someone who will only date white people or someone who thinks homosexuality is a sin. So I do answer those.

Also, I'm not sure how much the match % helps. I do think, however, that the enemy percentage is pretty useful. If you have a +30% enemy rating, then they are probably answering a lot of questions in the "wrong" way and you're probably not compatible.

I message anyone I'm interested in regardless of their reply frequency. I've gotten pleny of responses from women who don't reply often and been ignored by women who reply frequently. I just don't pay any attention to it.

I don't pay, so I don't get to see visitors. If you're interested in messaging her, then message her. I would not mention that you saw she visited your profile. Just start a normal convo with her.

So you're a sexist hypocrit? Got it.

What's with "looking for friends"? Two girls have responded to messages only for me to return to their page and see they only have the "friends" box checked in their "looking for" section. I really don't get this at all.

Having some success with searching for profiles created in the past week + online. It's kind of weird how after a while, you see the same girls online all the time. The new ones seem less jaded / picky imo.

Anon: Depends on the girl, but I try to say something to indicate mutual interest then follow up with a question. A lot of them are visiting my profile, so I'm not sure if the messages are the issue.

d10. Playfully calling them out seems like the best move for visitors. Also, I'm pretty sure it's best not to choose invisible browsing. Girls who I visit do visit back on occasion. The whole visit-notification thing freaked me out at first, but I'm convinced it's one of the site's best features. The "A-list" invisible+visitors option seems unnecessary and kind of creepy tbh.

I thought all users could see who visited their profile unless they were invisible browsing with a list?

iirc, there's an option to go invisible w/o paying, but it takes your own visitor list away.

I think A-List is worth it so you don't have to let every woman know you visited their profile, or when you return to check out a woman's profile again, and to see when/if women read your messages. I think it's particularly worth it when you only pay $4.95/mo as I do, and all that took was an e-mail to OKC requesting the price.

Didn't think of this. Often I'll have to read a profile again before responding to a message, which I suppose isn't ideal. Seems bad to keep visiting their profile once you get into a conversation.

Don't know why people care so much about people seeing if you visited their profile. It's a dating site, you look at people's profiles, that's how it works.

This. I just don't care.

the biggest benefit to A list is the mailbox imo.

I like answering a lot of questions, the broadest ones and just pandering and putting "very important"

softballs like "is contraception morally wrong" etc are great and then you look like a soulmate to everyone.

Well you get the clingy or desperate vibe from them if you view it like 10 times... A few times is fine.

Man some guys are just pathetic. I checked my fake female profile for the first time in a while and its received three whiny messages from guys asking why "she" didn't respond.

Here's one of them:

Apr 1, 2013 – 10:31am
Hey ____,
Nice profile and pic...hope you say hi....

C

Apr 9, 2013 – 1:53pm
Come on _______....not even a hello...a thanks..a thanks but no thanks..a wink..a sneeze...something?? Not trying to give you a root canal....

Lol fake chick profile. Classic. Do you steal other guys lines?

Reconnaissance on the 'competition' was the intent of the profile. There hasn't been much if anything worth stealing though. The overwhelming majority of messages put zero effort into crafting it toward the target. I'm curious about the types of women the painfully obvious bulk message guys get responses from. I was going to cobble together some code to send out bulk messages but it's just not worth the effort.

Yeah, first off if I have no interest in a woman then I prefer her to not even know I visited her profile. If we are talking and I want to refresh my memory of her profile or questions or see anything new that was posted, I don't want it to come off as me being too interested with visits. It's not a huge deal but for $4.95/mo I think it's worth it. Also, you can check out youtalkfunny's page without him being able to connect your okc profile to your twoplustwo account.